TITLE: Great Expectations: The Collector's Edition AUTHORS: bellefleur and Emily Sim EMAIL ADDRESS: bellefleur1013@yahoo.com, xf_emily_sim@yahoo.ca RATING: PG-13 for occasional potty-mouth KEYWORDS: UST, MSR, S SPOILERS: Per Manum DISCLAIMER: Mulder and Scully belong to CC, FOX, etc. Their progeny belong to Mulder and Scully. SUMMARY: After the IVF attempt, the partners deal with some unexpected news. First posted: July 2005-July 2006 Revised edition: May 2008 General notes: This revision is not substantially different from the original; we just corrected some spelling and punctuation. However, I swear there are gremlins running amok in this story because every time I post a text file to the web, it ends up with new mistakes that aren't in any of the text files I have on my computer. So, if there are any remaining glitches, I blame them on the gremlins. But, there were a number of betas involved at various points in the process. Credit for any mistakes that we did manage to weed out goes to (all the beta credits from the various parts are collected here to simplify): X-PhileChick#35 (a.k.a. UnderMySkinner), xdks, Tali, Siggy, pghfoxfan, Audu2, mimic117. A big thanks to you all, ladies! ******* ******* TITLE: Great Expectations I: "And baby makes...?" AUTHOR: bellefleur KEYWORDS: Scully POV SPOILERS: Per Manum SUMMARY: Scully visits her obstetrician and receives some unexpected news. * * * * * * * * * * 10:42 am I'm not sure how long I sat there in the car, but I was stunned into immobility. Maybe it was some kind of shock or delayed reaction. All I know is that I couldn't bring myself to move. In my lap lay the grainy black and white image that the doctor had handed to me before I left. Staring down at it, I could still see in my mind's eye the moving version, of which this was only a single frame frozen in time. But I still couldn't believe what the doctor told me. I had known from the beginning that this could happen. Even before we began the in vitro, Dr. Parenti had explained to me all the risk factors. But for some reason, I never really considered that it might happen to me. Just the fact that I had gotten pregnant seemed enough of a surprise. *** ++Fourteen Weeks Earlier++ "Dana, have a seat." The receptionist had informed me that Dr. Parenti was ready to see me, so I gently knocked on his door and then entered the impressive office as he invited me in. Today was the big day, the day of the procedure, but the doctor wanted to walk me through the possibilities and risks before we got started. While I tried to get comfortable in one of the upholstered chairs facing his desk, he finished signing a form and then slid it into a folder and placed it aside. Then with hands folded, he leaned forward and offered me his full attention. But I'm not sure how much of my attention was really focused on him. I was nervous, understandably, and eager to get on with the procedure. Dr. Parenti had always shown me the respect of a colleague, but I felt that I already knew everything I needed to know and that verbalizing these details was unnecessary. In retrospect, I'm sure it was his legal obligation to go over this with me, and perhaps I needed to listen more carefully than I realized, but at the time it was excruciatingly tedious. "Now, before we begin the procedure, I want to review the risk factors. There are some studies that argue for an increased rate of birth defects and low birth weight among IVF babies, but the most prevalent risk is multiple births. And, of course, the chance of complications increases for women over 35. There is also a possibility of ectopic pregnancy, although I don't think you're at high risk for that. "We've been able to successfully create four embryos from your ova and the donated sperm. To increase your chances, I think our best option is to implant them all today. However, I need to make sure you understand that this will be our only shot. If this attempt fails, we can discuss other options, but those will not include your own ova." I nodded to the doctor in acknowledgment and perhaps impatience. "I understand. I've reviewed the risks and statistics. I'm ready to try this." *** *Ring* I practically jumped in my seat as the silence of the car was pierced by the shrill sound of my cell phone ringing. I took a deep breath to calm myself before answering. "Scully." "Hey, how'd the appointment go?" "Fine." It wasn't the truth, but I wasn't ready to talk to Mulder about this yet. "Good. I was just wondering if you'd be in before lunch. Skinner wants to see us, and I need to tell him what time we can be there." Focusing on work was just what the doctor ordered. I could feel myself becoming grounded again as my professional demeanor snapped into place. "I'm on my way in now. I should be there in about 15 minutes." * * * * * * * * * * 12:02 pm I could just make out my muted reflection in the stainless steel doors of the elevator car as we descended to the basement. I watched as my hand traveled to my abdomen of its own accord, gently smoothing over the jacket that still managed to hide what lay beneath. Not for the first time today, I wondered if I should have recognized the warning signs myself and anticipated the doctor's news instead of being so shocked by it. "Scully!" Mulder's concerned voice in my ear was punctuated by his gentle touch on my arm. "Hmmm?" "That's the third time I said your name. You've been a million miles away ever since you got in today. I'm not even sure you heard a word Skinner said. Is everything okay?" My hand dropped to my side and I averted my eyes from his and from my own reflection. I wasn't sure how to answer that question. Mulder apparently took my hesitation as a negative response. "Did something happen at your appointment? Is the baby okay?" Before I had a chance to say anything, the elevator signaled that we had reached our stop. But my partner's hand lingered on my arm and held me in place until I could give him an answer. "I don't want to talk about this at work. Why don't you come over for dinner tonight, and then we can talk." I could tell he wasn't completely satisfied with my reply, but he nodded curtly and then released his grasp. Ever the gentleman, he moved his hand to my back and ushered me out of the elevator doors ahead of him, while I mentally reprimanded myself for letting personal matters distract me at work. But Mulder was right--I hadn't heard a word that Skinner had said. My thoughts had been elsewhere. * * * * * * * * * * 6:24 pm It was a good thing that I had decided to prepare a simple stir fry meal because I found myself terribly absent-minded as I wandered around the kitchen, setting things down and then forgetting where I had put them. I was too preoccupied with figuring out what I was going to say to Mulder. Why was it so easy for me to communicate complex scientific theories in minute detail, but when it came to personal issues, I just couldn't find the words to express myself? I remembered facing the same problem that day when I first learned the big news. *** ++Nine Weeks Earlier++ My hands were virtually shaking with the effort of containing my excitement, making it difficult for me to perform the simple task of inserting the key in the door. Although Mulder had offered to come to the appointment with me, it was something I needed to do alone, and he respected that choice. However, it didn't keep him from loitering at my apartment to hear the news right away. I could feel my anticipation building as I pushed the door open. The lights were low when I stepped inside, and initially I didn't realize he was still there. I felt the slightest twinge of disappointment until I saw the familiar head lift from the couch. "I must have dozed off. I was waiting for you to get back." This would be the first time I would vocalize the news. Despite my excitement, I was almost afraid to say it out loud--like it was still too good to be true, and if I spoke, it would wake me from the dream. But my eyes must have said it all before the words ever reached my lips. "It worked, didn't it? You're pregnant." I nodded, and I laughed. Then I cried. And Mulder laughed with me, and then he caught me up into a big bear hug and buried his face in my ear and whispered, "I'm so happy for you." My breath caught at that statement, but then I reminded myself to let it out. I couldn't fool myself into thinking that this was "our" baby. It was mine, and he was happy for *me*. This had been our arrangement. I had asked for his help, but with no strings attached. He did his part, and the rest would be up to me. I gently pulled away from his hug, chastising myself not to let my foolish dreams dampen the moment. But I carefully hid my face from him as I turned toward the kitchen and found something else to focus on. "Have you eaten dinner yet? I'm starving." "I'll bet. You're eating for two now." *** I was just turning down the rice to simmer when I heard the knock on the door. Wiping my palms on my legs to dry the sweat that I didn't realize was there, I reached for the knob and turned. As I expected, Mulder was standing there on the other side. "Can I come in?" I stepped aside, feeling a bit embarrassed. I hadn't realized that I was just standing there staring at him. I was nervous, and I wasn't hiding it well, which only made things more awkward between us. I'm not even sure that I was this bad when I asked him to be the donor. "Can I take your coat?" It was too formal a statement between us, but he obliged, and I was grateful because it gave me something to do. When I turned around, he was standing there with a look of expectation, and I found myself at a loss as to what I should do next. I still wasn't sure that I was ready to talk about this yet. But Mulder was. "Give me a hint, Scully. I'm dying here." I could tell as soon as the words left his mouth that he regretted them. It was just like him to always assume the worst when it came to my health. I suppose I hadn't helped matters much. All he knew was that I had gotten important news from my doctor and that I was having a hard time telling him what it was. Even though that news came from an obstetrician, he was probably thinking it had something to do with my cancer. "I'm fine, Mulder." I was trying to be reassuring, but my words seemed to have the opposite effect. Mulder was being considerate enough to bite his tongue, but I could tell that his frustration with me was mounting, magnified by the worries that I had yet to assuage. For some reason, I wasn't able to just tell him what I needed to. So, I figured I would show him. After all, it was always good to start with the evidence. Crossing to my desk, I pulled out the slim envelope that held the ultrasound photo. I took a deep breath while unsheathing the image, hoping to bolster my courage. I had delayed the inevitable long enough. When I turned, I found that Mulder had moved up behind me, so with no further ado I handed him the picture. He concentrated on the black and white image for a long moment but then looked back at me in confusion. "Give me some help here, Scully." I let my finger outline a gentle curve toward the left side of the picture. "This is a head." From his expression, it was clear that the remainder of the image was still a puzzle to him, and he looked back to me waiting for further elaboration. Why couldn't I just say the words? I guess I was still having a hard time accepting the reality of it myself. For now, I could only continue my game of charades. Taking another deep breath, I pointed at a matching curve on the other side and explained: "And so is this." Mulder frowned at me. "The baby has two heads?" Men can be so dense sometimes. I'm pretty sure I didn't say that out loud, but he must have caught the gist of what I was thinking from the look I gave him. And then I saw the realization wash over his face. "Twins?" I could only nod mutely at him. Mulder looked back down at the ultrasound in his hands, this time fully understanding its mysteries. "Oh, my God." Yep. That pretty much summed it up. * * * * * * * * * * Title: Great Expectations II: Mulder's Little Dividends Author: Emily Sim Keywords: Mulder POV * * * * * The shock must have shown on my face because I found myself being forcibly pushed to the sofa. My feet were hastily pulled onto the coffee table and a cushion was shoved underneath. Scully was making all sorts of comforting sounds but for the life of me I couldn't make out the individual words. "Take a deep breath, Mulder. Come on, relax." I shook myself out of my stupor. "It's okay, really, I'm fine." Then I noticed her worried expression and pulled her down beside me. "I think you're the one who should be sitting with your feet up." I replaced my feet with hers on the cushion, giving it a little fluff first. "Mulder, I'm pregnant, not sick. And I'm only three months along." She moved her feet off the table and turned to face me. "Twins?" "Yes, twins." "Two for the price of one?" "Don't be a brat." She playfully swatted me. "Wow. How do you feel about that?" I watched her smile fade a little as she recovered and hid her anxiety. "There are some additional risks involved where twins are concerned." "Risks? What kind of risks?" "Well, compared to facing down fluke-men and unknown assailants I'd say it's a piece of cake. I'll be fine, Mulder." I found myself a little frustrated with her casualness, but I realized that dealing with anything out of the ordinary with denial was a Scully trademark. I was still a little uncertain about the whole risk thing. I hadn't reached that part yet in my copy of What to Expect When You're Expecting. "Mulder, any pregnancy has risks." I wanted to tell her that this wasn't just any pregnancy; that I was part of this too. Then I wondered if I really had the right to demand more than we'd agreed to. I wasn't sure that I'd be able to keep things strictly platonic. "There's a chance of early delivery with multiples, but Dr. Parenti has assured me they will be taking every precaution." "How early?" I had visions of ambulance sirens and emergency doctors. "Relax, will you? I've got quite a ways to go. It'll be fine." "So, how're you feeling about all of it? Are you happy?" I watched her fiddle with the edge of her sweater. "How could I not be?" I noted her hesitation and sensed something other than joy hidden behind her stiff smile. "It's just that you didn't plan on having two to deal with at once. It must be a bit of a shock." I was trying for gentle and understanding, hoping I might get an honest response about her feelings, but I wasn't surprised when she was less than forthcoming. "It's everything I ever wanted." She still seemed to be hiding something, or at least not being completely straight about how she was feeling. I guess I figured that contributing half of the necessary genetic material entitled me to at least a modicum of honesty, but then again, she wouldn't be Scully if it were that easy. I decided to let it drop for the moment and move on to other concerns. "What about work?" "Mulder, I told you. This will not affect my work. Women have babies and work all the time. You don't need to worry." I took a deep breath. I knew the work issue was going to be a sensitive one. Scully had an unhealthy need to always be on top of her game regardless of her health. I could recall her cancer days and her dogged determination to be the perfect agent, perfect partner despite her failing health. Even when her father died she only took the half-day for the funeral. She had a tendency to push herself and ignore both her emotional and physical needs. "Did the doctor say anything about working?" I felt a need to push her on this. "Mulder, I'm only 14 weeks along." I watched her smooth her jacket over a noticeable bump and had a flash of a very pregnant Scully, walking - no, make that waddling - arm in arm with me, coming back from lunnch at Pete's Deli. I quickly pushed the image down. This was an arrangement between friends. I had to be careful I didn't make it more than it was, despite how possessive I was beginning to feel. "What are you grinning about, Mulder?" I laughed softly. "I'm imagining you at nine months." She groaned. "I'll be the size of a small whale. I just hope the nausea is gone by then." "Throwing up for two?" I chuckled. "It feels like it. It's mostly in the morning and late afternoon." "Do you need someone to hold your hair back?" "I can manage just fine. Here -" she threw a pillow at me. "Put your feet up, I need to see to the rest of the dinner. It should be just about ready." "Need any help?" "The table's all set, so just sit." I watched her move to the kitchen, the grainy black and white picture clutched in my hand. Twins. I traced the outline of the heads that she had pointed out to me. I could hardly get my own head wrapped around the fact that she was even pregnant, but now twins? My twins, my babies. Scully was pregnant with my babies. Not one, but two little Scully-Mulders. The thought thrilled me and scared the shit out of me at the same time. I wasn't sure what she expected of me now. I could see the advantages of IVF with an anonymous donor. Get off; catch it in a cup; feel good handing it over knowing you've helped someone. Done. Walk away. No responsibilities for any offspring you've helped create. Then again, I wasn't sure if I was the kind of man who could contribute my genes and walk away. This was a dance neither of us knew how to do. I had all sorts of questions around my role in her life now, and the life of my children. Seeing the image of those two little beings had touched something in me. These were my babies. I didn't know if I could play the part of concerned, involved but uninvolved friend. That's when it hit me; I wanted to be the daddy. * * * * * * * * * * TITLE: Great Expectations III: Mothering AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: Scully breaks the news to her mother. * * * * * * * * * * Foregoing her slippers, Scully pulled her robe tight around her while she shuffled toward the door. The persistent knocks sounded again before she could cover the distance of her living room. "I'm coming!" She followed this with a few colorful phrases mumbled under her breath. If this was Mulder trying to drag her off on another wild goose chase on a Saturday morning, she just wasn't up for it. Out of habit, she stood on her toes to look through the peephole as she unlatched the chain. Recognizing the convex image through the distorted lens, she dropped back to her heels with a sigh. She realized then that she should have expected this. With a turn of her wrist, she opened the door to admit her guest. "Hi, Mom." "How are you feeling, Dana? Has the nausea subsided yet?" Scully shut the door behind her mother and then turned to face her scrutinizing gaze. Less than an hour before, Scully had called to cancel their scheduled brunch, saying that she just didn't feel up to it this morning. Perceptive as always, Maggie had interpreted this to mean that her daughter was battling morning sickness again. Scully knew she should be grateful for her mother's tender loving care, but she wasn't really in the mood to entertain company right now. "Well, I haven't thrown up for the last half hour, so I guess that's something." "Have a seat, dear. Let me make you some tea. Do you think you could handle that?" It was hard to tell what her stomach could handle these days, but she knew it would be easier to give her mother something to do, so Scully just nodded and took a seat at the kitchen table as instructed. Maggie moved around the kitchen with practiced ease, filling the kettle with water as she spoke over her shoulder. "How did your last appointment go? Does the doctor think the morning sickness will let up soon?" Scully hesitated before replying. She hadn't told her mother the big news yet, hoping to tell her in person rather than over the phone. Last night, she had studiously rehearsed how she would bring it up over brunch and field (or deflect) all of her mother's difficult questions that were sure to follow. But with her nausea and the cancellation of their plans, all of her well-articulated statements had fled her mind. "Uh, everything's going fine, but the sickness might stick around for a while longer." Maggie pulled two mugs out of the cupboard and set them on the counter before turning to take a seat next to her daughter while they waited for the water to boil. "Oh, Dana, is this the ultrasound?" Until that moment, it had entirely escaped Scully's notice that "Exhibit A" was sitting right in front of her on the table. She didn't know where her mind was these days. Before she could respond, her mother had already unsheathed the image and was perusing it with an eagle eye. "Is this what I think it is?" Scully offered her a crooked smile and said with a hint of irony, "Surprise!" "I knew something was up, just from the way you were carrying." "Mom, how could you know? I'm less than four months along." "And you're already starting to show. Even with Bill Jr., my biggest baby, I didn't show as soon as you did. No wonder you're so sick. Do you remember my friend Barbara? When she was pregnant with her twins, she was sick the entire time." "Thanks for the comfort," Scully replied with sarcasm. "I'm just saying, dear, that this changes things. It will make it twice as difficult for you to get the proper nutrition. Have you thought about nutritional supplements, or those breakfast shakes?" "Mom, I'm a doctor. I know how to take care of myself." The kettle whistled its readiness, and Scully was hoping the interruption would bring a reprieve. She should have known better. Maggie didn't miss a beat as she stood to retrieve the kettle and pour the water. "Yes, but this is your first pregnancy. You can read all you want to in books, but until you've gone through it yourself, you can't truly understand it. Every pregnancy is different. And I'm particularly concerned about yours. I know that women are having healthy babies much later in life than in my day, but you really shouldn't have waited this long. It only increases your chance of complications." "I'm not going to get into this conversation with you again. I know as well as you do--if not better--what the risks are, and I know that having twins only complicates things. This isn't what I planned for my life, but I'm not going to turn down this gift. If you'd asked me a year ago, I never would've thought I could have one child, let alone two. If anything, it makes it easier that I only have to go through this once." The water was now poured and the tea bags dispensed, so Maggie returned to the table and set down a mug in front of each of them. "And what does Fox think of all of this? He's certainly not going to let you handle this alone, is he?" "Mom..." she said in that impatient tone that all children have mastered. "Don't 'Mom' me, Dana. I've heard all your excuses. But things are different now. You can't possibly handle two babies on your own. Don't you think it's time you two started to talk about settling down?" Fed up with her mother's intrusion, Scully pushed away from the table in exasperation and crossed to the sink. Her stomach was feeling unsettled again, possibly from the stress of the conversation, and she preferred to be near a drain if the nausea got the better of her. "It's not like that between us. This is my problem, not Mulder's. He only agreed to help me conceive. He didn't sign on for anything else. The work's too important to him for me to ask him to walk away from it so he can stay at home with me and play daddy." "Have you even asked him what he wants? Dana, that man has been in love with you since the first day I met him." She read the impending protest on her daughter's face and held up a hand to preempt it. "You tell me the work is important to him, and I understand that because it's important to you, too. And yet here you've made the decision to take on a new challenge, an even greater adventure than either of you have ever faced. Don't you think that Fox might want the same thing?" The fact was, Scully didn't want to let herself hope that her mother might be right. If she were truly honest, she was absolutely terrified at facing parenthood alone, especially now that she was going to be outnumbered. And just as there was no one else she could imagine as the biological father to her children, there was no one she would rather have by her side to face this greatest of challenges. She had seen Mulder's compassion and patience on enough occasions to know that he would make an excellent father. Over the years, he had become the yang to her yin, and she was sure that in this as in all else he would compensate for her weaknesses with his own strengths. But she couldn't let herself think about it. Mulder had only agreed to the conception, not to fatherhood. "I can't have this conversation right now, Mom. I need to lie down." Maggie stood and stepped toward her, the concern written on her face. "Of course, sweetheart. Can I get you anything?" Scully offered her a reassuring smile. "No, that's okay. I just need to rest. I'll feel better in a while." Making a quick escape to her bedroom, Scully was sure to close the door behind her. She loved her mother dearly, but the woman just couldn't stay out of her children's lives. Would she herself be the same way someday? After removing her robe and hanging it on the back of the door, Scully climbed between the sheets and tried to relax. She could hear her mother moving around the apartment, probably cleaning up after the tea that had gone untouched, and maybe taking it upon herself to find other domestic chores. Scully didn't have the energy right now to get up and fight with her over it, so she decided to let it be and tried to allow the muted noises to lull her to sleep. But her doze was suddenly interrupted by the distinctive sound of a knock at the front door. * * * * * "Oh, hi, Mrs. Scully. I didn't realize you and Scu-, uh, Dana had plans this morning. I don't mean to interrupt." Mulder was obviously surprised to find his partner's mother answering her door, and his body language clearly expressed his uncertainty as to whether he should go or stay. Maggie made the decision for him as she opened the door farther and stepped back, ushering him inside. "Nonsense, Fox, you're not interrupting anything. Dana's resting right now." "Is she okay?" His grave expression and tone emphasized his concern. "Just a little morning sickness. I hear she's been battling that a lot these days." Mulder's features were more relaxed now, although his attention was focused on the closed bedroom door. "Yeah. I'm amazed she can even work some days. I feel so helpless watching her go through it, but there's really nothing I can do. And bringing up the subject only makes things worse. Somehow I'm not supposed to notice that she spends half the day turning green and running to the bathroom." He looked back at Maggie now with a sheepish grin, as though realizing that he was explaining his partner to the one person who knew her better than he did. "But you know Dana. She always insists on being invincible." Maggie smiled back at him warmly. "Yes, she got that stubborn streak from her father." Mulder wondered if maybe that trait wasn't inherited from both sides of the family, but he knew better than to express that thought aloud. At the natural pause in their conversation, he decided it might be a good time to excuse himself. "I should probably go now. I didn't come by for anything important, so I don't want to disturb her. Can you tell her I stopped by?" "Actually, Fox, I'm glad you're here. There's something I'd like to talk to you about." This situation suddenly made him very nervous. He had no idea what Mrs. Scully might want to discuss with him, but he was sure it would have something to do with his partner's pregnancy and his role in the matter. There were so many things that he and Scully hadn't ironed out yet, or even mentioned, and he certainly didn't want to discuss them with her mother when he hadn't even voiced them to Scully. But Maggie's hand was outstretched toward the couch in invitation, and he knew he couldn't refuse her. Whatever it was, he was obliged to hear her out. * * * * * Through the filter of the bedroom door, Scully couldn't make out every detail of the conversation on the other side, but she caught the gist of it--especially her mother's insistence on having a talk with Mulder. Scully felt compelled to put a stop to this before it got out of hand and her mother opened a can of worms that neither she nor Mulder was ready for. Unfortunately, her stomach had other ideas. After a few uncomfortable minutes, the wave of nausea subsided, thankfully without demanding any more of her stomach's meager contents. Once Scully felt it was safe to extend her perimeter beyond the confines of the bathroom, she swiftly donned her robe and slipped out into the hall. Her intention had been to march right into the living room and put a stop to her mother's inquisition, but the conversation she encountered brought her up short, and she lingered out of their line of vision, her presence apparently still unnoticed. "It just never ceases to amaze me how strong she is," Mulder was saying. "I realized a long time ago that I never would've made it this far without her by my side, but she's just so self-sufficient and independent that I don't feel like she really needs me. Trust me, I want to be here for her and help out however I can, but I don't really think she'll accept it." "That's what I'm trying to tell you, Fox. Dana isn't willingly going to accept our help, but she's going to need us more than she realizes--both of us. I'll try to give her a hand with the cooking and cleaning as much as I can, but she leans on you in ways that she would never turn to me. Even if she won't admit it, Dana depends on you. Yes, she's very strong, but so much of that strength is drawn from you. All I'm asking is for you to be her friend and her partner, just as you have always been. The only thing that's changed now is the challenges that you'll face together." "I promise you I'll do whatever I can. She hasn't asked anything of me, but I never intended to let her face this alone. She's too much a part of my life for me to just pretend like this doesn't involve me, too. But what I worry about the most is her health, the one part that I can't do anything about. I hate watching her get sick all the time and feeling helpless to stop it. And especially now, knowing that she's supposed to be eating for three instead of two. But I can't talk her into eating much when she knows that it'll just come right back up again." Scully decided it was time to intervene. "If you think you're frustrated, try being me." The two heads peeking over the back of the couch turned as one, revealing two slightly embarrassed faces. Mulder stood when he saw her approach. "Scully. We didn't mean to wake you." "I wasn't really sleeping. Must be the tension level in the apartment." Mulder squirmed a bit under her gaze. It was clear that he felt guilty for talking about her behind her back--or at least for being caught at it. Maggie looked slightly less guilty and didn't jump in to defend herself. "You can both stop worrying about me. I'm fine." Now Mulder's guilty look turned into a glare, and Scully deflated a little. "I admit that being pregnant isn't easy, and I don't have any experience at it, but you two have to trust that I'm a doctor, and that I'll do everything I can to stay healthy. Now, it's a beautiful day outside, and I think it's about time that you both got out and enjoyed it." To their credit, the two conspirators accepted their dismissal without protest. Maggie gathered up her purse and sweater and then came over to give her daughter a kiss and a few words of parting before making her exit. Mulder lingered, clearly wanting to speak to his partner alone. Scully closed the door behind her mother and then turned to forestall his apology. "Don't worry, Mulder, I'm not upset. I know you both have your hearts in the right place, if not your heads." He smirked at her assumption before responding. "Actually, I was going to ask you if you felt up to going out for lunch. I checked the menu at that new deli down the street, and it turns out they serve both pickles and ice cream...among other things." In spite of herself, Scully cracked a smile at his joke. "Sorry, not today. I already turned my mother down for brunch." She paused for a beat and dropped her gaze to her hands playing with the belt on her robe. "However, if you're concerned about my diet, you could make a trip to the store for me." Her offer was a concession, and they both knew it. Mulder was surprised that she would trust him with her grocery list, let alone ask for help, so he wasn't about to refuse. At his nod of acquiescence, Scully walked over to the fridge to retrieve her short list from its magnetic clip. Making a stop by her wallet to pull out a couple of bills, she returned to the front door where Mulder awaited her return. When she extended her hand, he withdrew the list but refused the money, and she decided it wasn't worth arguing with him about it. "I'll be back before you know it." His face melted into a warm smile, and Scully felt herself melt in response. And then he surprised her with a quick kiss to the cheek before disappearing out the door. Finally alone again in the sanctuary of her apartment, Scully leaned back against the closed door. A tear escaped her eye before she even knew where it came from, and she quickly sniffed back the others that threatened to follow. The only word she could apply to this whole situation was "overwhelming." There was so much to take in and so much that was changing, not least of all her own body. And now she was going to have two eager helpers. She suspected, however, that they might become more of a hindrance than a help. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate Mulder's involvement, but she was having a hard enough time fighting off her fantasies about him playing the doting father. And now, if he would be coming around constantly, running her errands and dropping kisses on her cheek, it certainly wouldn't be any easier for her to think of him as merely a friend. With a sigh, she pushed away from the door. "Heaven help me." She would need it. * * * * * * * * * * Title: Great Expectations 4: Scully's Twin Paradox Author: Emily Sim ************** "You know, honey, a little chamomile tea may help with that." Scully might have managed some comment designed to divert the older woman's attention; she would have that is, if she could have disregarded her churning stomach for a moment. Dolores mistook her silence for license to continue. "My daughter is fifteen weeks along. Sick as a dog the first month, poor thing. The chamomile tea did wonders for settling her stomach." Scully smiled weakly, at a loss for what to say. She wasn't sure if it was the saltines that were ever present with her lunch orders, or if her jackets were doing a poor job of hiding her growing bulge, but if Dolores had figured it out, chances were others were becoming suspicious as well. They hadn't gotten to the 'how do I tell Skinner' part of what they were doing, and she wasn't sure they could do that until they'd done the 'how does this affect our partnership' discussion. The last thing she wanted to do was have a conversation with the lunch counter lady in the middle of a workday. She gripped her lunch tray harder as a wave of nausea rolled through her. Dolores was still talking, and there were now several other employees lined up behind her. She interrupted the older woman. "Thanks, Dolores. I've got to get back to the office." "Oh, sure, honey. Chamomile tea, you remember that now." Scully nodded, moving as quickly as she was could, worried she was going to lose whatever was left in her stomach right in the middle of the FBI cafeteria. ************* Mulder found Scully in the downstairs office twisting and turning in front of a small hand-held mirror. He stood silently at the door watching, finding her antics endearing. "Trying to see if there's something there?" Her frown was not what he expected. "I think everyone knows." She dropped the mirror back onto her desk. "What do you mean 'everyone knows'? Who knows?" "Dolores guessed." He took note of her lunch tray sitting untouched on her desk. "The saltines?" "I guess so. That or the lovely green pallor I seem to wear these days." "That doesn't mean everyone knows, Scully." He took a step forward. "You really can't see much. There's just a small bump, but you'd have to be looking for it." It took effort to keep his hands at his sides. The urge to touch her had gotten worse. He supposed there was some raw alpha-male instinct taking over, some Neanderthal pride at having gotten her pregnant. He knew the Gunmen thought something was up. Twice now he'd caught Frohike making veiled comments, which probably meant they'd been keeping tabs on her medical file. He'd have to find a way to warn him off before one of them said something to Scully. He helped her put her jacket back on. "Are you going to eat?" He pointed to the lunch sitting on her desk. It didn't look like much to him: soup, crackers, and a small container of milk. It was her meal of choice these days, and he wasn't sure she was managing to get much of it down. In fact, he had been concerned for some time now. He had expected her to have gained more weight than she had at this stage; at least, that's what the books indicated. She was pale, and though she tried to hide it from him, he knew she was still battling nausea. "Yeah. Join me?" "I'd love to, but I'm on my way to see Skinner. I just came to grab the notes I made concerning that case in Jacksonville." "Jacksonville?" She groaned. "Tell me you're not submitting a 302 for that?" "I've asked Skinner to let us have a look. Hey, it'll be another nice trip--" "Do not use the words 'nice' and 'forest' together in a sentence." "Back country. I was going to say back country." "Same difference." "Try and eat all of that, okay?" "Mulder." He opened his mouth to say more, but shut it just as quickly. Now was not the time to lay claim to anything more than concern for her health and the health of the babies -- his babies -- their babies. She didn't seem up to having a discussion right now concerning their relationship -- or partnership, or whatever the hell kind of 'ship it was -- and neither was he. He wasn't exactly sure what he would say, either. He was getting tired of trying to hold it all inside and maintain a respectable distance when all he wanted to do was hold her and run his hands over the evidence of new life within her. "I'll probably be an hour or so. I've left a copy of the notes from the last case on your desk." "And I suppose you're hoping I'll type the report, give it my scientific polish?" "Only if you want to keep us employed." He gathered up his notes, glad to see her smiling a little. "Back in a bit." ************ With Mulder gone, Scully felt that she could allow herself to let go just a little. She was exhausted, not only from the constant nausea she battled, but also from the pretense she tried so hard to keep up. She didn't want him to think she couldn't do her job, didn't want to worry him. He could be such a mother hen sometimes. She was always concerned he would hear her throwing up; the downstairs washroom was too close to the office. Or afraid he would walk in on her; he'd actually done that once or twice in the past when he couldn't wait for her to come back and hear his latest brilliant idea. She might be able to handle it all better if she could just get some sleep, but it seemed all she did was toss and turn. If the nausea wasn't keeping her up, her thoughts were. Some nights she lay awake absolutely panicked with what the future held. She picked up a saltine and broke a small corner off. Her stomach growled in response. She was hungry, but nothing on the tray appealed to her. She'd been doing this all week now. She bought milk, knowing she needed the calcium, but couldn't get past how it smelled to her. She usually ended up dumping it down the sink when Mulder wasn't looking. The soup was marginally more palatable. The heat felt good, but she could usually only manage a sip or two before it felt like it was going to come right back up. She lifted the tray and set it down on Mulder's desk. Right now she didn't think she had the energy to eat, let alone type up a report. All she wanted to do was have a nap. Deciding that he would be gone long enough for her to close her eyes, she cleared a spot on her desk. She pulled off her jacket and folded it up. Right now she could be fluffing a brick and she wouldn't care too much. Laying her head down, she closed her eyes. She just needed five minutes and then she could get the report done and attempt a little of the soup. Scully closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift off. ************** Mulder thought it was one of the sweetest things he'd ever seen, but the sentiment only lasted until he caught sight of her lunch, still sitting uneaten on the tray. He couldn't be absolutely sure, but he was almost positive she hadn't eaten more than a mouthful all week. Even Skinner's secretary had made a veiled comment regarding her pallor. Enough was enough. He quietly slipped from the room to use his cell phone. He wanted to let her sleep, but he also knew he'd catch three kinds of hell from her if she overheard him. He wasn't going to give her a chance to react. "Kim?" He tried to keep his voice quiet. "Agent Mulder?" "Yes." "Could you speak up? I can hardly hear you." He moved a little farther into the hallway. "Can I speak to the A.D., please?" "You just missed him. He'll be tied up in a meeting for the next hour." "I'll just leave a message then. Agent Scully isn't feeling well, and I'm going to drive her home." "I'll be sure to let him know." "Thanks, Kim." "No problem, Agent Mulder. I hope she's going to be okay. I know the chemo can really take its toll." "What?" "The chemotherapy. I've heard it can be the hardest part to get through." "You think she has cancer?" "Well, yes. I just assumed...I mean, the last time I saw her this ill...." "Oh God, no. It's not the cancer, it's just morning sick--" Oh, fuck. There was dead silence from the other end of the line. "Kim?" He heard her clear her throat before she spoke. "I'll let the A.D. know you're away for the rest of the day." "Kim, if you could keep this to yourself, w-- she'd appreciate it." "Sure thing. Tell her I hope she's feeling better soon." Mulder hung up the phone, a little unnerved. He couldn't be sure Kim had filled in the blanks, but damn him, if he couldn't keep his mouth shut, they wouldn't need Dolores. He was doing a fine job of it himself. He returned to their office to find Scully still conked out on her desk. She was going to be grumpy when he woke her up, but that was going to be mild compared to how she might react when she found out that he'd arranged the rest of the afternoon off. He sighed and gave her shoulder a light tap. No response. He ran his hand up and down her back and was rewarded with a tiny groan. He bent down closer to her and brushed the hair from the side of her face. "Wakey, wakey, Agent Scully." "Go away." "I need you to wake up, Scully." "God, move back." "Scully?" "Can't stand the smell." "Smell?" "Aftershave. It's making me sick." "Oh." "Just move away a little." "I'll move, okay? But right now, I need you to get up." She sat up slowly. Her face had crease marks from the jacket folds. She was pale and he could detect a slight tremor in her body. "You okay?" "Fine, fine. I'm sorry I fell asleep. Give me a second here and I'll be ready." "Ready? Ready for what? The only thing you're going to be ready for right now is home." "Excuse me?" "Scully, I'm taking you home." "I'll be fi--" she clasped a hand to her mouth. Mulder was quick, grabbing the nearest wastebasket and shoving it between her and the desk. He was just in time as she began heaving. There wasn't much to come up, and he knew enough to realize that it was a very bad sign. He doubted that she'd eaten all day, beyond the nibble out of one cracker that he could see. He ran one hand soothingly down her back and held her hair with the other until she stopped. He removed the wastebasket when she was done. "Just give me a minute, Mulder. Stop giving me that look. I'm okay." "You're not okay, Scully. You haven't eaten in--heck, I don't know how long it's been since you've managed a meal. You're white as a ghost, your hands are shaking, and shouldn't you be showing a lot more than you are?" "Shhh, someone will hear you." "Right now, I don't care. I'm taking you home and calling your mom." "No." "Yes. Scully, I've already called up and left a message with Kim." "You didn't!" "I did." He watched her sink back into the chair. "I'm too tired to fight you right now." He'd take what he could get. Mulder leaned in to help her up, but she began shooing him away again, one hand pinching her nose closed. "Aftershave. Move back." He wondered if he'd survive five more months of this. "Hold on, I've got an idea." He headed to the sink and wetted down a couple of paper towels, adding a squirt of soap for good measure. He ended up with a slightly damp shirt collar, but hopefully he'd gotten all the aftershave off. He made his way back to the desk, where Scully had given in and laid her head back down. He rubbed her head, afraid to get too close in case he still smelled and caused her to get sick again. "Come on, Scully. Time to go." He helped her stand up, amused when she began sniffing the air around him. "What'd you do? Wash it off?" "Yes, I did. Couldn't have you holding your nose all the way home." "Thanks." "Anytime, Scully. Anytime." ************ Mulder's first look inside his partner's apartment in over two weeks told him everything he needed to know about how sick she must be feeling. He had never known Scully to leave dishes in the sink, or all over the counter. She had not protested when he removed her shoes and jacket and tucked her into bed. Given how tired she looked, he hoped she'd be able to sleep. He knew she needed it. He decided he had time to take care of some of the mess for her, but first, he needed to call her mother. He would not hear the end of it if he didn't let Mrs. Scully know what was going on. "Fox, is everything all right?" "Actually, Mrs. Scul --" "Maggie, Fox." Right. He kept forgetting that. "I brought Dana home from work. She wasn't feeling well and hasn't been eating much --" "Has she been taking her pills?" "Pills?" "Yes. The last time she saw her doctor he was worried that she was borderline for hyperemesis gravidarum. He gave her a prescription to deal with it." "Hyper - what?" "Severe nausea. At her last appointment she was down five pounds, and with her size and the fact that she's carrying twins her doctor was quite concerned." "She throws up a lot. She thinks I don't hear her, but the washroom isn't that far away." "Her doctor was concerned enough about her weight to give her a prescription." "I haven't seen her take anything. Hold on, I'll check the bathroom." Years of living out of suitcases and in each other's apartments, sometimes helping each other pack, left no secrets. He knew exactly where she kept her drugs and he had no difficulty finding what he was looking for. The prescription was made out for almost two weeks ago. He opened the bottle and counted out the pills before picking the phone back up. "Mrs. -- Maggie -- the bottle is still full. She hasn't taken a single one." "I'm not surprised. She was reluctant to even take the prescription from him. I filled it for her while we did some shopping. She's so worried about doing anything that might harm the babies." "Well, she's not helping them by not eating and throwing up all the time." "I know, Fox, but I can remember being pregnant with my own and that feeling of protectiveness you get. I think, for Dana, there's an element of loss of control. Someone else takes over your body for nine months. Two someone else's in her case, and it can be a little scary trying to get used to it." He hadn't quite thought of it in those terms before, but it made sense. Scully loved her ordered world, and loved keeping it that way. It must be unsettling to have your body doing and feeling things you can't do anything about. And on top of all that were all those dire warnings about things you should and shouldn't do or eat or get near when you were pregnant. Heck, he didn't have a medical background and some of what he read scared the hell out of him. "Are you still there, Fox?" "Yeah, sorry. I was just thinking about what you said." "Fox, has she spoken to you at all, about any of this?" "Talked to me? No, not really. " "Fox, the two of you are a pair. I realize this isn't my place, but those are my grandbabies. I think the two of you have some things you need to work out. Dana should be able to talk to you about what's going on with her. And you should be the one supporting her right now. I'll help anyway I can Fox, you know that, I love you both. But there are some serious issues the two of you need to resolve. And --" He could hear over the line. "Here it is. I want to give you the doctor's phone number. I think if you have any questions you should call him. I also think you should go to her next appointment; you are the father after all. Do you have a pen?" "It's okay, I've got the number, Maggie." "Of course, I'd forgotten that you -- well, you know -- " God, he could feel himself turning red. "I know it's awkward --" "Oh Fox, you have no idea. I'm sorry, but this is so hard for me. In my day, you got married, and then you had your children. This whole situation is hard for someone my age to understand." "I realize it's not exactly traditional." She chuckled. "That's an understatement. But however or whatever, you're the father of those two little ones." "I know." And he did know. Sometimes he was overwhelmed with feelings: excitement, dread, fear, and panic to name a few. "Do you need me to come over? I can leave right away." "I think she's finally sleeping, so as soon as you can get here would be good." The relief must have been evident in his voice. "Don't worry, I know how she can get. I wouldn't leave you to take her on by yourself right now. I'll be there as soon as I can." He took the pills back out to the kitchen with him. He needed to keep himself busy. He was tempted to go in and wake her up and force her to take one of them right now, but knew that wouldn't get him anywhere, except sent home. He filled the sink and started on the dishes. "Mom? Mulder?" He turned to find Scully leaning against the wall. "Just me, Scully." God, she looked awful. He dried his hands and set the towel aside. "What are you doing up?" "Can't sleep." "Were you sick again?" He watched her face carefully. He didn't think she would lie straight out, but she was a master at ignoring and deflecting. "Who were you talking to?" "Your mom, and you didn't answer my question." "I'm fin --" "Don't say it. You need to be straight with me." He grabbed the pill bottle and shook it in front of her face. "Why haven't you taken these?" "Where did you get those?" He noticed her lip trembling and that she had grown even paler. He was too frustrated to let it temper his words. "Exactly where you left them." "You had no right to go through my things." "I had --" he set the bottle on the counter and stepped back, putting some space between them. "I had no right? Damn it, you couldn't even function properly today, Scully." "I can do my job just fine." "Fuck the job. I'm worried about your health and the health of the babies." He picked the bottle back up. Opening it he took one out and pushed it at her. "I want you to take this." "They're pills, Mulder." "I think I know what they are, Scully." "You don't get it. You're not supposed to have anything like that when you're pregnant." "You're not supposed to starve yourself, either. Damn it Scully, these are my babies too. You think I would want you to take anything that would be harmful? But your doctor wouldn't have prescribed these if he thought they were dangerous." He slammed the bottle back onto the counter, upsetting some of the contents. He had already said more than he wanted to, at least in the state he was in. He made his way to the front hall, nabbing his jacket and keys on the way. "Your mom should be here any minute now. I called her." "Mulder, wait." "Scully, I love you but I can't do this right now. I need to cool off. I'll call later, okay?" He missed the stunned look on her face, and the tears filling her eyes as he opened the door, nearly running over Maggie, who was poised to knock. "Fox?" "Maggie. Sorry, I didn't hear you there." "Are you leaving?" "I think it's best if I do right now." "What's going on?" "This isn't a good time." "Oh dear. Will we see you later?" "I don't know. Probably not." "Oh, Fox. I don't know what I'm going to do with the two of you." "I just need some space right now. Maybe you can talk some sense into her." Maggie sighed and patted his arm. "I'll let you know." "Good luck." ******* "Dana?" "I'm in here, Mom." She picked up the pills and dropped them back in the container. She didn't know whether she should scream or go throw up again. He was always dropping crap like that on her and then taking off, or throwing it out when he was half looped on Demerol. "Is everything all right?" "Just fine, Mom." She placed the pill bottle behind the coffee canister. "Dana," she admonished. "I want the truth." Her mom rounded the corner, overnight case still in her hand. She could tell her daughter had been crying, but was wise enough to ignore it. "Mom, I don't know how the hell you managed to do this four times. Once is enough to make me not want to do it again." "Afterwards, you forget all about the hard parts." She set the case down and took her coat off. "Why was Fox so upset?" "I don't want to talk about it." "How's the nausea? Are you feeling any better?" She stepped forward to feel her daughter's head. "You're so pale, Dana, and a little warm. Have you managed to keep any fluids down today? She held her hand up and counted with her fingers. "Let's see, one: Queasy. Number two: maybe a little better. And three: a little water." "There's no need to be smart about it. Do you think you could handle some soup?" "Chicken noodle?" "Whatever you'd like." "I think there's a package in here." She started to open the cupboard doors. "Dana, I'm sure I can find it. Why don't you get yourself cleaned up. Did you sleep in your suit?" "Yeah, I guess I did. A shower sounds good." "You go. The soup will be done when you get out." ******** Maggie watched Dana take small sips of the soup. Her daughter was still pale and far too thin but the shower seemed to perk her up a bit. Fox was right to be concerned. "How's it feeling on the stomach?" "I'm fine, mom." Maggie bristled. "You're always _fine_ Dana. You know it isn't a crime to admit that you don't feel well." "That isn't what I meant." "Dana, you haven't taken a single one of those pills your doctor gave you." "And how would you know that?" Maggie retrieved the pills from behind the canister. Four kids had taught her to be observant. "They're all here." "You told Mulder, didn't you?" "Dana, he's worried about you. We both are." "That still doesn't give him the right to go through my things and for the two of you to discuss it without me present." "He has as much right to be concerned about those babies as you do. He's the father, Dana. Or have you forgotten that?" "You don't need to keep reminding me, I haven't forgotten, Mom. And you know as well as I do that any kind of medicine --" "Dana, I was there when the doctor went through the information with you. He didn't expect you'd need to take them for very long, and I understood enough to know that they were relatively safe. You're not doing those babies any good when you can't eat." "God, Mom. You sound like Mulder." "Dana, you are having twins. Now, I realize it's been awhile since I've had babies, but I remember enough to know that it's hard enough managing one on your own, but two? When were you planning on talking to him; when you're delivering?" The miserable look on her daughter's face was quickly hidden. "There hasn't been time and anyway, I'm too tired to think." "You have to make time, Dana. Have you thought about taking some time off?" "I can't just quit." "No one said anything about quitting. And it would just be until you felt better." "I'd go crazy just sitting around, Mom. You know that. And I can't leave Mulder by himself. You don't know the kind of trouble he can get himself into." "Oh, I may have an idea or two. But that's beside the point. This is one of those things the two of you should be working out. What about after you have the babies, Dana? What then?" The sight of tears in her strong, independent daughter's eyes gave Maggie slight pause, but only for a moment. Unfortunately, the only way to deal with Dana when she was being this stubborn was to be firm, even if it hurt her. She should have insisted that Fox stay. She didn't want to meddle, in fact, she made it a point to stay out of her children's lives, but these two needed a firm shove in the right direction. They gave new meaning to the term strong and silent. "Honey, I know it's hard for you, but it's going to get harder," she handed Dana a tissue. "Don't cry." "I can't help it. Between the hormones and all the rest of it, my body feels like it's been taken over by those damn aliens we're always looking for." Maggie opened the pill bottle and shook one out. "I want you to take one of these. Don't look at me like that. I heard the doctor. If things didn't get better he was going to admit you. I will have him call if I need to. I want you to try one tonight and one tomorrow and see if it helps." She was somewhat relieved when her daughter sighed and nodded. She fetched a glass of water and handed the small white pill over. "Don't drink too much. With any luck you'll be able to eat a little something later on." "What time is it?" "It's still early, just after seven." She watched with a satisfied expression as Dana swallowed the pill. "Why don't I do a load of washing for you? You can sit and put your feet up and maybe take some time to think. There's still time to give Fox a call and ask him to come back." "Mom, please stay out of it. Okay? We both need to cool off right now. We'll get around to it on our own." Maggie sighed. It was probably the best she was going to get right now. "Go sit. I'll clean up in here and start the wash." She was relieved when Dana didn't argue with her. ********** As Scully dropped her laptop on her desk, she had to admit she did feel better today. Being able to eat the toast and oatmeal her mom made her this morning, and keep it down, was heavenly. When her mom set another one of the little white pills beside her with a glass of water she didn't argue. She was still hungry, but weeks of almost constant nausea had taken its toll. She was a little fearful about eating anything that would set her off again. She was sticking to bland food and small portions for the time being. "Scully? I thought you'd be taking the day off." "Why would I need the day off, Mulder?" She realized how defensive she sounded when she noticed him wince. "I'm sorry. That came out wrong." She left her desk to stand closer to him. "Thanks, for yesterday." "No worries. That's what partners do, right? Look out for one another?" Oh, this wasn't going how she planned it. She promised her mom she would try and talk to him. "Mulder -- about yesterday." He looked up, expectantly. "Yeah?" "I know I should have told you how sick I was feeling, and about the pills too. I just don't want you to think I can't do my job." "Can you, Scully?" "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" "I didn't mean it like that. It's just that you don't tell me what's going on with you and I'm left guessing. You scared me yesterday." She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. It's hard; my body feels like it isn't my own anymore." "Maybe because it's not? You've got tenants in there." She recognized his attempt to lighten the conversation with humor. "Yeah, and they're behind on the rent." "You look better today." "I feel better. Those little white pills." "You took them?" "Yes, but I'm still mad that you went through my stuff to find them." She held her hand up to stop him from commenting. "I know you were only concerned, but I wish you'd just ask me." "Scully, I'd ask if I thought you'd tell me, but you don't. Didn't I just say that?" "My mom thinks we need to talk." That was the safest way she could think to introduce the subject. "I know. She said the same thing to me." Scully sniffed the air. "Did you wear aftershave today?" "After yesterday, are you kidding?" "Thanks." "It's okay, Scully. What did she say to you?" "Oh, you know, the usual. I need to be more open, let people -- you and her -- help me more. How was I going to manage work with twins, and so on." "Well, how are we going to manage it?" She was pleased he used we, even if she wasn't able to yet. "Well --" "I know we haven't talked much about it, but I'd like to be there for you and the babies.... I didn't plan on just -- you know -- contributing genetic material. I want to be -- involved. Ah hell, I want to be a dad, Scully, and not just on the weekends." She wasn't sure quite how to take what he was saying, or how she should respond. Was he talking joint custody? Two days during the week and every other weekend? Or every other day - she had one friend whose parents shared custody of her in that manner. Stephanie hated it. She used to say she felt like she didn't belong anywhere. Or did he want to split the twins up and each take one? Like a modern day version of King Solomon's decree, only there were two children, not one to divide. Her brain felt like it was on overload. Why was it so hard for her to just tell him what she wanted, what she hoped for? "Scully? Are you still with me?" "Yeah, sorry. It's just that --" "Just what?" "I never know what I'm supposed to think when you say stuff like that." "Like what? The fact that I want to take responsibility for what we've created?" She sighed deeply and decided to stay on safe ground. "My mom thinks you should come to my appointments with me." "And what do you think?" "I think that'd be okay." It would be a start at any rate. Maybe they could start with this small step and work their way up to the bigger parts. "I'd like that." "Okay." "Good. Feel like doing some typing?" "Don't tell me you didn't finish the report." "You know me. Plus your explanations are always so much more --" "Plausible?" "That's a good word for it. Are we okay, Scully?" "We're okay." "When?" "Next Tuesday, four thirty. I get to drive, okay?" "Oh-- kay?" "While I still can. In a few months I doubt I'll be able to reach the pedals." He opened his mouth to respond but she was quicker. "Shut up and hand me the report, Mulder." ************* ************* TITLE: Great Expectations V: Scully's Choice AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: While on a case, Scully is faced with a difficult decision. * * * * * * * * * * * * The car was silent other than the hum of the engine and the crunch of gravel under the tires as we followed slowly behind the Sheriff's cruiser. The glow of our parking lights provided the only illumination for Mulder to carefully maneuver into the brush in front of the rural West Virginia property and pull to a stop only inches away from our lead vehicle. As usual, I had forgotten how dark the night could be away from city lights and without the glow of the moon. Normally, headlights would be helpful, but we were trying to approach the remote residence as inconspicuously as possible. "Too bad there isn't a full moon tonight, huh, Mulder?" "Nah, the reflection off the cars might...." It took him a moment, but he finally brought his attention away from our present task and acknowledged my gentle ribbing. "You can scoff all you want, Scully, but if we have these two in custody on the next full moon, everyone will see that I'm right." I just turned away to hide the smirk that I couldn't stifle and decided to let it go. Of course, only Mulder would conclude that the dog bites on the victims indicated one of our suspects to be a werewolf. Fortunately, the rest of the forensic evidence pointed clearly to the locally- notorious Crawford boys, so we were able to obtain a warrant. If Mulder wanted to continue in his little delusion, it wasn't hurting the rest of the case, so I didn't see the harm in indulging him. In the dim lighting, we could see that Sheriff Fredricks and his deputy had already disembarked and stepped off toward the house, so we quietly followed suit. Back at the station, we had already established our plan: the sheriff and deputy would knock at the front door to officially serve the warrant while Mulder and I circled around the back to keep an eye out in case the suspects bolted or backup was needed. Without conversation, Mulder took the lead, and I fell into step behind him, once again readjusting my Kevlar vest in a vain effort to find a more comfortable position. These things were designed for flat chests and large ribcages--in other words, for men, not for women. This time, at least, the awkward shape was a hidden blessing; or, should I say, it hid my blessing. Now that the persistent nausea had finally relented, I had started to gain weight and was rapidly pushing the limits of my current wardrobe. Unlike my form-fitting suits, the flatness of the Kevlar easily obscured my growing abdomen, relieving me from the self- conscious tugging at over-sized jackets or lab coats, if only for a few hours. The added benefits, however, did not make the thing any more comfortable to move around in. Advancing upon the house as quietly as we could, we navigated carefully through the thin foliage, working our way toward the back. Just as we passed the garage, a potent smell wafted toward me. At first, it didn't register in my mind but only nagged at it, trying to tell me something. A twig snapping under my foot demanded my attention, so I momentarily forgot the odor until we rounded the corner and a stiff breeze threw it back in my face, full force. I froze in my tracks. I knew immediately what that smell was, and what it could mean. A quick glance around located a pile of discarded canisters and boxes indiscreetly stacked by the trash cans, confirming my suspicions. However, if Mulder also detected the smell, he seemed oblivious. It would jeopardize our position to have a conversation here, but this was too important to let go. "Mulder!" I whispered just loud enough for him to hear. He turned back in my direction inquisitively, and I gestured for him to join me along the side of the garage, where there were no windows and we were thus less likely to be detected. He leaned in close to me, close enough that I could feel his hot breath on my cheek, so we could converse as quietly as possible. "Do you smell that?" He merely shrugged at me, remaining nonverbal for the moment. "It's ammonia." "If it's making you sick--" Bless the man for realizing that just about any smell could turn me off these days, but he was totally missing the point. I shook my head and waved a hand toward the trash cans while I jumped in to explain, "I think the Crawfords might have a meth lab inside." He followed my gesture and then turned back to me. "I guess that's not much of a surprise. Sheriff Fredricks said these guys have been implicated in all sorts of things." Then Mulder started to pull away, and I saw that he still didn't get it. I grabbed hold of his arm to stop him. "Exposure to meth labs is extremely hazardous. It's bad enough for adults to have even limited contact, but the effects on children are much worse." He was nodding along impatiently, eager to get to our post. "Then we'll be caref--" But I held on tight to his arm. "Mulder, if these chemicals get absorbed into my bloodstream...." As his eyes grew wide, I knew that my point had finally registered and I didn't need to finish my statement. "Get back to the car, Scully. I don't want you anywhere near this house." On any other occasion, hearing him bark a command like that would have irked me, but this time, he was simply stating plainly what I was already trying to communicate. But still, I hesitated. "What if they run? I can just stay out here--" "We'll be fine. We have them outnumbered, three to two. Just keep a lookout, and if anything goes wrong, get on the sheriff's radio and call for backup." "But--" "Go!" Without waiting for my response, he disappeared around the corner. We had already wasted too much time arguing and possibly compromised the entire situation. And I knew he was right. I hated this, but I knew he was right. Peeking carefully around the front of the garage, I made sure I was clear before quietly trotting back to the cars. I didn't get inside, though, because I knew I wouldn't have a clear view of the house. Instead, I took cover in some bushes, and waited. At first, there was nothing but silence. Too much silence. I had no idea what was going on inside and nothing but my own churning thoughts to preoccupy me. I hated this whole situation. I hated having to make a choice between my unborn children and my partner. I hated not being able to carry out my job. I hated sending Mulder off into the unknown without being able to watch his back. And I really hated just sitting here and waiting. Unfortunately, the silence didn't last: gunshots rang out. My first instinct was to draw my weapon and head for the house, and I got as far as the next bush before I hesitated and dropped back into hiding. There had been four shots, maybe five, but they had ended as abruptly as they began. I had no idea what the situation was, and it was killing me. Could I risk going inside, even for a moment? What if Mulder was hurt? But, what if he wasn't? What if they already had everything under control? Was it worth the risk to find out? I was just about to head back to the sheriff's cruiser to call for reinforcements when someone finally emerged from the house. I sighed in relief and rose from my lookout as I recognized the silhouetted form. It was Mulder. "We need to call for an EMT. Luke's in custody, but Ralph got himself shot. Deputy Hansen's trying to stop the bleeding." In the darkness, I couldn't discern whether Mulder himself had received any injuries. Eager to check him for wounds, I pulled out my pocket flashlight and stayed put until he caught up with me, thankfully seeing no blood as he stepped into the small circle of light. We were just turning to head for the car when the sheriff exited. "Agent Mulder, don't bother. He's a goner. I'll call the coroner instead." As he continued to approach his vehicle, he came into my line of sight, which until then had been obscured by Mulder's larger frame. The sheriff didn't pause as he passed, but that didn't slow him down in other regards. "Well, Miss Scully, nice of you to join us. Next time we need backup, I'll be sure to send you an engraved invitation." I felt my stomach turn over, but this time, it had nothing to do with being pregnant. I'd faced my share of chauvinists over the years, but in the past, they'd never been right. Tonight, however, I had shirked my duty and abandoned my partner, and there was nothing to say in my defense. The bastard was right. I finally pulled my eyes away from the retreating figure and, out of habit, turned to Mulder. He just shook his head at me, indicating that I shouldn't let the sheriff's words bother me. But how could I ignore the truth? A man had died tonight--what if my presence would've changed things? What kind of federal agent was I if all I could do was sit back and watch? * * * * * * * * * * * * The ride back to the police station was a quiet one. I filled Scully in on what had happened inside the house, but she said nothing in response. I wasn't even sure that she was really listening. I figured she was probably stewing over the sheriff's sarcastic retort, so I decided it was better to leave her be. But I didn't care what the jerk had to say about it. If our babies were in danger, their lives took precedence over two suspected murderers. There was only one right choice, and Scully had made it. The deputy had stayed behind at the house to wait for the coroner and, on Scully's insistence, a hazmat team, but the sheriff had gone on ahead with the suspect and must have been off processing him when we arrived. It was late, and Scully and I were both exhausted from a long day, so we only intended to pick up our stuff and head back to the motel. I was hoping we could be in and out before the sheriff made an appearance, but no such luck. We were in the back room returning our Kevlar when the stocky man made his entrance. "Well, sweetheart, you certainly didn't need that tonight, now did ya?" Some guys just don't value their balls. Scully was standing between me and the sheriff, facing him, and thus with her back to me, so I couldn't see her facial expression, but I knew from experience what it would be. Regardless of our choice for her to remain outside tonight, the sheriff's condescending attitude was completely uncalled for, and I knew from Scully's silence that he had already gotten under her skin. I leaned back on the locker behind me, waiting for the fireworks to begin. I had never admitted it to my partner (since I valued my *own* balls), but one of my favorite pastimes was watching her rip some guy a new one after he dared to make sexist remarks to her face. It happened far too often in our line of work, which gave her plenty of opportunities to shine. Sheriff Fredricks, however, just didn't know when to stop. "I suppose you just came along tonight for moral support, huh? It's kinda hard for you to provide backup when you're hidin' in the car. Maybe next time you should just stay behind, or else we might have to rescue ya. Someone might think a pretty little thing like you'd make a good hostage." He was really asking for it, and the fact that Scully had remained silent for so long told me she was really brewing up a storm. This one was going to be good. But what happened next confused the hell out of me. I heard a sniffle. I looked down at Scully, still only seeing the back of her head from this position, and watched as she stiffened her spine and then make a beeline for the door. All I could do was just stare at the empty doorway as she disappeared down the hall. I was too stunned to move. "No place for cryin' in law enforcement. That's why you'll never see a woman on my force. Keep 'em where they belong, behind a desk--or on top of it." Now my attention was drawn away from the door. The prick even had the audacity to snicker at his own "joke." I was seeing red, and it took every ounce of resolve that I had not to do what came naturally and drive my fist right into his smug little face. But I knew Scully wouldn't be happy with me, and she was my first concern right now. If I didn't get out of there posthaste, however, I wouldn't be able to stop myself. So I focused my attention on my partner and set out to find her. I exited just in time to see her disappear through a door at the other end of the hallway, which I discovered, upon approaching it, to be the women's restroom. I hesitated for a moment, not sure how to handle this, but at the muffled sound of a stifled sob, I took action, knocking as I cracked open the door. It was late, and there weren't many women around this place anyway, but I didn't want to press my luck and just barge in. "Scully?" "Just a minute, Mulder. I'll be right out." I could tell from her tone that she was trying to hide her tears and sound impassive, but she wasn't fooling me. I decided if there were any other women in there, they were probably concealed within stalls anyway, so I would take my chances. Scully heard me coming and pulled back from the sink. At first, I was concerned that she might have been throwing up again, even though the nausea had finally begun to let up once she listened to her doctor. But as I caught her discreetly swiping at her eyes, I realized that she was just trying to erase the evidence of her tears. It was her reddened eyes and tear-stained cheeks that were my undoing. "This is the women's bathroom. You can't just--" But the remainder of her rebuke was muted by my chest when I closed the distance, wrapped my arms around her, and held her tight. She resisted, as I knew she would, but I didn't release my hold. "Mulder, this isn't the place. We can't--" "It's okay, Scully," I crooned into her ear. "You did the right thing tonight. Don't let that guy get to you." I felt the fight drain from her as she sagged in my arms, leaning her head against my chest in defeat. "But he was right. That bastard was right." The floodgates finally opened and the tears were no longer held in check, and though I was pained to hear her cry like this, I was also relieved. Honestly, I was still a bit confused about what had happened back there and why she reacted in this unprecedented way, but I could only guess that it had something to do with the pregnancy. It was hard enough for me to read her emotions before all this, but now with the added hormones, the old rulebook was out. On more days than not, she left me wondering whether I should scratch my watch or wind my ass. Yet what was almost as surprising, once I thought about it, was my own reaction. Since when did I go running after my partner to demand hugs from her, in the women's bathroom of all places? At least she had the excuse of the extra hormones; what was my excuse for suddenly becoming so overprotective--sympathy hormones? Maybe this is why she had such a hard time letting me in and letting me be involved. She was probably afraid that I would start treating her differently, no longer as my equal but as a damsel in distress. But all of this was just as new to me as it was to her. We were both just trying to figure this out as we went along. I noticed Scully's sobs begin to slow, bringing my thoughts away from myself, and I finally felt her arms reach around my waist to return my embrace. "I was a liability to you tonight. I couldn't cover you properly, and that put everyone in jeopardy. I can't do my job anymore." Her voice cracked on the last word, and I knew she was struggling not to start crying again. "Nonsense. I still need you on this case. There's a body to be examined, and I need you in that autopsy bay to find out the truth." She sighed and started to pull away, but I didn't release her yet; thankfully, she didn't protest. "I don't need to examine him to tell you he's not a--" I knew what she was going to say and jumped in before she could finish. "Then prove it." This earned me an indulgent look and half a smile. At least that was something. But the smile quickly faded. "I love my job, Mulder. I don't want to give it up. And I don't want to abandon you." Still keeping one arm wrapped around her, I lifted a hand to stroke some strands of dampened hair from her face, pleased when she didn't lean away from my touch. "Our priorities have changed, partner. Someone else needs you more than I do now--two little someones, in fact. I hate to say this, but any agent or cop with a gun can protect me almost as well as you can. But you're the only one who can protect these two." I nodded downward to indicate her belly. "And *nothing*--especially not this case--is worth risking their lives or health." Her head fell against my chest again, muffling her words. "I know. But it's just so hard...." Her words trailed off into a hitched sigh. From my perspective, it was difficult to fully understand what was so complicated about this. Obviously, these children that we thought we could never have were to be protected at all costs. But I knew that I couldn't judge Scully for her mixed feelings. This was her body, not mine, that was undergoing so many changes. She was the one who inevitably had to make the sacrifices and concessions. All I could really do, for the most part, was stand by and watch. Wrapped up as we were in our conversation, neither of us noticed the click of approaching heels until they were accompanied by the squeak of hinges. I turned at the noise and briefly caught the startled face of the sheriff's secretary and her mumbled, "Excuse me," before she disappeared back the way she came. I felt Scully stiffen and looked down to meet her startled gaze. In our shock, there was a momentary delay as we both registered how our current position must have looked to an outsider, and then we hastily pulled apart. She turned toward the mirror and immediately began to straighten her appearance. "Why don't you go start the car? I'll be there in a minute." Case closed, end of discussion. I had been dismissed. * * * * * * * * * * * * The rest of the week following the arrest of the Crawfords had been uneventful, for which both partners were grateful. Scully had found no conclusive evidence that Ralph Crawford was indeed a werewolf, but she did find some genetic anomalies, which Mulder took to be proof of his theory. That detail remained unexplained, however, and the case was filed away, like so many other X-Files, with results but without complete closure. Their first Monday back in the office was met with an urgent request (i.e., a direct order) from Skinner to stop by his office as soon as they got in. The pair speculated on what recent follies may have prompted this invitation while they headed up to their superior's office to meet their fate. Once they were admitted into his inner office, Skinner waited until both agents were seated before he spoke. "Is there anything you'd like to tell me about your case in West Virginia last week? The partners shared an uneasy look. They had said nothing to their boss about their decision for Scully to avoid the meth lab, and it seemed that the information had now caught up with them. The problem was, they still hadn't told Skinner about the pregnancy, nor had they really discussed when to reveal this information. Scully softly cleared her throat and spoke up. "Is there a problem, sir?" Skinner sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose before responding. "I received a complaint from Sheriff Fredricks that two of my agents were found engaging in... inappropriate activity...in a public restroom while on a case. Would you care to explain this to me?" Both agents had been so concerned with the event that precipitated this "indiscretion" that they had forgotten about it until now. Mulder looked to Scully for her reaction, but she kept her gaze trained on Skinner, quite obviously avoiding making eye contact with her partner. Her spine remained stiff, and she summoned all the dignity she could muster as she replied: "Sir, I'd had a particularly difficult day, and Agent Mulder was simply offering his support. The choice of location was unfortunate, but there was nothing inappropriate going on. A secretary or someone walked in on us, and she must have blown the story out of proportion." "More likely the sheriff blew it out of proportion," Mulder contributed. "That man didn't take much of a liking to us, and I have to say that the feeling's mutual." He hesitated a moment and then added, "Is that the only allegation he made against us?" Skinner considered his agent before answering. "No. He also made several sexist accusations, which I assumed to be baseless. Is there anything more I should know about this situation that might shed some light on his comments?" Mulder squirmed in his chair and shot a glance back toward his partner, whose eyes were now fixed on her hands in her lap. When his gaze followed her own, he couldn't help but pause at her abdomen. The loose-fitting jacket barely managed to keep her secret hidden from unobservant eyes. They suspected that several other people around the Hoover building already knew. How much longer could they really keep this information to themselves? Failing to get Scully's attention, Mulder addressed their boss. "Sir, would you mind if Scully and I stepped out for a moment?" "So you can get your stories straight? Yes, as a matter of fact, I do mind. There's obviously something going on here, and I'd really like to know what it is." He turned to the more likely source of a straight answer: "Agent Scully?" Rather than respond immediately, she turned her head to the side and slowly brought her eyes up to meet Mulder's. Though no words passed between them, she could read his expression: he would defer to her to break the news, but if she didn't, he would. They both knew it would come out sooner or later, and fate seemed to determine that now was the time. Scully dropped her eyes again and took a deep breath before proceeding. "Sir, I'm...I'm pregnant." Skinner was apparently not expecting this confession. He looked from one agent to the other, as though trying to process the information. "I thought you couldn't.... I'm sorry, that's none of my business. I guess congratulations are in order." "Uh, thank you, sir." There was an awkward silence while they all tried to determine where next to proceed. After a moment, Skinner hesitantly added, "I appreciate your candor, but I'm afraid that doesn't exactly clarify the situation for me." She hastened to explain to him, as succinctly as possible, their encounter with the meth lab and her uncharacteristic emotional response. Skinner seemed to weigh this information before replying. "Will you be requesting a leave of absence?" "Eventually, yes, I'll be taking maternity leave, but it's still a bit early for that." Skinner took a deep breath and then lowered his tone as he spoke, clearly wanting his words to come across as gently as possible. "Agent Scully, you know it's my job to be concerned about the safety and well-being of my agents. I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but do you really think you belong in the field right now?" Before she had a chance to react, Mulder jumped in. "Sir, we've already discussed these concerns, and while it's true that Scully will need to reduce her risks, the fact is that I need her with me in the field, as much more than just backup. The pregnancy in no way prohibits her from performing her duties in the autopsy bay or providing her usual scientific analysis." The set of his shoulders added an unspoken, *I won't let anything happen to her,* that lingered in the air. When he finished speaking, Mulder looked over at Scully with a determination that emphasized he'd support her on this issue, despite his own misgivings about her remaining in the field. With a barely discernible smile but a look that spoke volumes, she conveyed her thanks, and then both agents turned their attention back to Skinner to await his reaction. "Well, then, I guess I'll trust you two to make the right decisions as the circumstances dictate. But if there's anything you need, please don't hesitate to call me." He picked up the letter in front of him and brandished it. "Especially the next time you run into a Sheriff Fredricks. It's easier to clean up these messes *before* they turn into paperwork." "Does that mean you'll take care of it?" Mulder asked hopefully. Skinner chuffed out a mirthless laugh. "Don't I always?" Scully decided that was her cue to hasten her partner out of Skinner's presence before any discussion of past "messes" arose. She quickly stood, and Mulder followed her example. Taking a step toward the desk, she graced their boss with a grateful smile. "Thank you, sir." Following along behind her as they made their way past the desk and toward the door, Mulder also nodded his appreciation to their boss. Skinner gave half a nod in response, but once they had passed, it turned into a shake of the head. These two and the things they got themselves into.... After the agents departed, with Mulder's hand lingering possessively on his partner's back, Kim passed through the open door to deposit some forms on Skinner's desk. He mumbled his thanks but was still too lost in his thoughts to notice that she remained standing there. "So?" Surprised at her continued presence, he looked up abruptly. Catching her knowing smile, he rapidly restored his professional persona and turned his attention to the papers on his desk before responding. "I've told you how I feel about office rumors." "I just thought maybe you'd gained some insight on the question of paternity." "You know that's none of our business." To her credit, Kim dropped the fishing expedition and accepted his dismissal. Once the door was closed, Skinner leaned back in his chair and sighed, removing his glasses as he once again contemplated his most high-maintenance pair of agents. Because of Scully's abduction and cancer, he'd been privy to enough details about her infertility that he was baffled by this latest development. He'd heard the recent rumors, but he hadn't truly been willing to believe them until he received the news directly. Although Scully hadn't elaborated on how this was possible, it was hard not to speculate on the whys and hows. As he'd told his assistant, however, this was really nobody's business but Scully's. But what he hadn't told Kim was that he already had fifty bucks riding on Mulder--and he was about to make that a hundred. ********** ********** Title: Great Expectations 6: They Replaced My Partner With a Shopping Clone Author: Emily Sim *************** "Would you sit down, you're making me crazy." "Sorry." Mulder stopped his pacing and took the seat next to her. The waiting room was filled with women -- pregnant women of all shapes and sizes. It was a little unnerving. "How much longer, Scully?" She glanced at her watch. "Soon. I hope. I'm going to need a bathroom again if they don't hurry." She laid her hand on his leg to stop the tapping. ************ "Dana Scully? You can come in now." When Mulder stood to accompany her she halted his progress with a hand to his chest. "Not you." "Hey, I thought we were going to be sharing this experience." "They can call you after I'm changed." "It's not like I've never--" "Mulder!" She hissed his name and at his puzzled look indicated the rest of the office. He grinned sheepishly and sat back down. There were sympathetic glances from the men and at least one of the women. He felt a little like a fish out of water. He picked up the first magazine he found and hid behind it. He was deeply into an article concerning pregnancy and Omega 3 when he was summoned into the exam room. "Hey, Scully, did you know -- oh God." It was the first time he'd seen her pregnant belly -- her naked pregnant belly -- all of it. He was used to seeing a small bulge, but with her propensity for trying to keep it hidden, he'd never been able to gauge how big she actually was. And she was. Big, that is. Not that he had anything to compare it to. It took his breath away. He couldn't help himself. Setting the magazine on the chair he ran his hands over the taut skin. It was smooth, soft, and -- what the hell? Rolling? He laughed as the babies caused a ripple effect that could be seen as well as felt. He was in awe. He was in love. "Scully, they're moving." "Yeah, they've been active this morning." She attempted to pull the sheet up a bit and he could see the blush spread along her neck. He knew she felt exposed, lying with her feet still in the stirrups. The nurse had admitted Mulder before she had a chance to rearrange herself and Scully hated to be less than composed. He focused his attention completely on the antics of the twins while she adjusted her gown, hoping it would help relax her. The door opened admitting a technician. "Here we go." She seemed to notice Mulder at the same time. "Dad, I presume?" Mulder reluctantly removed his hands from his partner's stomach. "Yeah, Fox Mulder, Scu -- Dana's partner." "Well, Fox, I'm Susan Jamison and I'll be doing the sonogram today. I'm going to get this set up and then we'll be all ready to go. Do you have any questions before we start?" She squeezed the gel onto Scully's abdomen. "It's a little on the cold side, sorry." "Do you know who'll be reading the results?" Mulder could hear the anxiety in her voice. "I can check that for you. Just give me a sec." Susan quickly wiped her hands off and left the room. "What is that stuff?" Mulder dipped his fingers into it. "Mulder, don't." She couldn't reach to slap his hands away. "It's just a gel. It eliminates air between the probe and my skin." "A probe? Oooo, is that like an alien probe, Agent Scully?" "Behave or I won't invite you next time. And do you always have to stick your fingers in everything?" The door opened and the sonographer entered, ending any further comments Mulder might have had. "Doctor Marks will be looking over your results this morning, is that okay?" She set a clipboard on the counter. "That's fine. He did the last one." "We try to have the same doctor look over the results, especially with multiples. Familiarity with the file helps in case something comes up that needs attention. You should be a little more comfortable this time; not having to drink all that water." Scully chuckled. "I think that was the worst part." "That can't be any worse than you needing to have a bathroom within--" "Shut up, Mulder." "Dad, if you could move over just a little to your left there -- that's good. You'll both be able to see. The same drill as last time, okay Dana? Just relax and after I'm done I'll ask you to wait for a few minutes just in case we need another picture. Any more questions?" "No, we're good." Scully answered for both of them. Susan dimmed the lights and slipped the plastic cover onto the probe and began to run it slowly across Scully's abdomen. A grainy image could be seen on the small screen. She reached across and flipped a switch and the room was filled with the watery sounds of the babies' heartbeats. Mulder was mesmerized. It suddenly seemed so real. Up until this point Scully's pregnancy was something she was handling. He managed every once in a while to weasel his way in, but he mostly felt like his involvement didn't include bragging rights. But listening to them now, their heartbeats in sync with one another, filling the small room with their rhythm, he made a silent commitment to himself and to her. He wouldn't be satisfied sitting on the sidelines any longer. "Dad?" It took him a moment to realize that Susan had been trying to get his attention. "Sorry. It's just so -- amazing. Hearing them." "Yes, it is. And if you look here," she pointed to a spot on the screen, "you can see one baby's head and this --" her hand moved lower on the screen, "is a foot." Mulder moved closer to where she was tracing the outline of one twin. "Is that --"? "One of the babies is sucking his thumb." "His?" "That would be the universal 'his.' The other twin seems to be hiding behind this one. Come on little one. Ah, there we go. Can you see that?" She pointed to another spot. "There's the second baby's hand and --" she moved the probe around "there, another foot." She was silent for a few moments as she observed the twins. "Everything looks good. I'm just going to take some measurements and we'll be done." "Measurements?" Mulder shoved his hands back in his pockets. "Yes. Right now I'm measuring the circumference of both the babies' heads, --" she moved the probe around until it was focused on the second baby, "and here's baby number two." "How do you keep them straight?" "Practice." "What are you checking now?" Scully groaned. "I thought you read the book, Mulder." "Not this part." "It's okay, Dana, I'm happy to answer all your questions. I'll be looking at the length of the femur, the heart valves, the spinal area, the amount of amniotic fluid, and we take a reading on the heart rate. Together, all the information will let us know if things are developing normally." "How is their development?" Mulder detected the note of concern in Scully's voice. He knew she still fretted over having to take the anti-nausea medication. "Things look really good. Both twins are a good size for their gestational age. I can't see anything that would concern me." "Nothing?" "Nothing. The heartbeats are strong and see here?" She ran her finger down a longer white line. "This is one spinal column, and if I can get this little one to cooperate I'll show you the other. There we go. They both look just fine. I think--" she paused, "we may have fused placentas. Yes, we do. Not uncommon with this kind of conception, perfectly normal. It's placed well out of the way, so no worries there. I almost prefer to see this with multiples, less chance of a cord ending up around one twin's neck, or getting caught between the babies as they grow." "Maybe you could get them to sleep a little more." "I take it that they're an active pair?" "You have no idea. I don't know how there could be space in there." "Be thankful for it. In a few weeks things are going to get a little crowded." Scully groaned and Mulder chuckled. "Yeah, you laugh now G- man, you just wait until I can't go two feet without needing a bathroom." "You can hardly go a block now without needing one." "Did you want to know the sex?" "Yes." "No." "No, Scully? Don't we have enough surprises in our life?" "I'd like to think about it before I decide." "That's something you can work out later. You'll be back for a few more ultrasounds before delivery." She turned the machine off and gave Scully's abdomen a swipe as she moved the probe away. "Any more questions?" "Can I have a picture?" Mulder kept his eyes fixed on the screen where the last image was frozen. "Of course you can. I'll print one off and leave it at the desk for you. Dana, you can get changed now, but just hold off a minute or two before using the restroom." "Thanks, Susan." "Yeah, thanks." Mulder echoed. The door closed behind her and Mulder turned to his partner. "We decide." "What?" "The sex. Before _we_ decide." "Oh. Sorry. I didn't think...." "Need any help?" "What?" He waited half a beat until she caught his leer and he knew she would have thrown something at him if she weren't so worried about moving and exposing more of her body to him, or peeing on the table. "Go, get out while I change." "Hey, you might need me." "I think I can get changed just fine on my own." "Yes, but I know where the closest bathroom is." ************ "Mulder, you're going the wrong way. Mulder?" "Babies 'R Us, Scully." "We're going to be late." "You want to hit The Baby Room first instead?" "Work? Skinner? The Anderson report? Any of these ringing bells for you?" "Or would you rather we tried that new place over by the Georgetown Park Mall? I think it's a Baby's World." "Right, and we just call Skinner and tell him we decided to -- what? Skip work to shop?" "Done." She turned and had a good look at her partner. He had a white knuckled grip on the steering wheel, his eyes were glazed over, and a silly grin seemed to split his face. And he was humming. He was humming 'Rock a Bye Baby.' She groaned. "What did you tell him?" "Does it matter? It's done. We're off. We're shopping." "It matters to me." "Hungry? We could stop at the Georgetown Deli." Her stomach chose that moment to grumble. She hadn't been able to eat much before the ultrasound. "Bonnie and Clyde are hungry." "Bonnie and Clyde?" "You'd rather Abbott and Costello? Cheech and Chong? Laurel and Hardy?" She dropped her head into her hands. "Are you going to be like this for the next three months?" "Oh Scully, you haven't seen anything yet." ******* Indeed, Scully had never seen anything quite like it. She didn't have much to compare it to, having never been shopping with her partner before, so she couldn't be entirely sure that this was his normal routine. She couldn't keep up. She had already talked him out of buying two complete sets of baby furniture on the pretense that she wasn't sure what color scheme or style she was doing the room in. It was the only thing that had convinced him to put away his Amex card. Ditto for the high chairs, playpens, and 'saucers'. The man was a magnet for every female in the place. The older clerks bestowed fond, knowing smiles on him, but the younger ones -- she'd found herself nearly growling at one nubile young thing. This one took great delight in throwing her hair back as she thrust her chest out, and bringing her hands back to her tiny little waist as if to emphasize the difference in size between the two women. Hell, what was she supposed to look like? She was pregnant, it was a baby store, and Mulder was hers. She had left her post behind the shopping cart to stand close enough to Mulder to ensure Miss Perky got the message. But that was the only time she felt it was safe to leave the cart. The cart became the focal point of her existence in the store. She got caught up, just a little -- okay, more than a little if she was going to be honest with herself -- looking at all the cute baby things. That was her first mistake, looking away from the cart. Her second mistake was to pick something up and admire it. It was all of two minutes, tops, but when she turned back to the cart it was full. She was convinced Mulder wasn't even looking at what he was buying. Some clerk would come up to him and hold out some sleeper or romper set and he would just toss it in and ask for a second one. They caught on really quickly that he was shopping for twins. Then came the peripherals: things like monitors, mobiles, and breast pumps. The breast pump was embarrassing. Used to having two of everything, he demanded two of those as well, not really knowing what he was getting. If the explanation detailing what it did wasn't bad enough, there was the whole loud -- Mulder was a loud shopper -- discussion of her two breasts and how much time it might save having a pump for each. She wanted the floor to open up and swallow her whole. It was when she finally pinned him against the back wall in the 0 to 12 month toy aisle that she got his attention. "You have to stop." "But, why?" He seemed truly confused. "Space." It was the first thing that came to her. He looked back to the cart, which was haphazardly parked in the middle of the aisle. "There is still plenty of space in the cart." "My apartment. No space in my apartment." "Oh. That will be a problem, won't it?" She watched as his expression changed from puzzled to -- oh no, she was seeing his 'I've got a brilliant idea face.' "No." His smile widened. "I said, no. Whatever it is." He was ignoring her and now he looked positively smug. "What's going on in that head of yours, Mulder?" "Oh, just an idea or two." "Mulder?" "We keep the two Knicks outfits." "Deal." "And these." She watched him pull two Fisher Price stacking rings off the shelf. "Okay." "And --" "No. No more. Just put those in so we can go." She watched him drop them in the cart, which was only half full now, thanks to her quick moves, and then turn back to the shelf. "Scully, it's a Baby-Tap-a-Tune Piano." "I don't care if it's a baby grand." She shot him a warning look, as he was about to open his mouth. "My back hurts and I have to pee." "But--" "Never argue with a pregnant woman, Mulder" *************** *************** TITLE: Great Expectations VII: Three Wise Guys AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: It's time to break the news to the Lone Gunmen, but they have a little surprise of their own. * * * Letting the catalog slip from her hand to the coffee table below, Scully raised her arms to stretch, inadvertently releasing a yawn. It was only early evening, but her energy was quickly waning. The larger her mid-section grew, the more uncomfortable she became, making it more and more difficult to sleep through the night. But she seldom had the liberty to compensate with catnaps, so it didn't take long for the exhaustion to catch up with her. She figured that it was nature's cruel way of preparing her for the months of sleepless nights to come. No sooner had she leaned back on the couch and closed her eyes than a knock reverberated on the front door. Scully sighed and then struggled awkwardly to her feet, slowly making her way across the room. She figured that her visitor was one of two people, but her mother tended to call first. Without bothering to check the peephole, she pulled open the door. "Mulder." His mouth opened to greet her, but he got sidetracked when he noticed what she was wearing. "Is that my shirt?" "Oh, uh, yeah." She looked down self-consciously and then stepped back to give him room to enter. "All of my t-shirts are too small now. You don't mind, do you?" He hung up his jacket on the coat rack while he answered her. "No, but I was wondering where it went to." She decided to change the subject before he asked about any other items of clothing that had recently gone missing. "So, what's up?" "I just came by to see if you wanted to go to a movie or something." She gaped at him as if he had just sprouted a second head. "What, no case files or fifty-year-old news clippings about UFO sightings to dig through?" He smirked at her. "All work and no play makes Fox a dull boy." She smiled at his joke. "Well, I truly appreciate the offer, but I'll have to take a rain check. I don't really feel like going out tonight." As he moved further into her living room, Mulder caught his first glimpse of the magazines and paint samples spread out over the coffee table. "What's all this?" She followed him over to the table where he stopped to peruse the display. "Oh, I was looking over some designs for the nursery." Picking up a catalog that lay open to a zoo animal theme, Mulder held her place while he flipped through the glossy pages to check out the other options. Scully reached down for a couple of the paint samples. "Most of the designs are in pastels, but I'm not quite sure that's what I want. Some of the animal patterns seem to have a little more color." "Oh, Scully, this is it!" She was immediately wary of his enthusiasm. He turned the book so she could see the page he held open: Marvin the Martian. "No, Mulder. I can't even believe they have that in there." "Do you think they have Elvis? We could decorate the room like Graceland." "I'm not even going to dignify that with a response." He grinned at her and set down the catalog to reach for the paint swatches in her hand. "I've got some more in here." She pointed toward the spare room and started walking that way, with Mulder distractedly following a few steps behind while he sifted through the colored cards. When they entered the room, Scully toed aside a stuffed animal that had escaped from the pile of baby paraphernalia along the wall. Most of it was Mulder's booty from his shopping spree, but the pile mysteriously seemed to grow larger every time she checked on it. Whenever she interrogated her partner about it, however, he played innocent, so eventually she had stopped trying. Picking up a couple of paint samples from a shelf, Scully walked back over and showed them to him. "I really like this one, but this one," she pointed to another, "goes better with the trim on the door and the baseboards, so I wouldn't have to repaint them." His puzzled look wasn't what she expected. "You're planning to paint in here?" Confused by his reaction, she was slow in responding. "Well, yeah. I thought I should do it now while I can still stand on a stepladder. Why, what's wrong with that?" "I don't know, it just seems so...permanent." She paused a beat and then echoed, "Permanent?" "Well, you know, this place isn't really big enough for the four of us. I kind of thought we should look for something bigger." "The four of us?" "Yeah. The last time I counted, two plus two made four." "You want us to live together?" He was a little frustrated by her surprise at what seemed to him the next logical step. "Well, it would be kind of hard for me to help out with two a.m. feedings from the other side of town." She just stared at him for a moment, her brow furrowed and her mouth moving noiselessly until she finally found her voice. "Mulder, that just seems so...sudden." "Sudden?" He tossed aside the paint samples, freeing his hands to settle on his hips. "How exactly did you think we were going to raise these children together?" A shrill ring echoed through the apartment, and they both jumped a little at the unexpected sound. Scully, for one, was grateful for the phone's interruption and swiftly fled the room to answer it. "Scully." "Ah, my favorite G-woman. And how are you this evening?" She sighed. "Hi, Frohike. I'm fine. Are you looking for Mulder?" "Actually, I was looking for both of you. We were hoping you two could swing by our place tonight." "I'm not really in the mood to look at UFO data." "No aliens involved, I promise--well, unless you count Langly." She shook her head at his joke and then glanced back at her partner. Before his arrival, she had really been hoping to spend the evening at home, maybe in a nice, warm bath, and then head for bed early. But she could tell by the look on his face as he stood in the doorway watching her that he wasn't ready to let their conversation drop. It appeared that her best alternative was to take up the Gunmen on their offer. She turned away from Mulder's piercing gaze to give her answer. "Okay, we'll be over in a little bit." "As always, I look forward to the pleasure of your company." She rolled her eyes and then hung up the phone. Turning back to Mulder, she explained to him, "The guys want us to come over. I'll just go change." Without even waiting for his response, she made a beeline for the bedroom and shut the door firmly behind her. As Scully stood at her closet, sifting through her limited maternity offerings, her mind was not on her task but back in the other room with Mulder. She wasn't sure how to answer his question, or even why she was so resistant to the idea of sharing a place with him. It just felt like everything in her life was changing so fast, and she needed something stable to hold on to. Bringing two new babies into her home was going to be enough of an adjustment, but trying to live with Mulder, too? She didn't know if she could handle it. Not to mention the difficulty of how undefined their relationship still was. They were partners and now co-parents, but did that necessarily make them anything more? The mere thought of it all was too overwhelming, so Scully decided to push her thoughts aside and reached for a blue maternity blouse hanging in front of her. It was still a bit large for her and therefore made her look bigger than she really was, but the cat was already out of the bag with most people. She wasn't sure if Mulder had broken the news to the Gunmen yet, but if he hadn't, what better way to announce it than to walk in looking quite obviously pregnant? She couldn't wait to see the look on Frohike's face. *********** As it turned out, Scully was the one who was taken by surprise when they walked through the door of the Lone Gunmen's lair. The first thing she spotted upon entering was the banner of pastel baby-block letters that spelled out "Congratulations." The ends of the banner were accented with pink and blue balloons--and that was just the beginning. She turned back to look up at Mulder, who was also agape at the decorations. "Did you put them up to this?" His hands flew up in a gesture of self-defense. "Don't look at me. I swear I didn't know anything about it." Finally finished locking the door behind them, Frohike returned and escorted the pair to a table along the side of the room. Pink and blue streamers were draped across the top and dangling from the sides, framing the two unrecognizable gadgets that sat in the middle of the table, each sporting a large bow. "Sorry we didn't get around to wrapping them first, but we thought you wouldn't mind." Scully wasn't quite sure how to respond. "Um, thank you?" With barely contained enthusiasm, Frohike hastened over to the table and picked up one of the devices. "I like to call this the Lullaby 2000. It uses the latest in virtual reality technology to soothe a baby back to sleep. You see, you attach this to the side of the crib." He pointed out a clamp at the base of a metallic arm. "It's voice activated, so when the baby starts crying, this viewer descends"--he showed them a pair of VR goggles--"and the program initiates. Then, this arm inserts the pacifier. Or, if you prefer, a bottle." Mulder reached for the goggles. "What exactly is this 'program'?" As he held them up to his eyes, Frohike pushed a button to activate the images. Mulder immediately started to laugh. "You pulled this from one of your videos, didn't you?" Now Scully was suspicious. "What?" He handed over the goggles, and she looked at him warily before holding them up to her eyes. Then he pushed the same button that Frohike had. Scully gasped in shock at the image of a 3-D (which could also describe the cup size) bare breast coming straight at her. She quickly pulled the viewer away. "Frohike! What *is* this?" He looked surprised by her reaction, and a little hurt. "It convinces the baby he's nursing, so you don't have to get up in the middle of the night." Mulder reached for the goggles again, but Scully pulled them away and glared at him. Snickering at her reaction, he turned to Frohike to offer his consolation. "Well, it's a noble gesture." During this demonstration, Langly had been waiting in the wings impatiently, but now he picked up the other gadget from the table and stepped forward. "If you want something you can *really* use, check this out." He handed Mulder what looked like a converted laptop. "It's an educational program with a touch screen, to give the kid a head start on learning numbers and words and stuff." Reaching across Mulder, he pushed a few keys and then touched various colored boxes that emerged on the screen. "It's even programmed in five different languages: English, Spanish, French, German, and Klingon." Before either of the agents could respond, Frohike jumped in. "Who the hell would teach a kid Klingon?" "Well, I sure wasn't going to use Romulan. What do you know about kids, anyway? You're the one who used an adult- sized viewer for a baby." "That's just a prototype. I can fix the size. At least *I* made something appropriate for an infant, not a five- year-old Trekkie." As the two got in each other's faces and continued to bicker, Scully tuned out and stepped away. The last thing she needed right now was more stress. Leaning over to her, Mulder quietly joked, "Maybe I should tell Langly to program it with Reticulan." She watched as he walked over to interrupt the quarrel, but a gentle touch on her shoulder drew her attention away. She turned to find Byers handing her an envelope. Speaking softly, he seemed a little hesitant or embarrassed about what he was offering her. "I'm afraid my gift is a little impersonal, but I'm not quite as creative as my colleagues." Scully opened the envelope and pulled out a savings bond, for no small amount. Letting out a small breath in relief, she gave Byers a warm smile. "Thank you, John. This is something we can actually *use.*" A proud grin broke out at her reaction, but then he turned shy. "Um, we also have some refreshments. If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'll go get them out of the kitchen." She nodded her acquiescence, and he quickly disappeared through the doorway. Glancing over the bond again before placing it back in the envelope, Scully then turned to take in the tableau before her. She could hardly process the disparity. The room that was usually the drab gray and black of an electronics warehouse was now peppered with splashes of pinks and blues from balloons and streamers haphazardly taped to walls, shelves, and monitors. As her eyes completed their scan of the room, they came full circle to land on the table and the three men standing in front of it. Mulder was now at the center of the fray, with Frohike and Langly on either side, each holding his own invention and pointing out its superior features. Only, now, there was a new component that Scully hadn't seen before: Frohike was wearing a set of rubber nipples and illustrating to Mulder, with great determination, how they could work in correlation with his device. A noise like a sob escaped her lips, and the three men froze in mid-motion as they looked over in surprise. They found Scully watching them with a hand over her mouth. Mulder looked particularly concerned, but his grave expression was somewhat mitigated by the sight of his hand having come to rest on Frohike's nipple. Despite her efforts, Scully couldn't hold it in any more. A giggle escaped, followed by a cascade of laughter. They were all so serious, and she knew she shouldn't laugh at them, but she just couldn't help it. At first, the men looked at each other in confusion, but Mulder started to chuckle as he realized just how ridiculous they looked, and then the laughter became contagious. There they stood, three bachelors discussing the virtues of baby contraptions, and two of them wrestling with a set of rubber nipples. Finally getting herself under control, Scully managed to choke out, "I'm sorry. This really was incredibly sweet of you guys. Thank you for going to so much trouble." Just then, Byers reappeared with a large sheet cake in his hands and a heavy plastic bag dangling from his arm. He glanced at each of them in confusion as the chuckles died down to snickers and sighs. While he set down the cake and pulled out a handful of napkins, Mulder left the other two to work out their differences and wandered back over to his partner's side. As he stepped into place beside her, Scully reached out to take hold of his hand, and he looked down in surprise to see her smiling warmly at him. It was the best she could offer in reconciliation for their unfinished conversation earlier, and he squeezed her hand in acceptance. Scully felt this was the least she could do to show him her appreciation. For as much trouble as their three friends had gone to, Mulder had gone to so much more over the past several months. He really had been very supportive of her throughout the in vitro and the pregnancy, and it meant more to her than she could ever express. While they waited patiently for Byers to organize the table, Scully once again tried to process her thoughts. For so long, she had desperately wanted what had been taken from her, but only after the IVF worked did she realize just what she had gotten herself into. She was afraid that Mulder had yet to come to the same realization and that once the babies were born, it would finally dawn on him and his enthusiasm would fade. She knew that he would remain supportive of her, but she feared that his helpfulness would last only as long as it would take for another juicy lead to come along. Yet she also knew how hurt he would be if she voiced this concern to him. In the meantime, she felt that the best she could do was take each day as it came and gratefully accept whatever support he could offer for as long as it might last. Byers stepped away from the table, bringing Scully's attention back to the moment, and she took in before her the neatly arranged setting of napkins, plates, forks, and glasses, with the cake at the center. The scene was framed by their three hosts, beaming in pride at their display. The two agents, however, were frowning. Byers chuckled nervously at their reaction and jumped in to explain, "Don't worry, we didn't make it ourselves. We even had the store decorate it." The decoration in question was bright green lettering that spelled out: "Welcome G-Baby." Scully shook her head and said, "I thought you guys knew." She turned to her partner. "Didn't you tell them?" He just shrugged at her. "Actually, I didn't tell them anything. They figured it out for themselves. Maybe they're just as bad at reading ultrasounds as I am." Across the room, Langly snickered and said, "What? Are you going to tell us it's an alien?" His laughter was abruptly interrupted by an elbow in his side. Frohike leaned over and whispered, "That's not funny." But the exchange was clearly heard by all of them, and Scully just rolled her eyes. Before they could assert any more wild theories, she explained, "No, we're having twins." It was a good thing that everything had been set down on the table or else it might have landed on the floor, where all three of their jaws were currently residing. At their shocked silence, Mulder turned to his partner and stated the obvious. "Nope. I guess they didn't know." It took a moment for the news to sink in, but then an exclamation broke the silence: "Damn!" All heads turned toward Frohike in surprise, but he was too preoccupied to notice. He was reaching over to pick up the mechanical arm of his contraption. "Now I'll have to make another one of these." *********** *********** Title: Great Expectations 8: When I Grow Up Author: Emily Sim ********** "Mom, I don't really want to get into all this right now." "Dana, these are some things you need to get settled, the time will go quickly." "I just don't --" "Dana Katherine Scully. Honestly. I don't know how the two of you manage to arrive at the same place at the right time with the way you communicate. I think if you'd give Fox half a chance --" "Mom, I love you, so don't take this the wrong way. Butt out." "Dana!" "Look, we're talking. I need to go, okay?" "Will you be over for dinner tomorrow?" "Yes, we will. Bye, Mom." "Bye, honey." She set the phone down a little more forcefully than necessary. "That your mom?" Mulder set a glass of milk on the coffee table. "You couldn't tell?" He chuckled. "Just making sure." She reached for the milk awkwardly. It was starting to become difficult maneuvering around her growing bulge. "She has a point you know." Scully groaned. "She always has a point, lots of points. She tells you, she tells me. I don't need both of you hassling me." "This is not hassling you." His tone was sharp. "I've come up with an idea." "Oh?" "One that would make things a lot easier on both of us." "Easier. On both of us." "I could move into the extra bedroom, just until we find a house." His words coincided with her taking a sip of milk. It formed a white trail down her chin as she sputtered and choked. Mulder patted her back in an attempt to calm her. "Where the hell did that come from?" She wiped her mouth with the napkin he held out to her. "It makes a lot of sense." "Sense for who?" "Scully, what do you think I'm going to do? I'm suggesting we share space. It would make it much easier on all of us." "Share space?" "Is there an echo in here? Yes, share space. God, you'd think I was asking you to live with me or something." "You're not?" "Well, yes, but not exactly like that. I never planned on walking away, leaving you with all the work. If I were here full time it would make a lot of things easier. I want to help out. Will you just think about it?" That was part of the problem, she thought ruefully. She thought far too much. She wasn't sure if it was the influence of hormones -- maybe some rogue mothering gene had gottten loose -- but she was once again close to tears. She spent too many nights with her hands cradling her abdomen as the babies somersaulted in their watery home, wishing she could share the feeling with someone. Well, not just any 'someone.' Mulder. She wanted her babies' daddy to be there beside her, his hands alongside her own, experiencing all of it. She wanted to feel him wrapped around her, she wanted -- God, the books weren't kidding when they mentioned that second trimester increase in the sex drive. Not that she had firsthand experience with anything other than frustration. "Mulder, wait." She had broken from her reverie to find him poised at the door, ready to leave. "Look, Scully. I think I'm finally getting it, but I don't know if I can do this. I know you only asked for my genetic contribution, but I guess I'd hoped that something more might come from it. I didn't realize it would feel like this. I don't want to have to fight you over it -- over them -- but I want this, Scully. All of it. Surprise, surprise, Fox Mulder a daddy." "Mulder, you confuse me." She managed to get herself to her feet, swaying awkwardly. At seven months, with the twins and her short stature, she was a fair size. Mulder moved from the door to grip her arm, helping to steady her. "_I_ confuse _you_?" "Yes. I don't know what to think about anything." She pushed his hand away and put some space between them. "What happens if you meet someone? What then?" What happens to me is what she really wanted to know. She had no doubt about his commitment to the children they had created. It was the rest of it she was having a hard time with. She could just imagine the scene now. Mulder inviting his date in for coffee, while she hid in whatever part of their house was designated as her space. The woman would be perfectly coiffed, tall and busty while she would be still carrying around extra baby weight and saggy boobs. She sniffed back another tear. "What happens if I meet someone? Scully, are those hormones interfering with your hearing?" "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" The woman would be a brunette, no split ends, whereas she would probably be lucky if she managed to comb her hair between feedings. Never mind the bags she'd have under her eyes from being up all night. She was losing the battle with her tears, and damn it if she wasn't still horny. "Scully, where did you get the idea that I'd be looking for someone else?" "You wouldn't necessarily be looking, it could just happen." "You think I'd agree to all this," he gestured towards her abdomen, "and then leave you? Why do you think I want to move in with you?" "Mulder, I know you'd never abandon the babies --" "They're not 'the babies', Scully. They're our children. Ours." She swiped at her face. "I'm sorry. It's just --" she took the Kleenex he held out and blew her nose. She was crying in earnest now. "Oh, Scully." He pulled her into his arms, laughing as the babies protested the tight confines. "Can you feel that?" "First and second basemen, Scully." "Ballerina and a gymnast." "Maybe a baseball player and a ballerina?" "I'm sorry." "Shhh. Nothing to be sorry about." She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. He smelled good. One hand held her head firmly against him while the other stroked up and down her back. She groaned. Her lower back ached. "You okay?" "Yeah, sore back." "I could help with that, you know. Come here." He maneuvered them over to the couch and she found herself lying with her head resting on a pillow propped on his lap. It felt heavenly when he increased the pressure and began massaging. She swallowed another groan, one that had less to do with the back rub and more to do with how it was affecting her libido. "Will you think about it?" "Think about what?" She was having a hard time focusing. God, she needed to move before she embarrassed herself. "The house. Think about what I suggested." His hand strayed lower, keeping an even pressure. There were definite disadvantages to having an unconventional relationship. She forced herself to move, sitting up awkwardly. "Mulder, I don't know if I could. Afford it that is. Two babies cost a lot more than one." "I can afford it." "But I can't." "Are you going to argue with me every step of the way? Don't I get a say in things?" "My mother is right." She rubbed her eyes. "You're just going to wear me down." "Did she tell you to listen to me?" "She always tells me to listen to you. I feel like the two of you gang up on me all the time." "I've thought a lot about this, Scully. I know we haven't talked about any of the details yet, or about money --" he put one hand to her mouth as she began to protest, "about money, or daycare, or whether you should work or not." "Mulder, those are my decisions to make." "Mine too. Maybe I'll stay home with them." "You?" "Don't sound so surprised. It's just one idea. I want our kids to have a yard, with a swing set, maybe even a tree fort. Volunteer for cookie duty, or you know - be the class parent or whatever it is parents do. It's hard to have your own swing set or tree fort while living in an apartment. Just promise me you'll think about it." She took a deep breath. "Okay." "Good." He patted her arm, and then hesitantly stroked the hard bulge that cradled their babies. "Is this okay?" "It's always okay, Mulder." "Here, lean back and rest for a bit." He pulled her back down and this time she allowed herself to relax against him. "Mulder, did my mom tell you Bill was in town?" His hands ceased their caressing and she felt him stiffen. "No. She neglected to mention that." "Don't worry. I'll run interference. He won't hit a pregnant woman." "Is your mom hoping for family bonding?" "I think she'd settle for a respite from the hostility." "I take it he's not all that thrilled with Mutt and Jeff?" "Mutt and Jeff?" She playfully punched his leg. "Actually, Mulder," she cleared her throat, "he, um --" "He doesn't know, does he?" "Yes and no." "That isn't exactly an answer, Scully." "He knows I'm pregnant. He just doesn't --" "-- know I'm the father." Mulder finished for her. "Yeah, something like that." Mulder's head hit the back of the couch with a soft thunk. "You sure he won't hit a pregnant woman?" ********** Title: Great Expectations 8b: Family Matters Author: Emily Sim ************* Mulder wondered if the vein he could see pulsating in Bill Scully's neck was in danger of exploding. Maybe not just the vein, maybe Bill himself. "Mr. Mulder?" Bill closed the front door and toed off his shoes. "Bill. Nice to see you again. And just Mulder will do." Mulder extended his hand, somewhat surprised when Bill returned the gesture and responded with a firm handshake. "Mulder then. Where's Dana? I didn't see her car out there." "She'll be right out. We can't go ten minutes without her needing a bathroom stop." "You try having your bladder used as a trampoline." Scully came around the corner shaking her hands. "My mom needs a towel in the downstairs bathroom." She returned her brother's hug. "About time you got here." "Traffic. Let me look at you, Dana." He pushed her away whistling softly. "Definitely working on that beached whale look." She swatted him playfully. "I'm pregnant and armed, Bill. Watch it." Mulder reached around and settled his hands on her stomach, eliciting a scowl from Bill and a surprised squeak from Scully. "More like a basketball I think, Bill." "What's all this about my daughter being a whale and a basketball?" Mrs. Scully entered the sitting room with towels in hand. "I heard something about bathroom towels?" "Thanks, Mom. Here, I'll take them in." Mulder batted her hands out of the way. "I'll do it. You go sit and relax," he said, taking the towels from Mrs. Scully. "Make sure you put your feet up." "I'm a doctor, remember?" "When you start working on live patients, let me know." "Thanks, Fox." "No problem, Mrs. Scully." He was thankful to get out of the room and allow the two women time to read Bill the riot act about guests and manners. It irked him a little that Scully hadn't shared the twins' paternity with her brother, but then again, he could understand her reluctance to do so. Their relationship defied definition and he had learned enough about Bill to know the man had a difficult time with anything outside his own ideas of what was normal. Mulder stopped just outside the doorway when he heard Bill's voice. "What the hell was all that about, Dana?" Bill's voice was low, but not quiet enough that Mulder couldn't make out the words and the tone. "All what, Bill?" "You know very well what I mean, Dana. And why is he here in the first place, Mom?" "Bill, this is my home and Fox is . . .well, Fox is Dana's friend." "Friend, how?" "That's my business." Mulder could hear the irritation in her voice. "Can you be civil, Bill? Because if not, Mulder and I can leave." "Stay put, Dana. I can play nice. If only to keep from upsetting you and the baby." "Babies, Bill." Mulder, chose that moment to enter the room. Even Bill's reluctance to accept him in Scully's life couldn't dampen the pride, and yes, the love he felt whenever he had cause to remember those two little ones -- and Scully. He loved her too. She just couldn't seem to trust either his actions or words. Mulder took a seat next to her on the couch, watching Bill process what he'd just revealed. "Babies?" "Twins." Scully supplied with a small smile. "Twins." He whistled. "Holy sh--smoke. I knew it was a possibility, but hell, Dana. How're you going to handle two?" "We'll manage," Mulder supplied watching Bill's reaction. "Can I get anyone a drink? I've iced tea, pop, juice, or coffee." Maggie's voice was bright and a welcome interjection. "I'll help you, Mom." "Only if you feel up to it, dear." "I'm fine, Mom. I'll be right in." There was a scramble as both men moved to help her up off the couch. After a bit of fumbling they each took an arm. Mulder met Bill's scowl with an amused grin. "It takes two of us to get you up, Scully." Scully squeezed Mulder's forearm, twisting it painfully. "One more comment about my size and you're going down, Mulder." "Ow! Okay. Uncle. Aunt. Whatever. Just let go, Scully." "Letting go. Thank you both but I _can_ manage to walk all by mys--" the words were lost as she gasped. "Scully?" Mulder quickly pushed a surprised Bill out of the way and pulled her to him, his hand joining hers at her lower back. "What is it, Scully?" She slowly straightened up. "It's okay, it's gone now." "What's gone now?" Mulder tried to stay calm. Scully wasn't one to let on when things hurt. "Dana?" Bill moved closer. "What is it, Dana?" "Was it a contraction? Shit, Bill, what time is it?" "Calm down, Mulder. It's just a Braxton Hic --" her words were stopped again and Mulder could feel her tummy tightening under his hand. "What's wrong?" Maggie moved in quickly. "She's having contractions." Mulder moved so he was better able to support her weight, and leaned close to speak to her. "Scully, Sweetheart, lean back. I've got you." She pulled away, putting some space between them. "I am not having contractions. Would you stop hovering?" "Why don't you sit down, Dana?" Mrs. Scully grasped her daughter's arm and led her to a chair. "_Sweetheart_? What the hell is that all about?" "Not now, Bill." Maggie attempted to push Dana into the chair. "I'm fine, Mom. It's just a little back pain; I've had it most of the day." "Are you sure, Scully? You don't think we should go have the doctor check you out?" Mulder was feeling more panicked by the minute. "I'm sure, Mulder. One of the babies kicked at the same as a Braxton Hicks, making it feel a lot worse." "I don't understand you, Mom." Mulder could hear the agitation in Bill's voice. "Understand what, Bill?" Bill spread his arms apart. "All this -- this -- what has he got to do with all this?" He pointed to Mulder. "Billy, if you can't --" Scully was stopped by another sharp pain. "Damn it, Scully, at least let me call the doctor." Mulder rubbed her lower back until she straightened up. "We don't need the doctor. I think I just need to go home and lie down. I'm sorry, Mom." "Don't worry about it, honey. You need to take care of yourself and those two grandbabies of mine. Bill, why don't you go and get Dana's coat for her?" Bill's look of disgust was not lost on Mulder, and there was a brief moment when it appeared the elder Scully might not take Maggie up on what was clearly an effort to keep the peace. "Fine. I'll get the coat." He stopped at the doorway, turned around and fixed his gaze on Mulder. "But this is just a time out. I've got some questions I want answered. Soon." Scully's back stiffened. "Bill, my life is none of --" Mulder cut her off. "Not a problem, Bill." "Mulder, what the --" "Not now, Scully. It isn't good for the babies to have you all upset. We can do this later." "Fine." She crossed her arms. Mulder took a deep breath and groaned. Ten weeks to go. *********** *********** TITLE: Great Expectations 9: Never a Dull Moment AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: Scully checks in with her doctor and gets more than she bargained for. ****** "Mulder, if you keep staring at me like that, I'm going upstairs to work in the bullpen." Scully shot him a look and then returned her attention to the computer screen. He was trying to look busy but gave up, knowing that he had been caught. "I'm just concerned. I have a right to be, don't I?" "For the last time, I feel fine. I'm doing much better than I was last night. The back pain is all but gone." "You were having contractions. Don't try to tell me that's nothing." "They were just Braxton-Hicks. I've been having them for a while now." "I realize that, but last night they seemed stronger than anything you've had so far. I just wish you could've gotten in to see the doctor earlier." "Well, I couldn't. One o'clock is the earliest they could fit me in, so you'll just have to be patient. And stop staring." Mulder shifted restlessly and looked at his watch again. It wasn't even 11:00 yet. He wasn't sure that he'd last for another two hours, especially just sitting in the office with little to preoccupy him. The ring of the phone was a welcome distraction. "Mulder." "Agent Mulder, I'm glad I caught you. This is A.D. Skinner. Are you involved with a case right now?" "No, not really." "Good, because I need you to join me in Atlanta as soon as possible." Mulder glanced over at his partner, who was still focused on her screen, but he knew she was listening to his end of the conversation. "Um, today isn't really a good time. There's a personal matter I need to attend to." "Is it an emergency?" "Uh, no, I guess not. At least, I hope it isn't." "Well, then I need you here. Anything short of a family emergency can wait." Mulder sighed. "What's in Atlanta?" "A six-year-old girl went missing from her home last night. We have a full manhunt in progress, and we're working against the clock." "What do you need me for?" There was a pause before Skinner answered. "When the parents were first interviewed, they made some comments about lights in the sky and missing time, but nobody was taking them seriously, so they stopped talking about it. I'm not willing to leave any stone unturned in this investigation, and that's why I need you. You're the only person who can determine if there's any validity to their account." Rubbing his forehead, Mulder replied, "I'll get there as soon as I can." * * * Mulder brought the car to a stop in front of the glass doors leading into the clinic. Leaving the engine running, he climbed out and hastened to the passenger side to give Scully a hand as she struggled to get out. She seemed to grow larger by the day, and sometimes he worried that two of his offspring would be more than her small frame could accommodate. She was already too large to fit comfortably behind the wheel of a car, and they still had over two months to go. Once she had her footing, he released her arm but made no move to leave yet. "Maybe I should just go in with you. I can catch a later flight." "Mulder, go. Skinner's expecting you. Everything's going to be fine here--it's just a routine check-up. I was going to have one tomorrow anyway. This won't be any different than the one I had last week." He shifted his feet, obviously not convinced. "Just promise me that you'll call your mother if anything happens." "Mulder, nothing's going to--" "Just promise me." She heaved a very put-upon sigh. "Fine. Now go. You're going to miss your flight." "Yes, Mom," he teased, deftly side-stepping her before she could swat him. He leaned over and gave her a quick peck on the cheek before jogging back around the car. "Call me and tell me how it went." "I will." She waved at him as a final signal to leave. Once he finally climbed into the car and sped off, she turned and made her way into the clinic. At the sound of tires squealing behind her, she sent up a silent prayer that he'd make it to the airport in one piece. * * * "Hi, Dana. How are you feeling today?" Scully smiled at Susan as she entered the room. She tried her best to seem at ease, although she felt completely vulnerable with her feet up in the stirrups. "I'm doing okay. Just the usual discomfort." "I hear you've been having some contractions." "Yeah, they were especially bad last night, but I did have a rather stressful evening. I'm sure they're just Braxton- Hicks, but Mulder insisted that I have it checked out, so here I am." "Well, as they say, better safe than sorry. Let's take a look here and see how you're doing." Scully took a deep breath and tried to relax while the technician inserted the lubricated transducer to conduct a transvaginal ultrasound. She was no stranger to this technique, having undergone it a few times now to keep an eye on her cervical length, but that didn't make the procedure any more comfortable. Susan made small talk with her to try to keep her at ease, and before long, she declared the procedure complete. "So, how does everything look?" Scully did her best to ask this calmly, but even she could hear a slight tremor to her voice. "I'd like to have the doctor review the results. Just relax, and we'll be back in a few minutes." *"Relax"--right,* Scully thought as the door closed behind the technician. She sensed that she had every reason to be nervous. Susan was usually upfront with her, speaking to her in technical terminology just like she would with any physician. The fact that Susan needed to consult with the doctor first meant that something had to be wrong. After an agonizing wait, the door opened again, and Dr. White, the obstetrician on rotation today, entered and then pulled up a stool next to where Scully still lay on the table. Before he had a chance to speak, she cut to the chase. "What's wrong?" "Nothing to worry about, but I am little concerned about the changes to your cervix. You say you've been having contractions?" "Yes, but I thought they were just Braxton-Hicks." "They still might be, but your cervix has shortened, and you're slightly dilated. I'd like you to go over to Georgetown Memorial for a while so they can put you on a monitor. If the contractions don't abate, we'll have to admit you so we can stop the labor. Is Mr. Mulder here with you today?" Scully's attention had dropped off as her mind wandered through the frightening possibilities that accompanied pre-term labor. "What? No, he had to go out of town on a case." "Is there someone else you can call? I'd prefer you didn't drive over there on your own." Scully hesitated. She had been planning to take a cab home after the appointment, and she could just as easily take one to the hospital. But she had made a promise to Mulder. "Yeah. I'll call my mom." * * * "Can you open a window or something? It's like an oven in here." Maggie pulled her sweater tighter at the thought of chilling the air further. "It's not the room, honey, it's the medication. The window's already open, and we don't have a fan or anything. Let me get you a cool washcloth. That should help." "God, I hate this!" Scully all but shouted out as her mother got up and crossed the room. "The magnesium sulfate is making me hot, and the terbutaline is making me shaky. If the drugs are having this kind of effect on me, I don't even want to think about what they're doing to the babies." Maggie returned from the small bathroom and began to stroke the cool, wet cloth over her daughter's face. "I know you don't like taking medication, but the doctor said--" Scully impatiently took hold of the cloth and wiped down her arms and neck, managing to avoid the IV despite her brusque movements. "I know what the doctor said. I realize that the dangers of premature birth are much worse than the potential side effects of tocolytics, but I know the literature just as well as he does, and frankly, the jury is still out on the lasting effects of these drugs on a fetus." Maggie resumed her seat next to the hospital bed, knowing that she wasn't going to succeed in persuading her daughter otherwise. They'd already debated this point after the doctor determined that IV drugs would be necessary to stop the contractions. Instead of pushing it, Maggie decided to concede the battle and change the subject. "Did you get a hold of Fox yet?" "No." Scully sighed and tossed aside the washcloth. "I just keep getting his voicemail. I didn't want to leave too much information on the message at the risk of scaring him. Hopefully he'll call back soon." She glanced over at the clock on the wall again. It was almost 9 pm. She was trying to avoid getting anxious, but she would kill him if he had simply forgotten to charge his phone. Maggie picked up the discarded washcloth and returned to the bathroom to rinse it out with cold water again, mostly just to give herself something to do. Thankfully, Dana had a private room with a recliner, so she'd be able to stay with her through the night. But the night promised to be a long one. When Maggie returned, she simply handed over the cloth this time instead of trying to play nursemaid. "You should try to get some sleep, dear." "I'm too jittery. I don't think I can sleep." "Do you want me to turn on the TV?" "No, I doubt there's anything on. You sleep, Mom. I'll be okay." The sudden ringing of the phone made them both jump slightly. Since the bedside table was beyond Scully's reach, Maggie answered it. "Hello?...Yes, Fox, she's right here. Hold on." She handed over the receiver. "Mulder?" "Hey. Sorry I didn't call you back earlier. Turns out this case isn't it Atlanta; it's in the boondocks. They even brought in satellite phones from Ft. Benning because the lack of cell service was hampering the investigation. I didn't get your message until I got back to the motel." "How's the case going? Have they found her yet?" "No, and I think everyone's optimism is beginning to fade. The parents' story changes every time we talk to them, and they're starting to look more and more like suspects. But how are you? Actually, where are you? I didn't recognize the phone number you left for me." "First, promise me you won't panic." "That's not the best way to start a conversation, Scully." "Promise." "Okay, I won't panic. Where are you?" She calmly explained to him how she had landed in the hospital and her current status, glossing over any details that might sound too dire. "I'm catching the next flight out. I can be there in a couple of hours." "Mulder, you told me you wouldn't panic." "I'm not panicking, I'm just....okay, I'm panicking. Why shouldn't I? You're in labor." "I'm not in labor, I'm just having a few contractions. The medication will keep them under control. I'm under 24-hour supervision, and Mom will be here with me the whole time. I'm not going anywhere, and neither are the babies. Everything is going to be just fine. But right now, there's a little girl out there who needs your help much more than I do." A heavy sigh prefaced his compliance. "Okay, but I'll still try to get out of here tomorrow. Besides, I'm not sure how much more help I can be. Skinner brought me in to investigate the possibility of an alien abduction, but it's pretty clear to me that's not what happened." "Mulder, we both know that your talents are much deeper than just chasing down aliens. Stay as long as they need you. I'll be fine." Famous last words. * * * The first sign of trouble came at about 7 am. Maggie was finally sound asleep, having only catnapped through the night between the many visits from nurses and orderlies. As the sound of voices broke through her consciousness, she woke to find her daughter complaining to a young nurse who had just come on shift. "My breathing has become more labored over the past hour. I think you should call the doctor." The nurse didn't look at her directly, preoccupied rather with the IV bag she was changing. "I wouldn't worry about it. You've got two little ones pressing up against your lungs, so you should expect some difficulty taking deep breaths." Scully was starting to get testy, and Maggie wondered how long this conversation had been going on before she awoke. "Thank you. I'm painfully aware that I have two children pressing up against *all* of my internal organs, but I'm also a doctor, and I know the difference between the usual side effects of pregnancy and impending respiratory failure!" It was the wheezing following her labored speech that caused Maggie the most alarm. If her daughter thought this was serious enough to call the doctor, then it wasn't to be taken lightly. But the nurse still wasn't paying attention, so Maggie felt it was time to get the point across before Dana wasted any more breath that she obviously didn't have. Maggie stepped over and physically turned the young woman, finally capturing her full attention. "Listen,"--she looked down at her name tag--"Tami, my daughter is having trouble breathing. You need to call her doctor. Now." To her credit, Tami immediately realized that you don't cross a Scully woman who means business. She was out the door like a shot, and before they knew it, the room was teeming with activity. The first to arrive was the charge nurse, followed by yet another nurse wheeling in some equipment that Maggie didn't recognize. They flitted around the bed, checking Dana's vitals and rattling off numbers and medical shorthand. A few minutes later, a man wearing scrubs and a long white coat, apparently a doctor, strode in and started consulting with the nurses. He then slid the stethoscope from around his neck, positioned it in his ears, and leaned over to listen to Dana breathe. Maggie tried to stay out of the way, but she remained close enough to keep an eye on what was happening. "Dana, take a deep breath for me. Okay, again. Again." The doctor pulled the stethoscope from his ears and turned to address one of the nurses. "Let's get a blood gas and put her on O2. And call radiology. I want a V/Q and chest x-ray, and tell the ICU to get a bed ready." "No radiation." It was obvious that Scully was trying to speak strongly, but she could do little more than squeak out her words. Her voice was so weak that apparently the doctor didn't hear her the first time around, so she grabbed his arm to get his attention. "No radiation." "Dana, we need to rule out a pulmonary embolism or a more serious cardiac condition." She shook her head vehemently. "I'm pregnant. No radiation." He gently extricated the hand that was now tightly grasping his arm. "We'll run some less invasive procedures first, but if your symptoms don't improve and I can't diagnose you otherwise, you may not have a choice. Okay?" She wearily nodded her head, either too exhausted to argue or simply accepting the inevitable. An oxygen mask soon descended over her face, inhibiting any further protests. The doctor turned to the nurse who had just returned from carrying out his previous orders. "Cancel radiology. Does the ICU have a bed available?" At the affirmative response, he continued. "Good. Tell them to run an EKG and an echocardiogram. I'll be down to check on her later." Before Maggie knew it, Dana had been hurried out of the room. She tried to follow, but Tami told her to stay put until someone came to escort her to the ICU after Dana was settled. And then Maggie was suddenly alone. For a long moment, she just stood there trying to process what had happened. She still didn't understand what was wrong with her daughter, but the fact that she had been moved to the ICU couldn't be good. Not knowing what else she could do, Maggie finally reached for the phone. It was time for Fox to come home. * * * Scully awoke to the hums and beeps of machines. The last time she had been conscious was to discuss the results of the x-ray with Dr. White, the first of her own doctors that she had seen during this whole fiasco. She had finally conceded to the test once Dr. Chan explained that the alternative was receiving blood thinners as a precaution, which she knew would be much worse for the babies. Once the x-ray came back, the official diagnosis was pulmonary edema--fluid in the lungs--easily treated by discontinuing the tocolytics that had apparently caused it and putting her on furosemide to flush out the excess fluids. The oxygen mask had been replaced with a nasal cannula, and she'd finally been able to drift off to sleep for a while. As Scully now blinked awake, she soon became aware of a presence next to her bed. Turning her head slightly, she found Mulder there, his face buried in his folded arms that were propped against the bedrail. "Hey." Her voice was raspy and soft, but when his head shot up, she knew that he had heard her. What she saw broke her heart. The tear tracks were obvious, and the smile he offered to mask his emotions wasn't the least bit deceptive. She reached a hand toward his face but soon discovered that she didn't have enough energy to lift it all the way, so she was grateful when he reached down and picked it up to complete the journey. Holding her hand in both of his, he kissed the back of it tenderly before venturing to speak. "Hey. You gave us quite a scare there." Grateful that she could breathe freely again, she cleared her throat to strengthen her voice. "Me too. But everything's going to be okay now." She offered him a reassuring smile, and he returned the gesture, but his eyes were still full of worry. She decided to try a different approach to soothe him. "Did they tell you what those machines are for?" She gestured toward the end of the bed with her eyes and the tilt of her chin. He followed her gaze but then looked back at her and shook his head. "Those are fetal heart monitors. The charts are recording the babies' heartbeats." He looked back now, his eyes full of curiosity and a glimmer of hope. Encouraged by this, she continued. "Their heartbeats are strong, and their movements are good. I don't think they've even noticed what's going on outside." Mulder turned back to her with a shaky laugh. "A couple of little troupers, huh?" "Guess it's in the genes." They smiled at each other for a moment, and then Mulder took a deep breath and exhaled some of his anxiety. He kissed her hand again and then held it to his cheek, gently chafing it with his stubble. The gesture seemed intended not so much to comfort her as to comfort himself, still obviously shaken by what had happened. Scully didn't know quite what he had heard about her condition or from whom he had heard it, but she herself had only known the diagnosis for the last hour, so she could only imagine what sketchy details Mulder had received before he got there. She decided to change the subject instead of making him relive that trauma by explaining it to her. "Hey, how was the case?" He lowered her hand but still held it tightly, his eyes following his motions. "They haven't found the girl yet, at least not last I heard. They'd just gotten a warrant to arrest the parents before I left. I don't think there's much hope of finding her alive." "I'm sorry, Mulder. You've had a hell of a day." He chuckled, this time more heartily. "That's an understatement." "Sorry I can't offer much to make it up to you." He shook his head at her. "You're okay. The babies are okay. That's all I could ask for." * * * "Mulder, will you just settle on a channel already? You're driving me nuts!" "What do you want to watch?" "I really don't care. I just want you to stop." The "remote roulette" landed on a news station, and he tossed the device onto the bedside table. "What do you care, anyway? I thought you were reading." She sighed and dropped her paperback next to the remote. It had been three days since she was released from the ICU to a regular room, and now that she was feeling stronger, the inactivity was clearly getting to her. "I can't read. It takes too much concentration, and all I can think about is getting out of here. Where's Dr. White? I thought he was coming by today to spring me from this joint." Mulder leaned back in the chair, extending his legs. "I'm sure he'll be here soon." Tilting her head to one side and then the other, Scully stretched out her neck to release some tension. "I can't wait to get back on my feet again. I'm so sick of sitting in one place all day." "Well, don't expect too much action. Even without me breathing down your neck, I'm pretty sure that Skinner himself would insist on nothing more than desk duty at this point." "I don't care. Sitting at a desk is better than this. At least it would be a change of scenery." "So you're saying that my dazzling presence isn't enough for you?" She rolled her eyes at him, but the entry of Dr. White preempted her response. "Hello, Dana. How are you feeling today?" "Restless. Please tell me I get to go home." Despite her efforts to stay composed, she couldn't completely suppress her whiny tone. "Well, your stats are good, and your lungs are clear. I'd be happier if the contractions had stopped, but since you aren't further dilated, the best we can do right now is keep you on a monitor. But that's something you can do just as easily from home, and I think you'd be more relaxed there, so I see no reason to keep you here any longer." "Thank you." The relief was obvious in her voice, and she was practically glowing with joy. She probably would've kissed his feet if she could actually get on her knees with any hope of getting up again. "Now, we need to discuss your restrictions. I'm placing you on strict bed rest." Scully's smile started to fade. "That means you don't get up any more than necessary, basically only for trips to the bathroom and for semi- weekly visits to the doctor." Her smile wilted further. "And you need to be reclining as much as possible. Gravity is working against you, so the more you can stay horizontal, the longer we can delay the inevitable, and right now, that should be your top priority. You're at just over 28 weeks, and I'd like to see you make it past 30, to at least 32 or 33 weeks. There's an excellent NICU here, but I know we'd all prefer to see these babies born as close to full term as possible." The smile was now completely gone, replaced by an unreadable expression. "So, of course, that means no work, no cooking or cleaning, and limited showers. And no more sexual activity." The doctor shot her partner a chastising look. Mulder fully expected to hear her jump in with an explanation that such a reprimand wasn't necessary, but when he dared to glance over at her, he saw that her eyes were glazed over, and he wondered if she had even heard the doctor's last comment. Dr. White's attention had already shifted back to his patient. "Now, do you have enough help at home?" "Yes," Mulder quickly volunteered when she failed to respond. "Her mother and I will be there as much as she needs us. She won't even have to lift a finger." "Good, because she won't be able to. Do you both understand the restrictions?" He looked from one of them to the other. Mulder nodded vigorously. Scully just let her head fall back against the pillow, which the doctor apparently took to be half a nod. "Good, then I'll sign you out. Before you leave, a nurse will stop by to show you how to use the fetal monitor we'll be sending home with you. Call our office tomorrow morning, and we'll set you up for your next appointment." With that, the doctor was gone, either unaware of or unconcerned with the devastation he had left in his wake. Mulder turned to his partner to find her eyes closed, probably trying to shut out reality. "Guess that means you're on maternity leave, huh?" "I suppose I should've seen this coming. I just didn't realize I'd have to be so..." "Horizontal?" She chuffed out a laugh. "Yeah. But anything to have healthy babies, right? I should just be glad that I get to go home." "It won't be so bad, Scully. Besides, your mom and I will be around all the time to help you out." She groaned and covered her face with her hands. "That's what I'm afraid of." ********** ********** Title: Great Expectations 10: Pilgarlick Author: Emily Sim ************ Scully reached behind her and rearranged the pillow. Again. Her back hurt, her ass hurt, and if she had to watch one more talk show she was going to shoot the television. If she could convince her mother or Mulder to fetch her gun, that is. She was sick of lying around, sick of people hovering, and really sick of answering questions regarding her health. Or the babies' health. She hadn't been looking forward to wearing clothing that looked suspiciously like a grown up version of a toddler's wardrobe, but she hadn't banked on spending her last few weeks lounging in flannel either. Or just plain lounging. "Do you need anything before I pop out to the store?" Her mother set her bag on the table while she pulled a sweater on. "Can I pick you up something to read?" "Take me with you?" "Oh, honey. I know how hard this is for you. It won't be for much longer and then it will be just a memory." "God, Mom, why would I want to remember this?" "You will. All the hard parts will fade and you'll be left with the good memories. And take advantage of the time you have to lie around. When those two are born you won't sit down for 18 years." Scully groaned and rearranged herself. "This is all Mulder's fault." "Fox's? How do you figure that?' "I don't know, it just is." "I'll be sure to let him know." "When will you be back?" Oh, God, she was whining. Her mother's company would be better than being on her own right now, even if her mom was slowly driving her crazy. "I just need to purchase a few things. You're almost out of milk, and I thought I'd pick up the ingredients for a couple of lasagnas for your freezer. You remember I'm away this weekend, don't you? I thought I'd save Fox the trouble of cooking." "Mulder doesn't cook, Mom. He dials." "He'll have a couple of options then. So, nothing?" "I'll be fine." "Okay then. Call if you think of anything." "I will. Bye, Mom." "Get some rest, honey, I won't be long." She heard the door close and the dead bolt being thrown. Rest. That's all she was getting. And bed sores. She flipped the television back on and began scanning. Surely there was something in the afternoon lineup that she'd missed. Even a rerun of something she hadn't seen in a while would do. God, what she wouldn't do for Mulder and one of his wacky cases right now. But there would be no ghosts. No exsanguinations, cow tipping or vampire cult cases. Mulder was refusing anything but the most mundane tasks, so she couldn't even live the X-Files vicariously. And Skinner was right there supporting him. Mulder hadn't taken anything on that would take him out of town or occupy more than his eight-hour shift. She couldn't even count on a spooky story these days. He'd been downright domestic, which was more frightening than the idea of pushing two little humans out of that tiny space. Actually, the thought that she might end up with a C-section was scarier than even a vaginal delivery. She had far too much time on her hands. Thinking about the babies and their delivery was keeping her up most nights. When she wasn't awake obsessing over details like feeding schedules and college education, she was dreaming about them. When she wasn't peeing, that is. So far, she'd managed to convince both Mulder and her mom that she could cope fine on her own at night, but it was getting harder to do so. What she wouldn't give for her black power suit and a good five-inch heel to meet that battle. It was only a matter of time before one of them -- the sound of her door slamming and loud grunting startled her. Shit, where was her gun? Scully pushed herself up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. Between her very rounded abdomen and feeling light-headed from being prone, she was slow. The grunting was now accompanied by soft swearing. She took a deep breath to calm her racing heart. It was Mulder. She was going to kill him. "Mulder?" "It's just me, Scully." Another grunt and the sound of something heavy being set down. She made her way to the door, forgoing her robe and slippers -- she couldn't see her damn feet anyway. She came around the corner to find her partner pulling his jacket off. "Mulder, there's a fish tank on my floor." "Did I wake you, Scully? I'm sorry." He tossed his jacket onto the back of the couch and wiped his hands on his jeans. "Mulder, what's going on? I'm quite sure when you asked me if I needed anything when you left here yesterday _fish tank_ wasn't on the list. In fact, I don't think anything was on the list. I think I may have even --" "You threw your hairbrush at me, Scully. I have a good memory." "Well?" "Shouldn't you be lying down? Sitting, at least." "Don't change the subject." She sat down. Standing hurt her back too much and she was sure there was a headache somewhere in this. "Well, I -- uh. It's mine." The words burst forth as he hastily took the chair opposite the couch. "Why would I want your fish tank?" She took in the bundle of wires and attachments beside it. "Where are the fish?" "Dead." "So you just thought what? I'd like an empty -- what is it, ten gallon tank? Twenty? You thought I could use a new planter? Get some fish of my own?" "We could keep it here." "We? Keep it here?" "Well -- just until...." The last part of his sentence was muffled behind his hand. "Mulder, what the hell is going on?" "Just until I find a new home for it." "Mulder, help me out here. Why do you need a new home for your _empty_ fish tank? Why don't you just go out and buy a new molly?" "Well, I --" A loud banging on her door interrupted him. "Mulder, open the door." "What the hell? Tell me that isn't Frohike, Mulder." "Okay, it's not Frohike." He stood and opened the door to admit a pissed off Frohike. From what she could see, that is. Only his eyes were visible, and they oozed pissed off. He was buried behind a pile of suit bags that were beginning to slip from his hands. "Last time I do you a favor." He let go, dumping the bags on the floor, noticing Scully for the first time. "Oh, sorry, Scully. Didn't mean to mess up your lovely abode. And how are you doing this fine day?" He took a step back. "Frohike? What is all this?" She looked from one man to the other. "I told you we should've called first. Well, gotta go. Langly's double parked out there. Ciao." And he was gone. Mulder's mouth opened and closed, but she couldn't hear any sound. He began to move away but she stopped him with the iciest stare she could manage from her position. "Tell. Me. Now." "I sort of need a home for it." "Did your landlord suddenly decide no fish tanks?" "I sort of don't have a landlord right now." "Did something happen to him? Is he okay?" "He's fine. He just isn't my landlord anymore." "God, Mulder, what happened? Was there a fire? An explosion? Did anyone get hurt?" "No, no and no. I moved out, Scully." It was her turn to be struck speechless. "It's temporary, Scully. I've got something in progress for us." She blew out the breath of air she was holding. "Thank God. I thought you were -- sorry, that's not coming out right. I'm glad nothing bad happened. I just --" his words finally caught up to her. "In progress for _us_?" "Look, can I hang these in the guest room before they get all wrinkled?" She watched, open-mouthed, as he began to scoop up the bags littering the floor and move them to the nursery. It took her a moment, and then she was on her feet. "No, Mulder." She moved quickly, managing to make it to the door for support just as her abdomen tightened in a sharp contraction. "Scully? Oh shit." The suit bags joined the baby paraphernalia covering the floor. "Here, lean on me and let me get you back to your room." "No, the couch is fine. I just moved too fast." She managed to get out. "Shouldn't we put the monitor on? Oh, God. Should I call Susan?" "Just shut up. Please. We don't need the monitor; let me sit until it passes." She gripped his hand tightly, breathing through another contraction. It wasn't as strong as the first one. If she just kept still they would settle down. This had happened the other day when she'd moved around more than she should have. "I'd feel better if you let me get the monitor. Shouldn't you put your feet up?" "This is your fault, Mulder." She straightened up. "My fault? How do you figure that?" She let go of his hand and allowed him to help her settle back down on the couch. He tucked a pillow under her feet and tucked the blanket around her. "You just show up with your fish tank and your suits --" "I'm going to go get the monitor." She grabbed his hand and held on. "No. You tell me what your fish tank and suits are doing in my apartment." "It's just until I finish up some other stuff I'm working on. I can use the guest bed--" "Mulder, that bed is buried under baby stuff. Baby clothes, baby toys, diapers, and whatever else you keep buying." "I can manage, Scully. And then you wouldn't have to be alone at night." "I _like_ being alone at night. It's driving me crazy with you and my mother hovering all the time." "Well, I don't like it. I worry that something might happen and I won't get here in time." She sighed in resignation. Mulder could be like a scrap yard dog with a bone when he wanted something. She didn't have the energy to keep arguing with him. Besides, it might not be so bad to have someone to talk to when she was up in the wee hours of the morning, unable to sleep. "Okay, but for how long? What's the in progress thing?" "Well, I'm waiting to hear back from someone about a place I saw. So, depending on that, it could be a couple of months give or take." "But the babies will be here by then." "It'll all work out, Scully. You'll see. Just let me worry about it, okay?" He smoothed the blanket over her. "Why don't you have a nap?" "Actually, I'm a little hungry. My mom left some soup in the fridge; can you put it on to heat?" "Sure. I'm kind of hungry myself." When she heard him rattling around in the kitchen she closed her eyes. She was tired, and the whole exchange with him had worn her out. It was a little unnerving, Mulder suddenly deciding to move out of his beloved hovel. When had he ever been concerned about where he lived? The only thing he showed any pride in was those expensive suits he collected. And that stupid couch of his, which he hadn't brought over, thank God. Scully's eyes suddenly flew open in abject horror -- oh God. He'd left his couch behind. And she had just told Mulder he could move into her place. What the hell was going on? *********** Mrs. Scully found Fox easily. His table was covered with fragments of white and as she got closer she saw why. His eyes were unfocused and he was methodically shredding napkins. This didn't look good. It had been an uncomfortable two days. She had come back from running her errands to find Fox had moved in, sort of. According to Dana it was short term, but all her instincts, honed from dealing with four children, told her something else was going on. Late last evening there had been a flurry of phone calls, and then Fox had run out. She'd heard the dead bolt being latched sometime after eleven and it was well after one before he got back home. She knew that because she'd been woken up by Dana's voice, loudly protesting his night wandering. Although she was positive Dana had used the word 'ditch' several times. "Fox?" He stood up quickly, sending some of the tissue into the air. "Mrs. Scully; thanks for meeting me." "My pleasure, Fox. And it's Maggie, please." She sat down opposite him and watched as he sheepishly gathered up the napkin remains and balled them together. "Would you like a coffee?" "That'd be lovely, Fox. Just milk, no sugar, please." "I'll just be a minute." He left to join the short line at the Starbucks counter. It didn't take long and soon they were sipping strong, hot coffee and she could observe him without being too obvious. Drinking coffee was giving Fox something to do with his hands other than torture more napkins, but he was oozing nervous energy, obviously trying to figure out how to tell her something. She began to worry that it might be connected to those phone calls and his disappearance last night. "Fox? Why don't you just tell me what's going on?" At his startled look she laughed. "You couldn't possibly think that I wouldn't notice?" She pointed to the ball of white. "Something is on your mind." His smile was tight, and he looked almost guilty. "Yeah. Something all right. I thought if I could manage to tell you, it wouldn't be too hard to tell Scu--Dana." "Oh, Fox. You're worrying me. Is everything okay?" "Mrs. -- sorry, Maggie. I did something and I'm pretty sure Scully's going to kill me when she finds out." "Goodness, what's happened?" "Well, you know I moved out of my apartment, right?" At her nod he continued. "Well, I told Scully I was in between places; that I wanted to be closer to her and the babies. That wasn't the whole truth." Maggie gripped her coffee mug a little tighter, worried now about what he was going to reveal. "Maggie, I bought something." Her anxiety dissolved into joy. A ring. He was going to ask her permission. Fox really was a traditionalist at heart. She reached across and grabbed his hand. "Go ahead." "A house, Mrs. Scully." "Yes, you have my bles -- a house?" "Yeah. For the kids and all." "A house." She sat back. He had bought -- a house? "It's in the Old Alexandria area. Scully really loves that area. She's mentioned the style of houses there a couple of times. It's close to work so I won't have a long commute, which gives me more time to help her out at home. It has five bedrooms and a huge yard with trees. There's an oak tree that will be perfect for a tree house when the kids are old enough. It's close to shopping and the park is within walking distance. It's perfect." She had recovered enough to catch most of his enthusiastic description. "It sounds lovely. But Dana knows nothing about this, does she?" She watched joy be replaced by the anxiety. "No," he said miserably." I've been trying to tell her. She's been so grumpy lately; I haven't wanted to make things worse for her." "Oh, Fox," she patted his hand. "The two of you need to work on your communication skills. Now, when were you planning on asking her?" "Asking her?" "Well, I'm assuming -- dear me." She blushed. "I am rather old fashioned I guess. I just assumed you were -- never mind." "Maggie, I'm not sure I follow." "Never mind, Fox. Well, a house then. That's a rather -- large gift, isn't it?" "I was hoping we'd be sharing it." "Oh, I see." She straightened up in her seat; she was a Scully after all. So what if her daughter and her -- she wasn't sure what category to put Fox in these days -- her Fox were somewhat unconventional? At least they weren't having sex. Maybe there was hope for them doing something in a more traditional order. Then again, the two of them had yet to do anything her generation might consider normal in a relationship. Goodness, how was she going to explain this one to Aunt Mavis? Or Bill? Or _anyone_? ********** ********** TITLE: Great Expectations 11: Fishery, Cribbage, and Bedlam AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: Tales of confinement ***** *Wednesday* Mulder turned his key in the door that was becoming as familiar to him as his own and pushed it open with his shoulder. He could hear the drone of the TV across the living room and spied his partner's crimson crown over the end of the couch. Hoping she was asleep, he quietly latched the door behind him and began to toe off his shoes next to the large, glass container shoved into the corner behind the coat rack. "Mulder, you can't leave the fish tank there." He sighed and closed his eyes in search of patience. Since his appearance with the empty fish tank a few days previous, this had become a familiar line. He moved the tank, and Scully complained about where he put it: The spare bedroom was too crowded. She might trip over it in the hallway. It was too unsightly in the living room. She wouldn't even consider having it in her bathtub (regardless of the fact that she couldn't get in it anymore). But the crisis with the fish tank was only symbolic of their greater existence right now: he went out of his way to be helpful, but it seemed that nothing would please the sequestered Scully. After another deep breath, he turned to face her. "I'm running out of places, Scully. Where do you want me to put it?" "Why did you even bring it over here in the first place?" Uh oh. She was in a whiny mood today--this wasn't a good sign. Undoing his tie, Mulder stepped closer to the couch so she wouldn't try to get up. "I don't know. It seemed like a good idea at the time." "Yeah, you and your good ideas..." she mumbled. "What was that?" "Nothing." He looked around the room, searching once more for an acceptable solution. "Okay, how about I put it in the corner by the window and throw a blanket over it?" "Why can't you take it wherever your couch is? You still haven't explained to me where that ended up." He turned away from her before answering. He wasn't ready to tell her about the house, but he couldn't lie to her face. "It's, um--in storage." "Then why didn't you put the fish tank in storage?" She sat up more fully to watch while he picked up the cumbersome tank and carried it across the room. "Because I was afraid the movers might break it." "Why--" Mulder set down the tank and turned to face her again. "Look, Scully, I realize now this was a bad idea, but it's here, so we'll just have to find a place for it until I can move it. Okay?" Her arms crossed over her chest in a show of protest, but she begrudgingly agreed. "Fine." Looking around the room, Mulder only now realized that his partner was here alone. "Where's your mom?" Her eyes quickly dropped away from his. "Uh, she left. But there's a casserole heating in the oven for us." She gestured absently toward the kitchen. "I hope she didn't leave on my account. I mean, I know she's--" "No, I'm pretty sure she left because of me." "Why?" When her only response was a guilty expression, he prodded, "What aren't you telling me?" Scully picked at a loose thread on the blanket in her lap, still refusing to meet his eyes. "We had a fight. I kind of kicked her out." "Kind of?" "I yelled at her, and I'm pretty sure I swore at her too." Coming over to join her on the couch, Mulder leaned in closer than necessary, trying to catch her gaze. "Why?" Scully sighed and finally looked over at him. "I just want my space back. You two are always hovering, like a couple of"--her hand fluttered in the air for a minute as she struggled to find the right word--"hoverers, and I just don't have any room to myself anymore." He took the hint and backed off a little, before that hovering hand found him to be an easy target. "Scully, we're just trying to--" "I know what you're trying to do, and I appreciate it-- sometimes--but I don't need to be under twenty-four hour guard. I'm not going to spontaneously combust if I'm left alone for a couple of hours." Mulder pivoted and brought his knee up onto the couch to face her fully. "And what if something happens and we're not here?" She gestured to the cordless phone on the coffee table. "Then I call 9-1-1. Or I call one of you. You know, most of the time I'm just sitting here anyway. I don't need help doing that." He ran a hand over his face in frustration. Getting some space didn't sound like such a bad idea right now. Besides, he had been searching for an excuse to buy him some time over at the new house. He stood and announced his decision. "Then maybe I should take off for a while tonight. I've got some things to take care of anyway." "Apartment shopping?" She sounded a little too hopeful about that. He deflected. "Uh, yeah, housing stuff." "Mulder, please tell me you're looking." The whiny tone was back. "At least so you have someplace to put your fish tank." He smiled to reassure her and answered, "I promise that I will find the fish tank a nice home." * * * *Friday* It had been another boring day at work. For once in his life, Mulder was grateful for a weekend to take him away. With no partner in the office to keep him company, and no interesting cases to keep him occupied, the office had become his least favorite place. But, as much as he loved his partner and the thought of having kids with her, these days coming home to her wasn't the joy he had expected it to be. He understood that Scully was miserable in her current state, but she seemed to be taking the old adage "misery loves company" a little too seriously. Quietly opening the front door, he carefully peeked his head inside to see if she was waiting to throw anything at him. All was silent, so he dared to enter. After removing his shoes and his jacket, he made his way toward the back of the apartment. There was no sign of Scully on the couch, so he figured she must not have made it out of bed today. "Mulder, what happened to the baby swing?" The voice from behind surprised him, and he turned to find Scully standing just inside the spare room. "What are you talking about?" He made his way down the hall to join her. "The baby swing. The one that mysteriously showed up in the nursery a week after I told you we didn't need one yet?" He stood just behind her in the doorway and looked over her head at the mess. The room was a jumble of baby things and enough of his belongings to get him by on a daily basis. The only bald spot was a space on the bed just large enough for him to curl up and grab a few hours of sleep each night. But there was a method to the madness; he had hoped that by leaving everything a mess, she wouldn't notice that items were slowly disappearing. "Um, I moved it." "Moved it where? That box was huge. It looked more like a swing set than a swing." "Uh, I rearranged some things, to make room for my stuff." He placed a hand on each shoulder and rotated her to face him so she'd stop looking around the room, lest she notice what else had gone missing. "What are you doing in here, anyway? You're not supposed to be on your feet." Ever defiant, she settled her fists on her hips. "I'm allowed to go to the bathroom, Mulder." "This isn't the bathroom." "It's not that much further. Besides, this is my apartment. I can go anywhere I want." He made a quick decision. Marshmallow Mulder hadn't been having much luck, so it was time to bring out the iron fist. "Not in here, you can't." She gaped at him in disbelief. "Are you telling me it's off limits?" "It is now." He stepped around behind her and gently nudged her out of the room, closing the door behind them once they had cleared the threshold. To his relief, she went willingly, but not without whining the whole way. "Mulder, that's supposed to be the nursery. It's never going to be done in time. The babies will be here and we won't have any place to put them." "You let me worry about that. *You* need to worry about where they're living right now." "Nag." "C'mon, back to bed." He playfully swatted her on the behind to get her moving faster. She twisted her head back to glare at him. "You touch my ass again and you lose that hand." But he just smiled as he stepped back out of her reach. "Empty threats, Scully." "You just wait until I'm mobile again--" "As long as you realize you're not mobile now. I swear, every time I come home, I find more evidence of your wandering around the apartment. If you don't stop, I'll have to strap you to the bed." She ignored the leer that accompanied that suggestion and slapped his hands away when he tried to help her get settled in bed. "I can't stay in bed all day; I have to pee every ten minutes." "Then maybe I'll suggest to your doctor to put in a catheter." Her eyes widened in horror. "You wouldn't!" He raised his brows as if to say, "Just try me." When her jaw clamped shut in stunned silence, he knew she had gotten the message. * * * *Sunday* Mulder tried the door handle, hoping it would turn on its own--the door wasn't usually locked while Scully's mom was there. But it didn't budge. He frowned and then dug out his keys. When he had left that morning to do some things at the house, he'd been hoping to find the two women on speaking terms again when he got back. Regardless of her daughter's behavior, Maggie continued to stop by daily, but she had barely spoken two words to Scully since their fight. Mulder kept gently urging his partner to smooth things over with her mother, but it seemed that his words continued to fall on deaf ears. The TV murmured in the living room, but apparently it wasn't loud enough to mask his entry, because no sooner had he stepped inside than he heard: "Mulder, I want fish." He froze for a moment as he tried to process this request. He'd never cooked fish before. Letting the door swing closed behind him, he answered, "Uh, okay. I don't think I could make salmon or anything, but I can get some fish sticks--" "No, in the tank." Mulder moved over to stand by the couch. "I thought you didn't want the tank, that it was an 'eyesore.'" Scully struggled to sit up, not pushing him away for once when he dared to give her a hand. "It is. But as long as it's here, there might as well be something in it. It'll give me something to watch besides the TV. You have no idea how bad daytime TV is." "Well, then I guess I'll go out later and get some fish." Mulder knew she was bored to death, and extremely uncomfortable, and he really did feel for her, but there wasn't much he could do to improve the situation. Her mention of the TV, however, suddenly gave him an idea. Clapping his hands together in enthusiasm, he said, "Actually, I know just what you need!" Before she could ask, he hurried down the hall to retrieve a box from the spare room. Despite the apparent disaster area, he knew exactly where everything was. And the mess was quickly dwindling since he'd been able to sneak another bag of toys out last night while Scully was asleep. He quickly returned to the living room, knowing that if he were gone too long, she would get curious and get up to follow him. Dropping the box onto the floor next to the coffee table, he plopped himself down beside it. "What's that?" He grinned at her. "My videos." Her spine immediately went rigid, and she scolded in a hushed tone, "Mulder, get those out of here before my mother sees them!" He laughed at her assumption. "Not *those* videos." Reaching inside the box, he pulled out a cassette and turned it so she could see the title: Plan 9 from Outer Space. "Bet you haven't seen most of these, Scully." Settling back into the couch, she put on an air of disinterest. "There's a reason for that." Undaunted, he proceeded to unpack the movies and stack them on the table in front of her. "You'll just love picking these apart. It'll be almost as good as shooting down my theories." "Even Ed Wood isn't *that* outlandish." Curious now, Scully picked one of the videos up and turned it over to read the back. "Don't knock it till you've tried it." Setting the cassette down in her lap, she looked at him with a spark of defiance. "You do realize I'll have to get up to change the tapes." "Not if I move the VCR to the coffee table." She retorted smugly, "Then the cords won't reach." But he had a quick comeback: "I'll get longer ones." "But then I'll trip over them." He grinned in triumph. "No, you won't, because you won't be walking around." Crossing her arms, she huffed in frustration, "You just have an answer for everything, don't you mister smarty- pants?" He chuckled at her unwillingness to accept defeat. "Anyone ever tell you how sexy you are when you're cranky?" "Mulder, shut up." Since she had a projectile within her reach, he decided not to push his luck. He finished unpacking the box and then shoved it over to the corner. "So, do you think your mother will stop by today?" He tried to sound nonchalant. It was the best way he could think of to bring up the issue again. "Actually, you just missed her. She dropped by on her way home from church. There's a pot of stew in the fridge." "Do you know if she's still taking you to your appointment tomorrow?" Scully dropped the tape onto the table and wrestled with the pillow behind her. "I know what you're getting at, Mulder, and the answer is 'yes'. I called her this morning and apologized for what I said to her the other day. She said she had already forgiven me but that it was nice to hear it anyway." "Good, because it was getting a little cold in here every time the two of you were in the same room." She settled back into the pillow and looked over at him where he still knelt on the floor. "It's not the first time we've fought. We always move past it." His brow crinkled as the implications set in. "You mean this is going to happen again?" She primly replied, "It's called a mother-daughter relationship. If you plan on sticking around here, you better get used to it." Stifling a groan, he ran a hand through his hair and muttered, "Good thing we're going to have plenty of space." "What's that?" Mulder froze when he realized he had almost let the cat out of the bag. He was still too chicken to tell her what he had done. Fear of being found out triggered an adrenaline rush, and he was soon on his feet. "Uh, I think I need to go pick up some longer cords so I can move the VCR. Be back in a few." And he was out the door. ***** ***** "Dana, are you expecting a package?" "What?" Scully waddled out from the bedroom with a hairbrush still in her hand. "A delivery man just buzzed up. He's bringing up a package." Scully frowned at her mother. "No, I didn't order anything, but it wouldn't surprise me if Mulder did. He's bought two of everything he can get his hands on--I think he's competing with Noah. Can you sign for whatever it is? I'm not ready yet." "Well, hurry, dear. We're going to be late for the appointment." A knock sounded behind Maggie, and she turned to get the door. She opened it to find a young man in a uniform holding a long, heavy-looking box. "Can you step back, ma'am? I don't want to accidentally hit you with this." Maggie stepped out of the way and watched in surprise as another man with a matching box followed him through the door. They propped up the unwieldy items against the back of the couch, and then the first man turned to hand her a clipboard. "If you wouldn't mind, just sign here." She took the board and the pen. "Do you know who ordered these?" "It should say on the invoice." He checked her signature and then tipped his hat at her. "Thank you, ma'am. Have a nice day." Blinking in confusion at the two large boxes, Maggie turned to ask one more question, but the men were already gone. "Who's it--what on earth!?!" Scully came to a stop as she caught sight of their delivery. "What are they?" "I'm not sure." Maggie was returning from shutting the door. On her way back, she spied an invoice attached to the outside of one package and stooped to detach it. Unfolding the paper, she moved over to join her daughter while glancing over it. "Apparently they're cribs." "I didn't order cribs. Are they from Mulder?" Maggie's quiet gasp signaled her recognition of the sender. She held the page up for her daughter to see. "Look, Dana. They're from Bill." "Bill? My brother Bill?" Scully grabbed the sheet to take a closer look and then turned to her mother in surprise. "I never thought.... I don't know what to say." "Well, I think a thank you would be in order." Scully considered the boxes. "Do you think this is a gesture of acceptance, or are these really from Tara?" "You'll have to call them to find out. But right now, we need to get moving." "No, wait. I want to look at these first. Maybe there's a picture inside." That glimmer in her eye was the same one she used to get at Christmas when she received an intricate new toy, like the year she got a chemistry set and didn't emerge from her bedroom for nearly a week. Maggie tried to reason with her. "Dana, Fox can put them together when he comes home." "But, Mom, I want to see them now." The whine was back. But her demeanor quickly changed. "I know--I'll call Frohike! He can come over and put one together while we're at the appointment. Then we can surprise Mulder when he comes home." With a heavy sigh, Maggie accepted the compromise. "All right, dear, but call him quick. We really are running late." Grabbing her cell phone from the table, Scully headed for the coat rack. "I'll call him on the way. Somehow I suspect he doesn't need a key to get into my apartment." * * * Muffled voices were audible from inside the apartment as Scully turned the key in her door: "Quick, put that down-- they're home!" Stepping inside, she found Frohike and Langly shuffling into place next to two shiny, new cribs now dominating her living room. Frohike was subtly bouncing on his toes, beaming at her in pride, and Langly was--well, Langly just looked like Langly. But Scully hardly noticed the two, entranced as she was with the cribs. Coming over to inspect them, she almost giggled in delight. "Oh, they're beautiful! Now we can finally put the nursery together!" Maggie had followed her daughter over and was running her hand over a smooth railing. "My, they're a bit larger than I would have expected. They can probably last you until the children are ready for a real bed." At her mother's words, Scully frowned and stepped back to get more perspective. "Did you two measure the doorway?" Frohike shot a panicked glance at Langly, who only shrugged, and then asked warily, "What doorway?" She gestured toward the hallway. "The door to the nursery. That's where they're going. I certainly can't leave them out here in the living room." "Uh, no, we didn't measure the doorway." Frohike's look of trepidation at Scully's impending lecture turned into relief when the sound of the front door opening drew everyone's attention. Mulder stepped inside to find four sets of eyes staring back at him. "Hey guys, what's going--" But it didn't take long for him to spot the cribs, considering that they took up the entire living room. He turned to Scully and asked incredulously, "You bought cribs?" Approaching him carefully, wary of his reaction to what she was about to say, she broke the news with a light tone. "Actually, Bill sent them. Can you believe it? But, they're perfect, Mulder. Come look." Everyone stepped out of the way as she led him over to get a closer view. Scully looked hopeful, but Mulder wasn't to be persuaded easily. "Didn't he think to ask whether we already have cribs?" "Well, we don't--" She stopped mid-sentence and turned to look at him squarely. "Do we, Mulder? I know you're good at hiding things around the apartment, but I haven't seen any cribs anywhere." Not meeting her eyes, he grudgingly mumbled, "Don't worry about it," and then walked off toward the back bedroom. Scully stood watching him in confusion while the two other men shared an uncomfortable look; but Maggie decided to pursue. "Fox?" She stepped uncertainly inside the open door to the spare room. He turned at her voice. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be ungrateful, but..." "You already bought cribs, didn't you?" she offered in a gentle tone. "Yeah." Dejectedly, he took a seat on the bed. "They're over at the"--looking past her to make sure Scully wasn't standing within earshot, he chose his wording carefully-- "new place. They were supposed to be part of the surprise." "Fox." Maggie shut the door behind her and then came over to perch next to him on the bed. "Don't you think it's time you told her about the house?" "But I wanted to have the nursery set up before she saw it. I wanted everything to be perfect." He exhaled his defeat. "I guess I'll have to take the other cribs back. It wouldn't go over very well to reject Bill's gift. But he should've considered that I can take care of my own--" Stopping himself, he looked sheepishly at Maggie. "I'm sorry, I just--" "I know. But if you would just talk to Dana about this..." Mulder stood and retreated toward the door. "I'll see about getting these moved over to the house--if I can figure out how to sneak them past Scully, that is." He opened the door swiftly, ready to make his escape, only to find Frohike standing on the other side. "Oh, sorry. I was just here to measure the door. Scully wants us to move the cribs in there." He looked past Mulder and took in the disaster area that was to be the nursery. "Uh, I don't think the door's the only thing I need to measure." "We can just move a few things." At the sound of Scully's voice, both men turned to see her move up beside them. Frohike looked at her skeptically. "A few things? Even if you move out all of Mulder's crap--oh, sorry, Mrs. Scully-- um, junk, we can't fit in even one crib as long as that bed's in there." "Then we can move it." "Where?" Mulder asked in disbelief. He scanned the apartment, wondering if the bed would become another fish tank problem. But Scully seemed unconcerned. "Just prop it up against a wall for now. Maybe you can put it in your new apartment if you get a two-bedroom." Several eyes shot toward Mulder at the mention of living arrangements, and he quickly covered by stepping over to his partner and steering her away. "Look, why don't we get you settled in bed and then we can discuss this later." * * * Mulder needn't have worried about the mattress suffering the same fate as the fish tank--he did, instead. It had taken the better part of the evening to get the bed disassembled, the cribs disassembled, the cribs reassembled, and enough of the spare room cleaned up to make all of this possible--all while Scully, quite helpfully, superintended from the couch. By the time their friends left, it was getting rather late. Mulder thought his partner had already gone to bed when he carried his tired frame into the living room and prepared to crash for the night. "Mulder, it's not going to work for you to sleep on the couch. I'm usually out here during the day, and I can't have you moving all of my stuff every night." He straightened from rearranging the nest she had built on the couch and looked at her wearily. "Then I can just sleep on the floor in the other room." She stood with her arms folded and glanced over toward the room in question before answering. "No, that's the nursery. I want Mom to get it ready for the babies." "I could throw some blankets in the bathtub...." He was mostly kidding, but at this point he was really too tired to care where he ended up. "Don't you have an apartment yet? You keep running off in the evenings. I'm assuming you're looking for one. Unless you have a girlfriend on the side that you're not telling me--" "How about over there by the window? I could sleep with the fishes." She rolled her eyes as she realized his double entendre. Mulder threw out his hands in exasperation. "Look, Scully, if you don't want me here, then just say so." This deflated her a little. "No, Mulder, it's not that I don't want you here, I just...don't know where to put you." In response to her change in tone, he gentled his voice. "Then where would you like me to sleep?" "I guess..." She hesitated and looked around. "Well, I guess the bedroom's the only place that makes sense." His eyebrows shot up in surprise. "*Your* bedroom? And where are you going to sleep?" "Mulder, it's a queen-size bed. There's plenty of room for the two of us in there." The corner of his mouth twitched up mischievously. "Yeah, but is there room enough for four?" * * * After taking turns in the bathroom, the partners climbed awkwardly into their own sides of the bed, careful to maintain a respectable distance. When Mulder automatically turned on the TV, Scully didn't complain; she figured it was preferable to an uncomfortable silence between them. She was exhausted after the eventful day they'd had, and sleep quickly claimed her. Now, when she had made her offer of the new sleeping arrangements, Scully had already known that her partner didn't snore. But what she didn't know, and was about to learn, was that he had a sleep habit she would find even more annoying: Mulder was a cuddler. In her standard routine, she was woken after a couple of hours of sleep by a demanding bladder. The room was dark and the TV was quiet. It might have seemed like any other night--if it hadn't been for the arm draped over her distended belly and the rhythmic puff of warm air that tickled the back of her neck. After debating how best to handle this, Scully began to gently lift the arm, hoping to allow herself just enough room to slip out from underneath it. But the plan backfired; no sooner had she taken hold of Mulder's hand than he tightened his fingers around hers and clutched her more securely. "Don't go." It was only a mumble, and she suspected that he wasn't fully awake. "Mulder, your children are pressing on my bladder. Unless you wore your swim trunks to bed, I suggest you let me up." "Mmm, sorry" was slurred in her ear, and she was afraid that he wasn't alert enough for her comment to register. But a moment later, the arm finally lifted and she felt his weight shift away behind her. Without looking back to see if he was awake, she clambered out of bed and made a beeline for the bathroom. Scully hoped this would be an isolated incident, but she soon found that it was just the beginning. * * * Kicking didn't work. Neither did elbows. It was inevitable: no matter how many times during the night Scully pushed him away, she always woke later to find Mulder snuggled up behind her or half-draped over her. Mysteriously, though, when morning came, he was always back on his own side of the bed. He seemed completely unaware of what he'd been doing during the night, and since he always woke up disentangled, there was no evidence besides Scully's own testimony. As much as she wanted to confront him about it, she was too embarrassed to initiate a conversation on late night cuddling lest he tease that she had just imagined it all. Once she resigned herself to the situation, however, she came to another realization: Mulder offered wonderful back support. She discovered this the first time she stopped pulling away from him and let gravity, and his strong arm, settle her back against his sturdy frame. After that, she decided never to complain about it again. In fact, she started to get disappointed when she woke up in the morning to find him back over on his side of the bed. It was on one of these mornings that Scully lay on her side watching her slumbering partner. He was on his back, and his face was turned toward her slightly. One arm rested on his chest, and the other was somewhere beneath the covers. In recent days, she had spent so much time getting frustrated with his intrusions into her territory that she had almost forgotten the many things that drew her to this man like a moth to a flame. He really was such a beautiful person, and more than just physically. She knew she hadn't been easy to live with lately, and yet he was still here whenever she needed him and seldom complained. Not for the first time of late, Scully contemplated the gradual changes to their relationship and what impact parenthood would have on them. Here was her partner, in bed next to her, and she couldn't help but smile ruefully at the ironies: they were sleeping together, but they couldn't have sex; they were living together, but they weren't married; they were having children together, but they were just colleagues. Scully sighed internally and thought to herself, *How fucked up are we?* As a girl, when she had dreamed about what her life would look like when she was expecting her first child, it certainly looked nothing like this. But that didn't stop her from daydreaming sometimes about the what-ifs and might-have-beens. Even though she had long ago given up on the fantasy, part of her still pined for the white picket fence, the big house with a big yard, a tree house in the back for the kids to play in.... But for them, it was not meant to be. The motion on the other pillow rescued her from continuing that line of thought. A pair of hazel eyes slowly blinked open at her. Once they had come into focus, a lazy smile greeted her. "Hey." She couldn't help but return his smile. "Hey, yourself." "What time is it?" "Early." "Mmmm." The eyes slipped closed again as he turned onto his side to face her and nestled back into the pillow. "Mulder?" "Hmm?" "I'm sorry I've been such a bitch lately." His eyes popped open again, and he perused her face before answering. "Scully, I could never call you a bitch--so it's a good thing you said it first." She cocked an eyebrow and one corner of her mouth at his veiled insult. But she let it go and soon sobered. "I'm just--" "Bored, and uncomfortable, and crowded--both inside and out." "And tired, and cranky, and worried." His brow furrowed, and he moved in a little closer. When he spoke, it was in an intimate tone. "Worried? About what?" She looked away for a moment, but when she met his eyes again, she made the choice to trust him with her secret concerns. "Oh, about...everything. I have too much time to think. I worry about the delivery, and I worry about juggling two newborns, and I worry about teething, and schooling, and driving lessons, when to teach them about sex, and how to keep them from having sex--" "Hey, we're great role models for that one. We'll just tell them that babies are made in test tubes." Glaring at him, she deadpanned, "Okay, *I'll* be in charge of the sex education." "Well, I think that's just a given, considering how your choice of visual aids would compare to mine." She shook her head at him. Her expression quickly shifted, and she propped up on an elbow to ask: "Speaking of your visual aids, do you still have them?" Mimicking her position, he waggled his eyebrows at her. "Why, you looking for something to watch?" She rolled her eyes. "No. My mother's been cleaning up the nursery, and I'd just like a little warning if she's going to come across a box of X-rated movies." "I think your mother already knows where babies come from." She was about to reply, but when her mouth opened, a surprised "Oh!" came out instead. A hand immediately flew to her abdomen. Mulder sprang up and closed the distance. "What? What is it?" She heard his anxiety and hastened to reassure him. "Nothing. One of the babies kicked. I was just a bit surprised--I thought they were sleeping." The panic on his face melted away, soon replaced by the look of wonder he got whenever he heard about the babies moving around. Scully knew that he wanted to touch her, to feel their motion, and she was amazed that even now he was timid about it. She helped him out by reaching for his hand and placing it on her abdomen. "Right there. Feel it?" "Yeah." His face broke out into a wide grin. They both remained quiet and enjoyed the moment. In the midst of all the chaos and frustrations, simple moments like this were rare. "Oh, no. No no no. Not there!" "What? Scully, what's wrong? What did I do?" "No, not you--them. They're kicking at my bladder. Mulder, move!" Still a bit stunned, he quickly pulled back to give her room and watched as she rolled out of bed and practically sprinted for the bathroom. He had no idea she could still move that fast. When he recovered enough to realize the humor of the situation, he called out after her, "Need any help in there?" There was no reply, but she did seem to close the door a little more forcefully than necessary. *********** *********** Title: Great Expectations: Chapter 12 - Bears and Tables and Bunnies, Oh My! Author: Emily Sim *********** Mulder whistled softly as he fumbled with briefcase, take out bags and keys, finally managing to get the key inserted and the door opened. The apartment was dark and silent. "Honey, I'm home." He let go of his briefcase and dropped the keys into the tray on the hall table. Turning on the lights and taking a quick look as he made his way to the kitchen to set down the containers of food confirmed that the living room was empty. He made his way down the hall to the bedroom, becoming alarmed when Scully wasn't curled up asleep in her bed. He turned back around, cell phone out and already dialing her mother when he heard her call him. He snapped the phone closed and pushed open the door to the spare room. "Scully, don't do tha--" he was brought up short by the sight of a rumpled and sleepy Scully. The frame for the spare bed was still propped against one wall but the mattress was now on the floor. The two cribs were partially made up with bedding and bumper pads. He was getting good at knowing his baby paraphernalia. Scully was unsuccessfully trying to get up off the mattress. "I'm sorry, I must've fallen asleep." "Scully, you what do you think you're doing? You're not supposed to be moving things." Concern gave way to tightly controlled anger. "You're not even supposed to be out of bed. Why is the mattress back down on the floor?" "Can you help me up please?" He bent down and awkwardly put his arms around her, helping her up. She was warm and soft, her face flushed, hair a mess, and her cotton pajamas wrinkled. Those must've been a Mrs. Scully purchase; the only pajamas he recalled her wearing were those silk men's style ones. These were -- cute. If he weren't so pissed off -- "_Mulder_." It was obvious from the irritation in her voice that she had been trying to get his attention. "What?" "You can let go now." "Oh. Sorry. Hold on a minute. I'm not the one who should be apologizing here." "I didn't move anything, Mulder. Frohike came by with that --" she gestured to a changing table he hadn't noticed. It was crammed between the two cribs. A matching changing table, he noted. "Whatever possessed him to buy a changing table?" He tried to keep the disappointment out of his voice. He'd finally gotten over Bill buying the cribs, and now Frohike of all people had bought a changing table. He was going to send an email to all their friends asking them to leave the furniture buying to him. "_Mulder_. You keep spacing out on me. Did you hear what I just said?" "Sorry, I didn't." "He just showed up with it this morning. What was I supposed to say? No thanks, already have one? He took the time to find one that matches the cribs. And be thankful he only bought one." "It was very _sweet_ of him, I know. But why?" "I don't know. I didn't ask. Maybe he's trying to make up for that -- that thing that passes for a monitor?" "Hey, what's wrong with the monitor?" "Mulder, I'm betting Frohike hid a video recorder in that thing." "Frohike? Never! But that still doesn't explain all the --" his gesture included the whole room. "I certainly wasn't going to let him put it together without someone watching, and since you weren't here that meant me. He takes bed rest as seriously as you do. He was going to put the bed together again, but I convinced him the mattress alone would be fine. You can hardly turn around in here." "So, this isn't you telling me that you want me out?" "Out?" "Of your bed? She blushed. "And give up those back rubs? Not yet." "That's good to hear. I don't think I could handle a flashback to my early twenties camping out on the floor dorm style. I'm getting to be an old man now, Scully." "You try carrying around this extra weight if you want uncomfortable." "So, Frohike decide to channel Martha Stewart?" He fingered one of the quilts hanging over the crib rails. "No, I did that. And before you get mad, I stopped almost right away, which is why they're unfinished. Are you done interrogating me now?" "Did you get a chance to talk to Bill?" "Yes. Yes I did." "And?" "And what? I said thanks, he said you're welcome." "You're welcome to both of us, or you're welcome to just my baby sister and have you got rid of your asshole partner yet?" "He didn't call you an asshole, I think he used the word --" "Never mind, I don't want to know what he called me." "Bill's coming around. We just need to give him time." "Scully, if time was all he needed I'd be happy to give it. Your brother won't be happy until I am out of your life." He gave her a gentle push to the door, turning to look at the room one more time. "It really is crowded in here, isn't it?" "And crowded in here." She rubbed her abdomen. "Scully?" He turned off the light and shut the door behind them. "Hmm?" She turned around. "I should probably grab my robe or something to throw over these. And comb my hair. God, I must look a mess." She self-consciously wrapped her arms around herself. "Scully," he took hold of her arms, "you look beautiful." And then, because he couldn't help it, he kissed her. It was quick and not-quite-on-the-lips. Before she could protest he turned her back around and pushed her towards the kitchen. "And besides, these pajamas with the --" he laughed. "They're bunnies and bears, Scully, cute little pink bunnies and blue bears." "Mulder." "Shutting up now." He paused, and then said, "Scully?" "What _now_?" He was about to feed her another smart remark, but stopped himself. Her face was still flushed and her eyes -- God, they sparkled. She -- glowed. It was true, pregnant women did glow. "Forget it; it was nothing, Scully." He passed her one of the takeout bags. Except I love you, he added silently. ************ Scully rubbed her eyes. It was dark outside, which meant it was still early morning. She wasn't sure which had woken her, the phone call she could hear or the insistent pressure on her bladder. She rolled herself over awkwardly and sat up slowly. One of these days she was afraid she wouldn't get up fast enough and end up peeing the bed. By the time she made it out to the living room Mulder was disconnecting a call on his cell phone. "I thought I heard you up. Did I wake you?" "You and my bladder. Who's calling this early in the morning? Is everything all right?" "That was your mom. She won't be able to go with you today, so she was seeing if I could. Someone at the church had an accident and broke her hip. Your mom pulled the morning shift, and she wanted to get me before I left for work." "Why didn't she just call me?" "She didn't want to wake you. Or get you out of bed, which you are. Get off your feet, Scully. Please? Okay?" He scooted over and patted the spot beside him. She lowered herself awkwardly to the couch. "God, this was stupid. I won't be able to get up again." "Here." He grabbed one of the extra pillows and pulled her closer. "You can use my lap, just go back to sleep. I promise to help you up later." "You're assuming I was sleeping." She stretched out as best she could. "Bad night?" She opened her mouth to deny it, but was stopped by another dull pain in her lower back. One of the surprises in this awkward living arrangement was how deeply Mulder slept. She worried a little that when the big moment came she wouldn't be able to rouse him. "Where does it hurt?" "Back." She blew a breath out as the pain subsided and felt his hands slide down to rest along her lower back. "And I can't seem to get comfortable, even with that fancy body pillow. Which is back in my bed." "I'll get it." "Don't bother. I spend more time trying to fit my body around it than I do sleeping with it." "Here, try this." She felt him reach around her and with some maneuvering he managed to tuck two of the throw pillows under her, supporting the bulk of her stomach. He placed another pillow under her leg and began to massage her lower back. "That feels good. I swear one of the babies is using that spot to test out its leg strength." She closed her eyes and allowed her body to relax. This wasn't the first time Mulder had done this for her; he was getting good at figuring out where to rub. She just wanted to get a few more hours of sleep, and allowed his firm touch and the warmth of his body against hers to lull her to sleep. ************ "Everything looks good, Dana." Susan wiped the gel off Scully's stomach. "You can get dressed while I gather the information I have for you. Should I have Lisa call your mom in?" "She's not here today; she got called to look after one of the older parishioners this morning." "Don't tell me you drove here? I thought I was clear on how important it was that you take it easy, Dana." "Relax, Susan. I had Mulder bring me. Between him and my mother I can't pee without someone asking me what I'm doing up. It's driving me crazy." "It won't be for too much longer. Do you want me to ask him to join you then?" Scully sighed. "You might as well. He'll pester me for details the entire ride back otherwise." "Okay. I'll let you get dressed and have Lisa get Mulder." The door closed softly behind her. Scully pushed herself up and slowly slid off the table. Her stomach still felt sticky, but at least Susan kept the room at a decent temperature. She quickly pulled her pants up and slipped her sneakers on. She'd have to wait to get Mulder to tie them for her. God, she hated this part of being pregnant. She longed for her independence back. And the ability to go fifteen minutes without needing to pee, or feeling like she needed to. She wasn't sure which was worse. There was a soft knock on the door. "All ready?" The door opened and Susan poked her head in. "Yes. If you consider this --" she indicated her maternity sweats, "an appropriate replacement for a suit." "You're just ticked you can't wear those ridiculous heels of yours. Come on into my office. It'll be a little more comfortable." "Comfortable is negotiable these days." She followed Susan out the door. Mulder was already seated, his nose buried in a pamphlet, when she entered with Susan. "That's not your usual brand of entertainment, Mulder." She peered over his shoulder. "Lamaze and The Cesarean Section. A bit of an oxymoron, isn't it?" "Actually, Dana, that's one of the things I wanted to speak to you about." Susan settled herself behind her desk. "A section, Susan? I thought you said that it wasn't a given, that it might be avoidable?" Scully heard the whine in her own voice and hated it. "It doesn't sound all that bad, Scully," Mulder set the pamphlet on the desk. "It says you can use Lamaze techniques until they administer the epidural. And no cone head." "That's in a planned C-Section, Mulder. I'm not _planning_ on delivering that way. And the cone head isn't permanent." "You mean they won't be able to wow the senior class with their aluminum can crushing abilities?" "Can I say something?" Mulder and Scully, mumbling apologies, turned to face Susan. "Thank you. Now, I know we're not planning a section, Dana, but I would like you to be prepared for it. It won't be possible for you to attend Lamaze classes, so I'd like to send you home with one of the videos I have." Susan placed the tape in front of her. Scully poked at it. A perfectly posed couple smiled back at her. The woman didn't have chipmunk cheeks and swollen ankles. And her partner with the perfect hair was sickeningly happy looking. "Why can't I go out to a class?" She wondered if petulant was better than whining. Scully tried to listen as Susan answered her question and outlined the pros and cons of a planned section versus an emergency one. She found her focus drift to watching Mulder, his gaze intent as the details regarding epidurals and general anesthetics unfolded and Susan provided brochures for them to read. He had a small mountain of them growing in front of him. She was glad he was listening as closely as he was because all she could think about was how badly she needed to pee _again_. And how hard it was going to be to get up off the chair. And her shoes were still untied. And she didn't want to have a C-Section, even if it meant being awake and not being able to feel a thing. She preferred to be the one doing the cutting. "Scully?" "Huh?" "You zoned out there, partner. Susan was suggesting --" "Yes, about the Cesarean. Do I have to decide now?" "No, you don't have to decide now, Dana. But I want you to seriously consider it. With your size and the problems you've had to date it would be wise. I've included some information for you to read. It's --" Susan chuckled "with Mulder's little pile." "God, Susan, you don't know what you've unleashed there. He'll be quoting that stuff to me for the next two weeks." "I'd like to see you at the end of the week, Dana. And if Mulder is going to be in the room it might be an idea to include him at the appointment." "In the room?" Mulder couldn't help the tinge of panic in his voice. He hadn't really thought about the actual delivery details. It was a topic he worked hard at avoiding. He knew the mechanics of birth, knew it was a messy business, but realizing he would be experiencing all that for himself was a little daunting. Sticking his fingers in alien goo was less frightening. He wasn't sure which was worse, a regular vaginal delivery, or watching someone root around inside Scully. He absently shook Susan's hand and said his thank-you. They were almost to the front desk when he spoke again. "Drugs." "Pardon me?" Scully stopped and turned. "I want drugs if I have to be in there." "You want drugs?" "Just to take the edge off." "Mulder, look at me. _I_ am having the baby. I get the drugs." "You're a cruel woman, Dana Katherine Scully." "Just tie my shoe laces, would you please?" ************* ************* TITLE: Great Expectations 13: Size Doesn't Matter AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: Scully's discomfort increases daily, so Mulder comes up with a plan. * * * All was quiet on the home front when Mulder made his way into the apartment, but it didn't take long for him to catch sight of Scully, nearly doubled over on the edge of the couch. Her face was hidden by her hands and her shoulders were shaking from barely audible sobs. Panic seized him, and in just a couple of long strides, he was kneeling in front of her. "Scully, what is it? What's wrong? Are you in pain?" Her head shot up to reveal a red, splotchy face overwritten with surprise, as though she hadn't heard him come in. The shock quickly wore off and her expression began to crumple again. Instinctively, Mulder reached out to stroke the misery from her face, which was all the invitation she needed to throw her arms around his neck and bury her face in his shoulder just as her sobs started anew. "It's okay, I'm here now." He spoke gently into her ear while his hands stroked up and down her back to soothe her. Although he was trying to sound calm for her sake, he felt anything but. "Can you tell me what's wrong? What's happened?" He listened patiently to Scully's hitched breaths while she tried to regain enough control to speak. Eventually she was able to squeeze out: "I'm just so tired." Now that Mulder realized the crisis was not medical but emotional, his heartbeat finally started to return to normal. "I know. I'm sorry you're stuck here like this--" "No, Mulder." She pulled back so he could see her face, even more red and puffy than when he had first walked in. "I just want to sleep. I'm so tired and I just want to sleep. But I can't...." Another sob escaped, and she stopped talking until she could get herself back under control, although the tears continued to drip down her face one by one. "I can't get comfortable. My back aches, and my hips are sore, and I'm supposed to lay on my left side for the circulation, but I can't, I just can't lay on the same side hour after hour because it makes my shoulder hurt, and--" She stopped long enough to draw in another hitched breath. "And the babies keep poking me, and I just want to sleep, but I can't. I just can't." Leaning forward, he closed the distance and drew her back into his arms, partially because he was trying not to smile and knew better than to let her see that. He thought, if Scully weren't so tired right now, she might see the humor in her current behavior, but he knew she would need a little more distance from this moment before she could share that perspective. "Oh, God, Scully. I'm so sorry. But we'll see what we can do, okay? There's got to be some way to help you sleep." "Okay." Her voice was small and distant, muffled by his shoulder, so trusting like a little girl who believed that he really could make the monsters go away. It sounded so unlike his Scully, but he imagined that he himself might regress a few decades if he felt as exhausted as she obviously did right now. When he felt her relax in his arms and her breathing even out, Mulder pulled back and placed a kiss on her forehead. "Why don't we start with a change of venue, okay? Let's get you back to bed." Scully didn't protest but let him help her stand slowly and shuffle back toward the bedroom. Once she was settled on the mattress, he stepped into the bathroom and returned a moment later with a damp washcloth. She remained silent while he sat down next to her and gently washed her face with the cool cloth. Afraid that her quietness meant she was closing off again, perhaps a bit embarrassed about her outburst, he made quick work of his ministrations and did his best to return to "partner mode." When he finished, he pulled back but didn't get up yet. "I don't suppose I could talk you into taking anything?" "You know better than that." He nodded in concession. "Can I get you anything? Warm milk? A vat of chocolate? Pickles and ice cream?" The corners of her mouth twitched, but the exhaustion still dominated her features. "No. I've already tried everything I could think of." She paused. "Think it's too soon to ask for an epidural?" Mulder chuckled. At least she still had her sense of humor. "That bad, huh?" "No, not that bad, I guess. I'm not in pain, just supremely uncomfortable. Nice to know it'll only get worse." He gave her a sympathetic look and then leaned over and kissed her forehead again. "Why don't you try to rest for a while? I'll do some research and see if we can find a solution that doesn't involve knocking you out until it's all over with, okay?" "Mmm, inducing a coma sounds just fine to me. Let me know if you figure out how." He smiled at her as he rose and headed for the door. "Well, there's always the Vulcan nerve pinch." She just grunted in reply, her eyes now closed and her face half-buried in the pillow. He closed the door gently behind him and headed off to find a remedy. Come hell or high water, he'd find a way for her to sleep comfortably tonight. * * * Scully was sprawled across the couch again when Mulder later returned. Rest still eluded her, but at least her morale was slightly better. Muting the TV while he entered, she was about to ask where he'd been, but she was struck dumb as she watched him struggle through the doorway with two oversized shopping bags. Once he was through and had kicked the door shut behind him, he turned to her and triumphantly lifted the two bags at his sides. "Pillows!" He was obviously quite proud of himself. "What?" In her tired confusion, she didn't quite understand his excitement about this. He just smiled at her and carried the bags straight to the bedroom, answering her as he passed: "Pillows. Just give me a few minutes to get the wrappers off, and I'm sure you'll want pillowcases on some of them." Scully was too weary to try to follow his logic, so she just turned the sound back on and continued to channel surf. A few minutes later, Mulder reemerged from the bedroom and gently removed the remote from her hand to cease the surfing and click the power off. After dropping the device onto the coffee table, he extended both hands to her in invitation; she accepted and allowed him to help her to her feet and back to the bedroom. Once they reached the doorway, she stopped and took in the sight before her: "Pillows." There were indeed pillows, of every shape and size, covering every inch of the bed. Some were large bed pillows, others were small throw pillows, and there were even a few oddly shaped orthopedic pillows, all displayed like a haphazard brood around her large body pillow. Mulder certainly never did anything halfway. Having finished her perusal, Scully turned toward him and raised an eyebrow, eliciting a chuckle at her skeptical response. Nudging her forward, he guided her to the side of the bed. "I know this may not be a cure for all your ills, but it's the best solution I could come up with that didn't involve drugs or alien technology. And, best of all"--he took up two pillows and shifted them along his body to illustrate as he spoke--"they're adjustable." She couldn't help but laugh at his antics. Mulder was trying so hard to be helpful, and his enthusiasm for this solution was no less than if he'd been explaining to her that vampires really do exist. As usual, his faith was contagious, and she started to believe that maybe this would be the cure for her problem. "Here--" He pushed a few pillows out of the way and helped her sit and then lie back on the bed. It took them almost 15 minutes to find an arrangement that she was finally happy with, but it eventually led to Scully lying on her side in the center of the bed with an assortment of pillows stuffed under her head, neck, and ankles, between her knees, and pushed up against her on every side. They both knew that it would take nearly as long for her to find her way out when she'd have to go to the bathroom in half an hour, but neither of them wanted to mention that at the moment. When she was finally settled, Mulder kissed her on the cheek and headed for the door, turning off the light on his way out. Since it was only a little after 8:00, Mulder figured he'd let Scully rest while he washed the dinner dishes they'd each left in the sink and then finished reading the article that Byers had e-mailed to him. But he'd barely stepped into the hall when he heard her call out behind him: "Mulder?" He left the light off as he poked his head back in the doorway. "Yeah?" "Um, I have a problem." "Do you need help getting up?" He feared that her bladder was already protesting its capacity. "No, but...." The muted light pouring in the doorway illuminated her face enough for him to see her uncertain expression as he approached. "What is it?" "The pillows behind my back won't stay in place. I can hold on to the ones in front, but the ones behind me...." Reaching around behind her, Mulder tried to wedge the pillows in tighter. "Is that better?" "Well, kind of, but not really...." She was clearly hesitant to say what she wanted to. "I can't help you if you don't tell me, Scully." There was a pause, and then she asked timidly, "Can you stay here and hold the pillows in place?" The little girl voice was back. He smiled at her tentative request and replied gently, "Of course I can. Just give me a minute." After sweeping through the apartment to lock up and turn off the lights, Mulder returned to the darkened bedroom and stripped down to his boxers and t-shirt before climbing into bed behind his partner. Between her bulk and the mountain of pillows, there was very little room for him on the mattress, but he wasn't about to tell her that. Spooning up behind her, he wedged the pillows firmly against her back--his derriere almost hanging off the mattress, even pressed up as close to her as he could get. "Better?" "Mmm. Much." He was pleased to finally hear contentment in her voice for the first time all evening. Even though sleep would be long in coming for him, he had no complaints about joining her in bed so early. Reaching over to rest his hand on her abdomen, he cuddled in as close as he could and listened to her breathing slow until she finally drifted off to sleep. Although proud that his mountain of pillows seemed to do the trick, Mulder couldn't help but be dismayed at Scully's latest tribulation. In most respects, it was a good thing that she had made it to almost 35 weeks without going into labor yet, but there seemed to be no end to her discomfort. He just wished there was something he could do to cheer her up. What he really wanted was to finish the nursery so he could finally show her the new house, but first, he had to get the cribs (*Bill's* cribs)--and the changing table (*Frohike's* table)--moved in, which was anything but simple considering the fact that Scully rarely left the apartment. But something had to be done. It was time to come up with a plan. * * * "Well, what do you think?" Maggie rotated slowly, taking another long look around the spacious living room. Calling this the "great room" would be an understatement, and the rest of the house was by no means shabby in comparison. A lifetime of naval housing had taught her to make any house into a home, but that never stopped her from dreaming about having a place of this size in which to raise her four children. When she completed her revolution, she was met with Mulder's anxious expression and hastened to reassure him. "Oh, Fox, it's beautiful. I just can't get over how large it is." Her praise seemed not to assuage him. "You think it's too much?" She contemplated her words carefully. "I think it's... quite a gift. I don't mean to pry, but are you sure you can afford this?" He gave half a shrug, and his eyes dropped to watch his hands nervously pick at a hangnail. "My father left me some property on Martha's Vineyard. It was about time I sold it. I know, I probably went a little overboard, but it's so hard to find a place with a sizeable yard around here, and when I saw this one, it had Scully--I mean Dana-- written all over it. It's just--I mean, I owe her so much, and giving her this is the least I could do, and I know it seems like a lot, but--I want the kids to have a nice place to grow up, and--" With a gentle touch to his arm, Maggie halted his rambling. She leaned in to meet his eyes and graced him with a warm smile. "It's a very thoughtful gift. I couldn't think of a better place to raise a family." Relief washed over his face, and his eyes began to twinkle with hope. "Do you think Dana will like it?" "I'm sure she'll love it. But are you ever going to tell her?" Now his eyes truly lit up, and he answered with enthusiasm, "Actually, that's why I asked you to meet me here. I have a plan." Maggie knew enough about her daughter's partner to be slightly worried by this. He apparently read her concern and hurried to explain himself. "You see, Scully's been so down lately that I thought we should do something to cheer her up, like a shower." "A baby shower?" Mulder's exuberance waned slightly at her dubious tone. "Yeah. I mean, there's nothing better to raise your spirits than a surprise party, right?" Pacing toward the window, Maggie shook her head slightly. "Oh, Fox, I don't know. I thought it would be better to wait until after the babies were born." He stepped toward her, recapturing her gaze. "I know you're worried about her overdoing it--so am I--but she really wouldn't have to do anything but sit back and receive the gifts. Look, I've even got this great recliner." He eagerly plopped into the overstuffed leather chair behind him and popped out the foot rest to demonstrate. "She can just sit here with her feet propped up. Plus, it has a cup holder." "So, you're thinking about having it here." She wasn't so sure about this "plan." Mulder gave up on wrestling the arm rest closed over the cup holder and stood back up. "Yeah, that way we can set it up without her knowing. I'll have some guys come over to the apartment and move the cribs while we're at the appointment on Friday, so the nursery will be finished when she sees it. Then, on the way home, I'll bring her here instead, and, 'Surprise!'" "Are you going to tell her about the house first?" "Well, uh, no. I thought I could break that news after she's seen the inside. Besides, I figure she can't really blow up at me if I tell her in front of an audience." He smiled at her sheepishly. She had to admit, he did have a point there. * * * "Scully, are you ready yet? We really need to go." The jingling of keys only accentuated the impatience in Mulder's voice. "I can't find my shoes," she called out to him from the bedroom. He appeared in the doorway a moment later. "Just grab a pair. You've got a whole closet full of them." She halted in her process of pivoting and scanning the room--all that she could do in her current condition--and glared at him. "No, Mulder, I can't wear just any pair. My feet are so swollen they're the size of an elephant's. The only shoes I can fit into are my sandals." "They probably got pushed under the bed." He tilted sideways to look under the edge and then noticed her trying to do the same. "You need to sit down. C'mon." With a hand on her back, he gently ushered her out of the room and toward the front door. One of the dining room chairs was sitting next to the coat rack, where it had taken up residence when Maggie was mopping that morning. He guided her to the chair and turned her so she could sit. "Just wait here and I'll go get your shoes." "Well, hurry up. We're running late." "Didn't I just say that?" he muttered on his way to the bedroom, just loud enough for her to hear. Rolling her eyes at him, Scully shifted in the chair, trying to get more comfortable. She didn't want to lean back because it would be more difficult to get up, but the hard, wooden surface wasn't doing her lower back any favors. It seemed like the aching was getting worse, probably because she continued to add on the pounds each week, so she was eager to discuss this with her doctor. If only Mulder would hurry up. A small sound at the front door drew her attention away from the muffled curses emanating from the bedroom. The noise was like a soft scratching or clicking, not on wood, but on metal. It was almost like...a lock being picked. Standing carefully, she shuffled over to the door. Her first instinct was to look through the peephole, but that would require shifting her weight forward to stand on her tiptoes, and throwing off her center of balance generally wasn't a good idea these days. She didn't have a gun handy, and yelling for Mulder would scare off the intruder. The one thing she had going for her was the element of surprise, so she decided to use it. When the door swung open, it was hard to tell which of them was more stunned, Skinner leaning over with a lock pick in his hand, or Scully staring down at his shiny head. "Sir?" "Uh, Agent Scully." He straightened quickly, hiding his hands behind his back as if that could make the evidence disappear. "Why are trying to get into my apartment?" His mouth opened once, then twice, but no words came forth. Then his eyes shot past her, and she heard Mulder answer from behind her. "I, uh, told him he could stop by to pick up some files, and, uh, that he shouldn't knock because he might wake you up." Scully turned and took in Mulder's desperate look, and then glanced back at Skinner's guilty one. "Uh, uh. I'm not buying it." "Listen, Scully, we're already late, so why don't we go and I'll tell you about it on the way." One of Mulder's hands was occupied with her shoes, but the other was free to land on her back and gently tried to nudge her out the doorway. "No." Scully pivoted away from him and took a step back to perch on the chair. "We're not going anywhere until somebody tells me what's going on here." Her arms crossed over her chest to emphasize her point. A tense silence ensued. Mulder ran his free hand through his hair and let it rest on the taut muscles at the base of his neck, while Skinner uncomfortably shifted his weight from one foot to another. Eventually, the stalemate was too much for their boss. "Maybe I should just wait outside." When there was no answer, he decided to follow his own suggestion and stepped back into the hall, pulling the door shut after him. Scully breached the silence. "Mulder?" Avoiding eye contact, he sighed and responded, "It was supposed to be a surprise, Scully." "I don't like surprises." He turned once more to face her, weighing his options before announcing: "We're having a baby shower." "And Skinner came over to help set up?" The incredulity was plain in her tone. "Uh, yeah." She perused his face with an interrogator's gaze. "You're telling me that our boss left work early to come decorate for a baby shower." He nodded, but perhaps a little too enthusiastically. "Try again." Mulder deliberated and then revealed the next truth. "He came over to help move furniture." "What furniture? Are you saying you got an apartment?" "Not exactly." Yielding to the inevitable, he set down her shoes next to the chair and reached into his jacket to pull out a weathered envelope containing a set of pictures. He flipped through a few, hesitated, and then flipped through a couple more. Finally, he pulled one out and handed it to her. As her eyes took in the image before her, Scully gasped slightly. "Mulder, this is the nursery I wanted! I don't understand. Where is this?" He took a deep breath and dropped down on one knee to get closer to her eye level. "Scully, I...I bought a house." Her expression remained blank as she repeated the words back to him. "You bought a house." "I bought a house." Her lack of emotion kept him optimistic but also slightly on edge. Scully's eyes dropped to the picture in her hand and then met his again. "This is at the house?" He nodded hopefully. He thought she was taking this fairly well so far; but he soon found it was only the calm before the storm. "Do I get visitation rights?" "What?" Mulder was genuinely confused, not following her train of thought. "I know you're all adamant about your paternal rights, but I never agreed to joint custody. You can't just take my children away from me. They're living here." The tension in her voice increased with every syllable. He jumped in to reassure her. "No, Scully. You don't get it. The house isn't for me; it's for you--for you and the babies." Her brow crinkled in confusion. "But I already have a place to live. And a nursery." She gestured around her as she spoke, the picture still clenched in her hand. "Wouldn't you like a house? At least take a look at it before you reject the idea. I promise you'll love it." He held up the packet of photos for her. "And what if I don't?" Scully handed back the picture of the nursery, not bothering to reach for the others. "This isn't like buying toys or a piece of furniture. You're asking me to move somewhere that you decided on for me. Damn it, Mulder, do you even THINK about asking me before you make plans for my life? The next thing I know, you'll be telling me that we're already married and you just haven't bothered to tell me yet." "Scully--" "My God, Mulder, I--" She stopped suddenly and drew in a sharp breath, both hands flying to her abdomen. A moment later she leaned over, cradling her belly. The packet fell from Mulder's fingers, scattering its contents across the floor unnoticed; one hand flew to her shoulder and the other encompassed one of her own. "Scully, what is it? What's wrong? Do you want me to get the monitor?" She shook her head, but there was no "I'm fine" this time. The only sound she emitted was a cross between a groan and a whimper. "God, Scully, talk to me! What's going on?!?" Through her labored breaths, her response was so quiet that he barely made it out: "Sharp pain." "Mulder? Is everything okay?" Looking up in surprise, Mulder saw their boss standing in the open doorway, only then realizing that he'd raised his voice in his panic. But his attention soon returned to his partner. He'd seen her experience her share of contractions over the past few weeks, but never like this. "No, it's not. We need to get her to the hospital. Now." "I'll drive." Without another word, Skinner headed out the door. Mulder knew the car would be running and ready to leave the curb once they were outside. Without a second thought, Mulder got to his feet and swept Scully into his arms. Through his anxiety, his mind registered how light she seemed, even with her awkward bulk--but, he supposed, that could also be due to the overdose of adrenaline he was experiencing. As he settled her in his grip, she was able to get one hand wrapped around his neck, but the other remained firmly clutching her lower belly. The fact that she wasn't protesting any of this only alarmed him further. Not wanting her to know this, he made an effort to sound lighthearted. "Hey, Scully, you remember my panic face? I'm making it again." Her only response was to clasp him even tighter and whimper into his neck. "That bad, huh?" Rushing into the hallway, he hooked the door with his foot to kick it shut behind them, but he didn't really care whether it latched or not. There were more important things right now. "Hold on for me, partner. Just hold on." ********* ********* Title: Great Expectations: 14 - Autobiography in Motion Author: Emily Sim ************** Mulder had never been so exhausted in his whole life. And he wasn't doing any of the hard work. He'd also never felt so incredibly helpless. Inadequate. Deficient. He ran a dampened cloth across Scully's forehead. Her eyes were closed and for the moment she was resting. Moment was the key word here -- the moments were getting shorter and shorter, although it felt like years to him. She stirred and her blue eyes opened and focused on him. "Again." Mulder braced himself for the squeeze of death. That was how he'd begun to think of this new strength she seemed to have acquired in her hands. She gripped his with both of hers and he was amazed to find his still attached to his arm when the contraction was over. He leaned in close. "Try and relax, Scully. Breathe through it." She grunted in response and squeezed harder. They had been at this for too many hours now and Mulder wasn't sure if she could take any more. Hell, he wasn't sure if _he_ could take any more. Things had calmed down somewhat since their frantic arrival several hours earlier with what appeared, to both men anyway, to be a medical emergency. Thankfully, it wasn't anything more than a sudden start to her labor. The last two hours she had grown quieter, not having the energy to do more than lie back and close her eyes between contractions. He had an overwhelming urge to shove her over and tell her to relax, that he'd take over for a while. "Mulder?" "I'm right here, Scully." He flexed his fingers. "Make it stop." "Oh, Scully, I wish I could, Sweetheart." "I want to go home." She tried to push herself up, hampered by the monitors attached to her stomach and the IV in her arm. Mulder attempted to settle her back down on her side. "Just a little longer, Scully." "Again." He leaned in close hoping that speaking directly into her ear would help her focus on him and ride the contraction out. He gritted his teeth as her hand gripped his. God, she had a grip like a tire iron. Mulder was starting to get worried. Up until an hour or so ago the room had been Grand Central Station. Who knew the designation 'teaching hospital' meant every medical intern and wannabe from Annapolis to Capitol Hill was going to come by and have a look. He'd seen more of Scully in the last few hours than he wanted to. And he'd shared those viewings with far too many other people. He'd finally corralled the nurse assigned to Scully and read her the riot act. Complete with badge waving. The badge hadn't impressed her much, but his slightly manic tone must have, because she cleared the room citing distress to mom and baby. It didn't help matters that he felt ill equipped to support her. He'd done some reading on Lamaze, but they never did get the time to watch the video and practice all the heeing and hawing that went along with it. And they weren't fooling any of the nursing staff; they kept looking at him like he'd let everyone down. He wanted to tell them it wasn't his fault the babies decided to come early. "Mr. Scully?" The nurse tapped him on the shoulder. "Mulder." "I'm sorry?" She moved over to the machine that was silently keeping track of the babies' heart rates. "Never mind." He flexed his fingers in a bid to get the blood flowing again. The nurse inspected the sheet of paper the monitor spat out, and her furrowed brow was causing Mulder no small amount of distress. "Dana?" The nurse moved closer. "I'm going to give you a little oxygen and move you onto your left side, okay?" She turned to Mulder. "Mr. Scully --" "Mulder." "Pardon me?" "My name is Mulder." "I'm sorry. Mr. Mulder. If I could get you to help me turn her over," -- she gave him a smile he knew was meant to assure him -- "I'm going to go ahead and call Dana's doctor." "What's wrong?" "Mulder?" Scully's speech was slow and quiet. "What's going on?" "Just rest, Scully. I'm taking care of it." "Don't worry, Dana, Mr. Mulder, it's just a precaution. Your doctor left instructions asking us to call if there was any change, no matter how small, and the heart rate of one of the babies has slowed a little." "Mul -- " Another contraction left the sentence incomplete, and Mulder focused his attention on getting Scully through it while the nurse observed the monitor closely. "Well?" Mulder addressed the nurse. "That was a little better. Keep her on her left side; I'll just be a moment calling the doctor." "Good." He pulled out his cell phone and was about to dial when a disapproving noise from the nurse stopped him. He'd forgotten. He turned his phone off and put it away, reaching for the one in the room instead. Maggie had come and gone and was waiting for a call from him to make her way back when things started progressing. He had a gut feeling he should get her back now. "Fox?" "Yeah, it's me." "Is everything okay? Is it time?" "The nurse just left to call the doctor, one of the babies' heart rates dropped a little. She says it's nothing, but I don't know. Maybe you should head back soon." "I'm sure everything is ok, Fox. I'm on my way. Let her know." "Will do, Maggie." When he disconnected it was with a great sense of relief. He needed Maggie here as much as Scully did. He leaned close and her eyes fluttered open lazily when he brushed a kiss over her cheek. "Hmm?" "Your mom's on her way." "Good." "Can I get you anything? Ice chips? Back rub? Music --" "A house?" She appeared a little more alert. "Whatever possessed you to buy a _house_, Mulder?" "Hormones?" "Hormones, right. That's my line." "Don't worry about it right now, just rest while you can." "_You_ try resting. I just want -- oh -- Mul --" The words bled into a long gasp and an alarm sounded from the fetal monitor. She grabbed one of his hands in a mad scrabble as her face contorted in pain and she attempted to fold herself over. He watched the color drain from her face. Grabbing the call button, he pressed it frantically, but it wasn't needed. The alarm had apparently summoned the troops and the room went from a quiet place for the two of them to await the arrival of their babies, to what appeared to be a madhouse of doctors, nurses and equipment. He was unceremoniously shoved aside as the entourage surrounded the bed. It was a blur of activity. A doctor he'd never seen before approached him, the readout from the monitor in his hand. "Are you the dad?" Mulder nodded, his attempts to speak catching in his throat. A gentle but firm hand on his shoulder helped Mulder focus his attention on the doctor addressing him. "I know this is a little overwhelming. Lizzie, the delivery nurse assigned to your wife, is calling her doctor, but we'd like to go ahead and prep for a section. The babies' heart rates have both dropped, indicating some distress." Mulder may have been used to job pressure and the strain it brought, but it was no help when watching someone you love in a medical crisis. Scully was obscured by the melee of doctors and nurses and what he needed more than anything was to know that she would be okay, that the babies would be delivered healthy. Labor and delivery hadn't been a hot topic between them and he was afraid he was responsible for her early delivery with the way he'd handled the house issue. "Are you sure?" Mulder met the doctor's eyes, pleading for reassurance. "We need to get those babies out." "Okay." The doctor's response was immediate. Afterwards Mulder couldn't recall the exact sequence of events, nor who pushed him towards the washroom with a set of green scrubs to change into, but the arrival of Scully's doctor as they were wheeling her out of the room was exactly what he needed. The doctor's familiarity with both of them, and Scully's implicit trust in him, reassured Mulder that he was making the right decision when the doctor added his nod of assent to the procedure. Within moments, Mulder found himself in a small room outside the operating theatre, waiting for the nurse to take him to the scrub area so he would be allowed in. ****************** A nurse led Mulder from the scrub area to the operating theatre, pausing just outside the door. "Did you get a chance to do any reading with regard to the procedure?" "No, she still had a couple of weeks to go." "Dr. Marks ordered a spinal, so your wife will be conscious throughout the procedure, but she won't feel any pain. You will be allowed to sit with her, but we ask that you stay in the area indicated. Any questions?" "None." He was itching to get inside the room and his impatience must have shown. "Follow me, then." She led him into the operating theatre and to the head of the table where a stool was set up beside Scully. It was a surreal moment for Mulder. The bright lights were a sharp contrast to the low mood lighting they'd enjoyed in the birthing suite. And all the green -- from the matching outfits the doctors and nurses wore to the elaborate drapery surrounding his partner -- it was everywhere. "Dad, if you'd sit right there." The nurse who had led him in gave him a nudge. He was happy to oblige. He wasn't squeamish, but he wasn't exactly eager to watch them slice her open. He was glad to find Scully alert when he slipped onto the stool. "Hey, Scully, we match." He pulled at the surgical cap he wore, a duplicate of the one covering her auburn locks. "What's happening, Mulder?" He could hear the underlying concern in her voice. Everything about this pregnancy had been difficult for her, and he knew the hardest part of all was the loss of control she felt. "Hey," he leaned forward and kissed her softly on the cheek, "I recognize Dr. Marks in that mass of green fashion catastrophe so it can't all be bad. At least we're not stuck with Large Marge." The reference to the moniker they'd chosen for one of the least liked doctors in the HMO group garnered him a light laugh. "Can you see anything yet?" He ignored her question. There was a limit to what he'd do for her, and peeking over the screen was stretching that devotion. "Are you sure you can't feel anything?" "Dana," -- the doctor addressed her over the screen that separated them -- "I'm almost ready to deliver the first baby. You shouldn't feel anything more than some pressure." "I can't really feel it, but whatever they're doing feels like -- it's a strange sensation. I don't know how to describe it. Oh God, what are they doing down there? It feels like they're pulling my insides out." Mulder gripped her hand and leaned closer in a bid to distract her. "What do you think? Boys? Girls? Reticulans?" "The way they kick -- oh damn -- what was --" "Scully?" "Here we go. Ready or not." The doctor's voice was cheerful. "The first one's a girl." A wrinkled infant was briefly held above the screen and then promptly handed to one of the waiting nurses. It was another surreal moment in a day full of them. Mulder was trying to process what he had just seen when the doctor held up another infant, this one squalling, but equally streaked red and white. Blood and -- vernix pushed at his conscious. The white stuff was vernix. He thought he glimpsed hair of some sort, but the baby was whisked away too quickly for him to be sure. "A matching pair. Congratulations, Mom and Dad, you've got two beautiful daughters." The doctor's smile, hidden behind a green mask, was reflected in his eyes. Scully attempted to reach up and touch Mulder's face but was stopped by the straps holding her to the operating table. "You're crying, Mulder." A lone tear dropped onto her cheek as he leaned forward to kiss her. "Thank you." "Go make sure they're okay. Please?" "Okay." He patted her hand and, as he stood up, was met by one of the nurses. "Dad?" She touched him gently and indicated he could move over to where the babies were being examined. She then stepped in to take his place at Scully's head, while the doctors finished the procedure. He pointedly looked the other way as he crossed the short distance to the isolettes that housed the infants. It was scary, all the wires and tubes surrounding them. They both had oxygen masks obscuring their tiny faces, and the nurses were too busy calling out numbers and making notes to take much notice of him. He cleared his throat, reluctant to interrupt, especially if diverting their attention would compromise the care the babies needed. At the same time, he needed to know that everything was okay. "Here's your daddy now." One of the nurses stepped away to address him. "I know it's overwhelming at first. They're a little on the small side, but quite a good size for twins. The first one born weighed 5 lbs 4 oz. She's 19 inches long." "She's okay?" He pointed to the mask. "She needed some help to get started breathing, but that's not unusual. Both babies will probably overnight in the neonatal unit as a precaution. The oxygen you see both of them receiving is due to the deceleration - that's the drop in the heart rate - just before they were delivered. Her sister came in at 5 lbs 6 oz, and just under 19 inches long. She's the one you heard crying. They're fraternal rather than identical twins. I can let you hold them in just a minute. Tanya is just finishing up the second APGAR score." One of the nurses, who he assumed was Tanya, spoke up. "Baby number two is ready." Mulder was pulled closer and a tiny bundle wrapped in pink, her face still obscured by the oxygen mask, was gently settled into his arms. It was such an overwhelming feeling, he wasn't sure he could even identify what it was. Bliss? Joy? It went well beyond happiness and he felt like he was bursting with it. He brought the infant up close and inhaled her scent. It was unlike anything he'd ever smelled or experienced. A chair was shoved under him and a nurse propped a pillow under his arms, helping him settle the second infant against him. He was crying unashamedly, his arms and his heart full. "If you'd like, I can carry one over so your wife can see both at the same time. She seems anxious to see them. Then we need to take a third APGAR reading and have the specialist take a look." Mulder nodded his assent, reluctantly letting her take one of babies. Scully had indeed been anxious. In the background he'd twice heard the doctor and a nurse admonish her to stay put. The nurse removed the masks which, it turned out, weren't strapped on but had been more or less sitting loosely in front of their faces, before leading Mulder over to where Scully was still being attended to. "Here comes your new family, Dana." The nurse sitting on the stool vacated by Mulder stepped aside and allowed him to come closer with the first infant. Scully's eyes were wet with tears. "Can you bring her closer?" "They're beautiful, Scully." "Abigail." She softly kissed the baby's forehead. "It means joy." "Okay. Abigail it is. But we have a matched set here, Scully." He stepped back so that the nurse with Abigail's twin could move closer. "Just a minute or so longer, Mom and Dad. We need to take care of some things. Here's your mommy, little one." The nurse held the infant close enough that Scully could give the second baby a kiss as well. "You can name this one, okay?" "Amanda." He said it without hesitation. "Abigail and Amanda Mulder." "Mulder?" Her brow furrowed, but the nurse holding the newly named Amanda interrupted before she could say more. "Time to get the babies back." She led Mulder to the waiting nurses where both babies were settled back into the isolettes. A doctor had joined the three nurses and reached out to shake Mulder's hand. "Congratulations, Dad, I'm Dr. Wheaton. I'll be taking care of your girls while they're staying in the neonatal unit. Charlotte here will show you where the unit is and let you know all the procedural ins and outs. You can meet us up there in fifteen minutes or so." "What about Sc -- Dana?" "If you go with Charlotte, she'll fill you in on everything you need to know." "Okay." Mulder stepped back to where his partner lay. "They're kicking me out now, Scully." "I can't take you anywhere." "Just rest for a bit, while you can. I'll make sure everything's okay." "I think I will." She closed her eyes. "Thanks." This time the kiss he gave her landed squarely on her lips, but he wasn't sure if she was awake enough to realize it. He followed the nurse out of the room, anxious to make sure his girls were taken care of. _His_ girls. Oh my God. He was a father. A daddy to two tiny girls. Whom he had to protect from guys like -- shit. Like him. Mulder wiped his face and groaned, hoping like crazy that the poets were right and love would be enough. And big locks way up high that only he had the keys to. Suddenly the Lone Gunmen didn't seem so paranoid, and their security system didn't seem so silly. Frohike would think of something that worked. He relaxed. He had a few years yet. Lots of time for the Gunmen to come up with something. It then occurred to him that these two little angels were Mulders. God, he needed to get the boys on it now. ***************** ***************** TITLE: Great Expectations 15: Joy to the World AUTHOR: bellefleur SUMMARY: New parenthood brings new experiences. ************** Strains of music niggled at my consciousness, serenading me as I drifted awake. The tune was somehow familiar, but I couldn't quite figure out the words. It took me a minute to orient myself through the lingering haze of sleep and pain meds. When I shifted a little in the bed, however, the persistent ache in my lower abdomen quickly brought it all flooding back: hospital; C-section. The last few days had been a blur. I'd spent the majority of that time in bed trying to recover from the surgery, drowsing more often than not. At first, I had been resistant to taking pain medication because I worried that it would be transmitted through my breast milk. But the nurse eventually convinced me that the pain would only hinder my milk coming in, so I reluctantly agreed to take some ibuprofen. In the midst of all my sleeping, the only truly cogent memories I had were the precious moments each day that I spent in the neonatal unit visiting the "fruits of my labor," so to speak. It wasn't easy for me to get up and around, but I insisted on making the trip as often as I could manage. Although the girls were born healthy, they had been kept under close observation for the first 24 hours. By the second day, their bilirubin levels had become elevated, indicating jaundice, so they had to spend some time under bili lights until their levels dropped. It was frustrating not to have them in my room, but I just kept telling myself that the main priority was for all of us to get healthy, and then we would have plenty of time together once we got home. Elvis. For some reason I thought that was an Elvis song. But which one? As I became more alert, I realized who was singing. The tune may have been from Elvis, but the voice was definitely Mulder's. He was singing so quietly that I couldn't pick up more than snatches of the melody. Carefully rolling onto my side in the direction of his voice, I was met with the most precious sight I had ever seen: Mulder was sitting by the window rocking a tiny bundle in his arms and gazing down at her with complete abandon. As if that weren't enough to melt my heart, I finally recognized what he was singing: "...But I can't help falling in love with you." I don't know if I made a noise or he just sensed my eyes on him, but before long I saw him glance up at me. But his attention quickly returned to the baby. "Hey, guess who's awake? Do you want to go see your mommy?" He gently slid from the rocker and stood to approach me. At first, all I could make out through the layers of yellow blanket in his arms were two tiny fists waving in the air. "Who've you got there?" "Abby. The doctor gave her a clean bill of health, so I thought it was time for her to get out and meet the world." While Mulder took a seat in the chair by the bed, I shifted back a little to make room for him to put the baby next to me on the mattress. He gingerly set her down and then leaned in to shield her from the edge. The peach fuzz on Abigail's crown called out to me, and I gently stroked it with my fingertips. Amanda, unlike her sister here, had been born with a tuft of brown hair; I was secretly overjoyed that at least one of our girls would be spared the nickname "Carrots." But the jury was still out on this one. "Well, hello there, Abigail. Mommy's very happy to see you." I have no idea where that higher-pitched, goofy voice came from. I swore I'd never do this. Next thing you know, I'd be reverting to baby talk. But Abigail didn't seem to mind. She just blinked back at me drowsily. Mulder kept insisting that they both had my blue eyes, no matter how often I reminded him that it's a recessive trait and it would take time for their true eye color to develop. "Sorry we woke you. I was trying to be quiet." My goofy voice appeared again, unbidden. "Was your daddy singing to you?" I think we were both a bit surprised by how easily the title slipped off my tongue. It's not like this was new information. In fact, everyone around here seemed to know Mulder as "Dad." But there were just so many details that we hadn't quite sorted out yet--not least of all the full names on the birth certificates. As usual, "Dad" had a comeback. "I figured I'd better start them on Elvis early, before you corrupt them with Three Dog Night." I felt sure he was grinning at me, but I didn't look up to catch it; I was too bewitched by my daughter. "How's Amanda doing?" "She's still a little jaundiced, so they want to keep her in neonatal a bit longer. Your mom's in with her now. Hopefully by tomorrow night, we should be able to take them both home." Ah, yes--Home. We'd been avoiding that conversation for the last couple of days. I finally tore my eyes away to look up at him. "Mulder, I owe you an apology." "For what?" His nonchalant tone didn't deceive me. The fact that he was avoiding my eyes clued me in that he had a good idea what I was talking about. "For the way I overreacted about the house." "No, you were right, Scully. I should've talked to you about it first." "Well, I won't argue with that." One of Abigail's feet kicked free of her wrapping, and I watched while Mulder played with her tiny toes. It gave us both something to look at besides each other. "Mom told me all about the house. She said it's beautiful. Personally, I think she's hoping that we'll decide to stay at the apartment and give her the house instead." Mulder snickered, and I glanced up to meet his teasing eyes. "If she expects the twins to come with it, then no deal." I played along with him. "You think we should keep them, huh?" "After all the hard work I did? You betcha." "The hard work YOU did?" "Yeah, I managed not to pass out in the delivery room. You have no idea what hard work that was." I rolled my eyes at him, and he just laughed. Was it too late to hope that my daughters wouldn't inherit Mulder's sense of humor? Abigail's little fist stretched into the air as she released a big yawn, and I gave in to the temptation to intercept it. Her hand readily closed over the finger that I slipped into her palm. She had quite a grip. With some reluctance, I continued the conversation. "So, um, did Skinner move the cribs over to the house?" "Uh, no. I thought it would be best to wait on that." I tried to keep my tone light, but I couldn't entirely squelch my anxiety over what I was about to commit to. "Maybe you should give him a call, see if he's free tonight. It would be nice to have everything set up before we bring the babies home." "Scully." Mulder settled a hand on mine to catch my attention. "Are you sure about this?" If I hadn't already known my answer, the hopeful look in his eyes would have secured it for me. "Yeah. I am." God, I wish he'd smile like that more often. Or maybe I should be grateful that he doesn't because of the way it turns my insides to mush. My brain had just registered that Mulder was slowly leaning closer with his eyes fixed on my lips when we were interrupted by a gentle knock at the door. A woman I had seen floating around the maternity ward over the past few days was poking her head in. "Mr. and Mrs. Scully?" "Uh, I'm Dana. This is Mulder." "You can just call me 'Dad.'" As usual, he was beaming with pride when he said that. The woman came through the door and took a few steps toward the bed. "My name's Nancy Mason. I'm a lactation consultant here at the hospital. I heard that Abigail had come by for a visit, and I thought I'd see if you'd like some help getting her to nurse." "Yeah, if you don't mind." After several abbreviated attempts at breastfeeding in the neonatal unit and lots of pumping, I had my trepidations about how well this might work, but I was eager to try. Now that my milk was coming in, I hoped that things might start to go more smoothly. Mulder, however, apparently didn't share my eagerness; he was out of his chair like a shot. "Um, I should give you ladies some privacy. I'll just head down the hall..." "Hold up there, Dad. We're going to need your help." "My he-lp?" I think that's the first time I'd ever heard Mulder's voice crack. I might have found it rather charming--if he didn't look like a deer caught in the headlights. ************* "My he-lp?" My voice hadn't cracked like that since high school. Maybe that's because this scenario made me feel like an awkward teenager again. I didn't know a whole lot about nursing, but I did know one thing: breasts were involved. Naked ones. "Yes. It's especially important that you know how to help Dana get comfortably settled into the right position. The incision from the C-section will make it difficult for her to cradle the baby as she normally would, and she'll also need help with the lifting and carrying for the first few weeks." The consultant turned away from me and walked over next to Scully, close to the spot that I had just vacated. "There are two different positions that we usually recommend after a section. One is lying down on your side. Since you're already in that position, we'll try that one for now. The other is the football hold, which is particularly helpful if you want to try nursing both babies in tandem." Football hold? I suddenly got a flash of Brett Favre palming the pigskin and pumping it in the air, looking downfield for a receiver. That can't be what she was referring to. My confusion about this term quickly gave way to guilt; I felt responsible for my ignorance. For all of my avid reading about pregnancy and labor, you'd think I would know a thing or two about breastfeeding. But the fact was, only once had I opened a chapter on the subject, and after just one glance at the pictures, I'd slammed the book shut and couldn't go back. Now, I'm no stranger to pictures of naked breasts--therein lay the problem. How is a guy supposed to look at the pictures in that book, or read the words "nipple" and "suck" in the same sentence, and not get...titillated? It's just a natural response to a stimulus. But I'd felt like a schmuck about the whole thing, so I decided to avoid the topic entirely. I was really hoping this was one part of parenting that Scully could manage without me. So far, I'd been able to keep my distance from all the suckling going on around here, but now my luck seemed to have run out. Nancy was still talking, although I admit I wasn't paying much attention until she turned and looked right at me. "Dad, if you'll come over here, I'll show you how you can help Dana get settled with some extra pillows to keep her comfortable." "Pillows. I can do pillows." Maybe this would be easier than I thought. I felt the anxiety abate a little as I focused on this familiar task. I detoured over to the chair by the window where we had piled up some of our belongings over the last few days and extracted two pillows that I'd brought from our personal stash. Following Nancy's instructions, I maneuvered one pillow under Scully's head for extra support and the other between her knees, trying not to jostle her too much in the process. "It's also important to place pillows behind her back to avoid any stress on her abdomen. But, since we've run out of pillows for now, we can use you instead. If you'll just spoon up behind Dana here, that way you can provide back support and also have a bird's eye view of what we're doing." Okay, maybe this wouldn't be easier than I thought. Unlike my eager response to the woman's last request, I hesitated at this one, and apparently a little too long. She was frowning at me, probably wondering if she'd have to draw me a diagram. But Scully...she was looking back at me with such simple longing that I knew I couldn't say no. It was obvious how important this was to her. After all, this was an experience she'd thought she could never have. It was time for me to suck it up and do anything I could to make this happen. I made my way to the side of the bed, probably more slowly than I should have, but I was trying to get my breathing under control. Too bad we didn't master that Lamaze thing since it might have come in handy just about now. I slid into the standard spooning posture behind Scully, careful not to press up against her too much, which was almost impossible considering how narrow this bed was. We'd slept in this position so much in the past few weeks that it was like second nature, but recently there had been a wall of pillows between us. I don't know if Scully had ever caught on to the reason why I always rolled away from her before she woke up: I didn't think she'd appreciate finding my morning erection pressed into her back. Now that I was finally doing what I was supposed to, the ladies ignored me and continued their conversation, but I had tuned out again. I don't think either of them understood how hard this was for me (no pun intended). This wasn't just any woman we were talking about; it was Scully, the woman that I'd fantasized about undressing for years. It's not that I hadn't seen her naked before. In fact, during the labor, I'd seen a whole lot more of her than I think she ever intended. Then again, so did half the hospital. But this was so much more...intimate. And no matter what I kept telling myself, my Neanderthal male brain just couldn't get past the basic fact that I was about to get an up close view of Scully's bare breasts. "Mulder?" "Yeah?" By Scully's expression, I realized that Nancy must have said something that I was supposed to respond to. "Uh, sorry." I gave Nancy my full attention. "Since Dana's got her hands full, you'll need to help her get the gown open. This one unsnaps at the shoulder." Yeah. This was the part I was afraid of. Scully was dutifully tilting her head out of the way to give me clear access to the snaps, so I took a deep breath and launched in. It was a little awkward to get a grip on them from this angle, but I managed, only fumbling slightly in the process. So far, so good. I leaned back in relief at having accomplished that much, only to realize that both women were looking at me again. Oh. They wanted this thing open. I decided that the best approach was not to stare directly at IT. So, I got a grip on the fabric, looked over at the chair, and pulled back the flap. Then I started breathing again and quickly got my hands out of the way--but out of the corner of my eye, I caught the motion of the fabric falling right back into place. Even gravity was conspiring against me. "That's one of the drawbacks of this type of gown when you nurse lying down. We should see about getting you something different to wear." Nancy seemed to be talking more to Scully than to me, which was probably a good thing since I was having concentration issues. "For now, we should just tuck this flap inside to keep it out of the way." She said "we," but I could tell that she meant me. Scully was momentarily distracted by the baby, which made this a little easier. I decided to just go for it, and I tried not to acknowledge the sensation of my fingers brushing up against her other breast when I tucked the fabric up inside her gown. "There. Now, let's try getting Abigail to latch on with the technique I just described." I must have missed that part of the conversation. Anyway, Nancy seemed to be focused on Scully again, so I zoned out. I was trying with all my willpower to look anywhere except down at the expanse of milky white skin and rosy nipple that my peripheral vision traitorously insisted on seeing. "She's a natural." Nancy sounded pretty impressed by whatever had just happened. "Oh, Mulder, look at that." So I looked. And what I saw was more amazing than I had ever imagined. Our baby had her tiny mouth latched onto Scully's flesh and was suckling with gusto, eagerly drawing nourishment from her mother. In that moment, I had an epiphany--so *that's* what breasts were for. I had already known this, of course, at least cognitively. But this was the first time it really sank in. "Wow, she's really going to town." I leaned in for a closer look. "I guess she was hungry." I think Nancy said something to us, but I didn't hear it, fixated as I was on this miraculous sight. By the time I tore my eyes away to look up at her, she was gone. I guess she had left the room to give us some privacy or just figured we didn't need any more help. Scully and I watched quietly in awe while Abby contentedly fed. Over the years, my partner had never ceased to amaze me with her many talents and abilities, but this one took the cake. The very fact that her body had nurtured and developed these two little angels was astonishing enough, but for some reason, this part captivated me even more, maybe because it was something I could see with my own eyes. Of all the things Scully had experienced during the pregnancy, I can't say I envied her any of them, except only to have taken away her discomfort, but this--this was something I could easily grow jealous of. I realized she would have a bond with our children that I never could, but I would never begrudge her this experience. Watching this precious scene, and seeing the bliss on her face, only reminded me how much I loved her. When I leaned in, I really only intended to brush a kiss on Scully's cheek, but she must have noticed my movement because she turned her head. At first, I paused my approach, meaning to deflect with a joke. But then I saw those inquisitive eyes smiling back at me, and I decided to seize the moment and aim for her lips. This was more than just a quick peck. Her lips were so soft against mine that I wanted to linger there indefinitely, but I also didn't want to push my luck. After what was far too short a time, I started to pull back; I was surprised by the loud smack that followed. It took a moment to register that the sound didn't come from us. We both looked down at our little bundle of joy, who had apparently lost her solid grip on the nipple. "Come back here, little one." Scully's focus was once again on the baby, repositioning her to get back on task. I tried to tamp down my disappointment that yet another moment between us had been abruptly lost. At least it wasn't a bee this time. I figured, though, that I should get used to this. Raising two newborns was probably the worst time to start an intimate relationship with somebody. I could see why parents were supposed to have sex *before* they had kids. But since when had Scully and I ever done things the easy way? "Just open up for me, please?" The frustration in Scully's voice caught my attention. Only then did I realize this wasn't going as smoothly as it had before. Scully was having some trouble getting Abby to latch on. "Do you want me to go get Nancy?" "No, I have to figure out how to do this on my own. C'mon, sweetie, aren't you hungry anymore?" "Should we try switching sides?" "No, I need to save some for Amanda." "I guess it's pretty handy that you've got two of those things." The glare she fired at me was priceless. If our girls inherited their mother's expressions, I was really in for it. "Mulder, you're not helping." "Sorry." I could feel her tensing up, and I think Abby was starting to respond to it. I leaned in and spoke softly into Scully's ear, trying to soothe her. "Hey partner, why don't you take a deep breath? Just relax a little. I know you can do this." Thankfully, she didn't argue with me, and I felt her release some of the tension on a heavy breath. It took another couple of tries, but Abby finally got the hang of it. Settling my chin on Scully's shoulder, I admiringly watched our daughter continue to feed. As tiny as she was, she was perfect in every way, just like her sister. I knew they would grow up all too quickly, so I was trying to catalogue every sensation, every moment. Even for all the time I'd spent thinking about this, it was still hard to wrap my brain around one simple fact: there were two new beings in the world that were part me and part Scully. This was truly an X-File. *********** *********** Title: Great Expectations: 16 - The Homecoming Author: Emily Sim ************ "Slow down." "I'm not going fast." Scully tried to lean over and check the speedometer, but was frustrated by the still healing incision from her C-section. It was even more difficult to try and glimpse the two little bundles in the back. Twisting around was nearly impossible, though she didn't know what good it would do her; the babies were practically invisible with their seats facing towards the back. "Here." Mulder reached across and angled the rearview mirror towards her. "Oh!" She could see both babies reflected in mirrors attached to the headrests. "Wherever did you get the idea?" "Fisher Price. They are like gods of the baby world." "I love it." "They had something called an Auto Nanny Cam, but I wasn't sure I could get the thing wired right." "This is great." She smiled at the two sleeping babies, their faces barely visible underneath hats and blankets. "Do you think they're too warm?" "They're fine, Scully. Relax." "How can I relax when you're speeding?" "Speeding? Scully, I'm doing 20. If I don't pick it up the guy behind in the Yukon might just ram me." Scully adjusted the pillow underneath the seat belt. She was still sore and moving around was only aggravating things. Leaning back, she closed her eyes; getting from the hospital to the van was exhausting. The van was a shock. Mulder had more surprises up his sleeve than David Copperfield. "What else did you buy?" "Pardon?" "You heard me. This is a side of you I've never seen, all this shopping. I mean, come on Mulder, a nanny cam? You're beginning to scare me and I've had enough surprises for one day." She indicated the brand new Odyssey van with a sweep of her hand. "Hey, I couldn't have you transporting the babies in something that wasn't safe." "And I appreciate it, all of it. But --" she wanted to ask him what it all meant, but that was far too loaded a question right now. "What else?" "Well -- I sort of, maybe kind of, hired someone to help us out." "A -- you did what?" "Sort of like a nanny." "A nanny?" She groped for something to focus on other than the image of wet nurses and Fran Drescher. "More like a housekeeper, and before you go accusing me, it was your mom's idea for a baby gift. She had someone all picked out and the boys ran all the checks. A Mrs. Macintosh." "Lani. She goes to the same church as my mom." She supposed if she had to have someone, Lani Macintosh would be a good choice. Truthfully, she felt a small amount of relief. Besides feeling somewhat overwhelmed by all she had to do, her hormones were as erratic as they had been during the first part of her pregnancy. Worse, actually. "Scully, you okay with it?" A snuffling noise from the back of the van caught her attention. "Mulder, pull over." "They're fine, Scully. We're almost home." Almost home. That was the crux of the thing. Whose home was this? Hers? His? Theirs? She'd resigned herself to some semblance of shared responsibility for the twins, even existing under the same roof to do so, but how would it all work out? Where would they sleep? Spooning up together while she was pregnant was one thing; her size ensured things were kept strictly platonic, but what about now? Would he expect a different kind of relationship with her? Could things be more complicated? That their relationship was unconventional was an understatement; perhaps weird was a better description. As Mulder pulled the van into the driveway, the garage door opening with a click of the remote tucked into one of the overhead pockets, Scully felt cold fear grip her. She was a mother. A. Mother. Coming home to this strange place with two babies who depended upon her for their very survival. Her mouth felt dry and her eyes burned. Oh God. How was she going to be able to pull this off? "Well?" She knew by the tone of his voice that she'd missed something he'd said, and her brain refused to pull it up. Mulder's voice was far too cheerful, too confident. She looked into those hazel eyes and promptly burst into tears. ************* It had taken some maneuvering, but eventually Mulder managed to get the babies, Scully, and their assorted bags into the house. He was never so glad to see Maggie as he was at that moment. It was a toss-up trying to decide who to help first, babies or partner, but he'd never known Scully to cry much and his skills were limited. He left Scully with her mom and took the babies to their new room, still snuggled up in their carriers. It was beginning to look like they'd inherited their mother's ability to sleep through just about anything. Which was a good thing at the moment. The thought of three females crying at one time made him shudder. After getting them out of their sweaters and hats and tucking both girls into their cribs, he took up sentinel duty in the rocker. Truthfully, he didn't know what the hell he was supposed to do now. The pregnancy, house buying, and all the business associated with both those activities had kept him occupied for the last few months. Here they were, parents, without ever having shared more than a few snuggles as part of Scully's sleep therapy. A soft cry pulled him from his thoughts. Abigail. It was a mystery, how he was able to tell the difference between the two girls by sound alone. Scully claimed it was some primal thing. Rising, he made his way over to where she slept on her back. Her face was scrunched up and one hand had come out of the mitts she wore. He slipped the hand back in and stroked her hair. He was convinced it was going to be red and as much as Scully bemoaned it, he was glad. "Everything okay, Fox?" "Fine. She settled right back down." "That's good." Maggie stood at the door looking a little tired. "How's Dana?" He pulled the blanket back up around Abby. "I tucked her into bed. I think she's feeling a little overwhelmed." "I guess so." He gave a clipped laugh. "I'm feeling a little out of my element myself, but I don't have all those wacky hormones to contend with. I'm surprised she listened to you." "She was too tired to argue." "I'm afraid to leave them." He indicated both cribs. "They're beautiful, Fox, my two little angel grandbabies. They'll be fine. I imagine the device your friends gave you will pick up any little sound. Just turn it on and join me in the kitchen. I've made some tea." "Actually, I'm deathly afraid of what it might do that I don't know about. You've met Frohike." He chuckled and pointed at a Fisher Price monitor behind him. "Just don't tell the boys, Scully didn't want to hurt their feelings." He flipped the switch to on. "Tea sounds really good." "Come along then. You won't get a moment's rest when they wake up." He placed a soft kiss on each head before closing the door softly and following Maggie down the stairs. *************** Things settled into somewhat of a routine. Mulder had surprised Scully by taking some time off. She couldn't remember when his precious files had taken a back seat to anything. Living together was less awkward than she imagined it might be. Although they had separate bedrooms, she had yet to sleep by herself, and she had to admit, she liked it. She'd gotten used to being wrapped up snug against him. Of course, Mulder said it was just easier this way; he'd insisted on being involved and was getting up to bring the babies to her when they woke to nurse. She'd long gotten past the embarrassment of baring her breasts in his presence. At two in the morning, barely awake, she was on autopilot. At least they'd gotten the girls on a bit of a schedule, so she was taking care of both at once. That had been Lani's doing. Her second pregnancy had produced twins, so she was full of all sorts of helpful hints. Lani had proved to be invaluable around the house as well. She took care of the wash -- the hamper always seemed to be full -- and the cleaning up, which meant Scully could rest. Her mom was supplying dinners and for once, Scully sat back and allowed herself to be taken care of. Of course, Mulder had insisted that if she didn't she'd be stuck with the three stooges filling in, so she took what was offered. Even though her mom could drive her crazy at times, she had to admit that home cooked meals beat take out right now. Never mind what the effect might be on the babies. She'd given in and had a coffee one morning and paid for it the better part of the day with a fussy Amanda. She couldn't imagine what Thai or Chinese spices would do. She snuggled into the warmth of the bed. It was afternoon naptime; only, she was far from sleepy. A low baritone voice drifted through the open door and faded. She hadn't heard the doorbell, but clearly someone had come in. She glanced at the clock and decided to get up. A quick glance in the mirror told her a hair band would take care of her unruly hair and a sweatshirt would turn her pajamas into something resembling loungewear. She was just glad none of her coworkers would see her like this. She made her way down the stairs towards the family room where she could hear low voices. "Bill?" Her brother unfolded his tall frame from where he sat. "Danes." He passed the baby he held to her mom and enveloped her in a hug. "When did you get here?" She took in his uniform. "I thought you were stuck on a ship for the next month." "I am. I have an overnight before I head back out and Tara insisted we come visit. Rank," he indicated the stripes on his jacket, "does have some privileges." Scully realized she'd missed her sister-in-law sitting in the rocker with Abby. "Tara, I didn't even see you there. Don't get up. Were you going to let me sleep all day?" Just then Mulder entered, a tray of drinks in hand. "Scully, did we wake you?" He set the tray down and straightened up to face her. "Couldn't sleep." She took a seat, realizing neither man was going to sit down until she did. She was mildly amused to see her brother's expression as Mulder fussed over her. He seemed almost benign. "They're beautiful, Dana." Tara ran her fingers through Abby's hair. "This one seems to have the Scully hair." "And this one is all Fox," Maggie supplied. Scully was surprised to get no reaction from her brother. Well, not exactly _no_ reaction, just not the one she expected. He seemed almost pleased. She watched Mulder hand out coffee and then return to sit down beside her, draping his arm around her shoulder. For some reason the display brought a smile to her brother's face. "They certainly are beautiful, Danes. Matty was upset he couldn't come and meet his new cousins, but we promised him next time. Right, Tara?" She nodded in response. "Definitely next time." Scully was finding the whole scene just a little weird. Almost like there was a script everyone but her had been handed. She glanced at her mom, rocking Amanda, and at her partner who seemed lost in his head. "Sure, next time," she echoed. It wasn't until much later, after Bill and Tara left, that his conciliatory behavior was explained. Never put it past her mother to know exactly how to get Bill to behave, and her partner to want to keep the family peace at all costs. "Did it ever occur to either of you that I would have liked to have some say about who we chose as Godparents?" "That was my idea, dear, although I just hinted at it. It was Fox who made it official." "Scully, we've got two here. I figured letting Bill and Tara be Godparents to one of them would go a long way to keeping the peace." "They're not a pair of -- of -- a matched set -- or something." She felt her face flush with anger. "Now calm down, Scully. Getting all worked up isn't going to be good for --" a piercing cry interrupted him. "Right on schedule. Feeding time." She stood up. "I'll get her. This isn't over, Fox Mulder. And you, Mom -- going along with him." Another cry joined the first one, prompting Mulder to stand up with her. "I'll help." She opened her mouth to protest and closed it quickly. She wasn't going to have time to hash this out with him now. Together they made their way to the nursery. ********** Maggie began gathering the dishes from their light lunch. It had been nice seeing Bill and Tara. Even nicer had been watching the two couples interact with no animosity. And yes, Fox and Dana were most certainly a couple. Watching Dana move into motherhood was comforting. Truth be told, she'd had her doubts about the transition, wondering how maternal her youngest daughter really was. She never did buy into the idea that motherhood was instinctual for all women. For some it may be, but she'd known her fair share of young women who'd struggled with their identities as mothers when the feelings didn't match up to expectations. Dana's career had been so all-consuming since she graduated from medical school, and she seemed to absorb the role of mother much like she did anything. First, she attacked it from a learning angle. All that bed rest had given her ample time to read, and read she did. Maggie browsed through some of the volumes and couldn't believe the number of books and the variety of subject matter. Many she found far too technical, others were so much more like something Melissa would select she found it astonishing that Dana would choose to read them. She wondered if some of those might actually belong to Fox. She filled the sink and added the silverware to soak. It was very sweet of Fox to try and smooth things over with Bill by including him in the christening. And though she knew the move was calculated to make things easier between Dana and her brother, she knew there was a big part of Fox longing to belong, to be part of a family. Despite the misgivings she'd had regarding the conception, and she had quite a few of those, it seemed to be working out for the best. There were a number of single moms at St. Monica's, and when Dana first discussed joining their ranks, she couldn't help but worry. The thought of her daughter shouldering that responsibility all on her own was a little distressing. When she came to realize Fox would be the other half of the equation she relaxed. It had been obvious for the past couple of years that he cared deeply for Dana, and she was confident he wouldn't leave her alone to fend for herself. The two were certainly a matched pair. She was aware that their relationship was still developing, but if Fox had his way things wouldn't remain the way they were for long. "Wait until she hears what else Fox hinted at." Maggie's words fell into the silent room and she began gathering up the rest of the dishes, a knowing smile on her face. ************ ************ Title: Great Expectations: The Epilogue Author: Emily Sim and bellefleur ************* "Ah, shi--oot!" Mulder pulled his finger back and inspected the small indentation Abby had made in it. It was no wonder Scully had been reluctant to continue nursing when the twins started to teethe. Those little teeth were sharp. Abby just giggled as he nursed his finger. "Daddy, want out." Amanda tried to slink down in her high chair, but the straps stopped her. "Stuck, Daddy." Her mouth turned down in a pout and Mulder knew he had seconds to avoid a tantrum. "Shh, baby, come here." He pressed the button to the restraints and caught her as she slid down. He was rewarded with a sloppy oatmeal kiss. She wiped her hands along his t-shirt leaving two smears of wet cereal. It was a good thing he hadn't put on his work shirt yet; the t-shirt wasn't going to make it through breakfast clean. He settled Amanda on his lap and turned back to where Abigail was decorating her high chair tray with oatmeal. She lifted one chubby hand, full of the cereal. "Daddy have some?" Mulder shook his head, a big smile lighting his face. "No thank you Abby, you can finish it all." "Done, Daddy." She tried to dislodge the sticky mess from her hand and ended up flinging it towards Mulder. He looked down in dismay as it landed on his pants. How Scully managed this every morning without getting covered head to toe in cereal was a mystery. "Down, Daddy." Abigail lifted her arms in the air. "Just hold on a minute, sweetheart, Daddy has to clean your sister's hands first." He headed to the sink with Amanda, cleaning her up as best he could. She was reluctant to allow him to put her down and wrapped herself around his leg in protest when he did. She was like a weight as he moved over to retrieve Abby. When he pulled Abby out of the high chair he discovered she probably had more oatmeal outside than inside. He carried her to the sink at arm's length, though it was a moot point. Pulling her out had already deposited more drops of the gummy cereal on his shirt. As he plopped Abby beside the sink, Amanda decided she wanted to join her sister. "Me too, Daddy." He looked down as she tried to climb up his leg. "Just a minute, baby." He ran the water and wetted a cloth, but wasn't quite sure where to start. A scraping sound from behind caught his attention and he turned to find Abby pushing a chair over to the sink. He laughed as she managed to push it against the cupboards and climb up. Scully claimed Abby was going to be payback for all the ditching and crap he'd put her through over the years. He lifted her up and sat her down beside her sister. "What am I going to do with the two of you?" Abby grabbed his face and pulled him in for a kiss. "Funny, Daddy." Not to be outdone, Amanda reached around her sister and pulled at his shirt, leaving wet marks. Mulder scooped them both to him in a big hug. They were the delight of his life and he couldn't imagine living without them, or their mother. God, he loved them so much, but was thankful every day that there were only two. They could be a handful at times. Maggie echoed Scully when she reminded him, often, that it was payback time. He still marveled that things had worked out as well as they had, though Scully's recent health problems were a worry. He checked the time; Maggie should be here soon. Scully had looked so pale and worn when she went to bed last evening. When Skinner called with a new assignment, Mulder had called Margaret and asked her to help out for the day. He hated the thought of working on a Saturday, but Skinner had insisted he just needed a consult and that it would only take a few hours. With a twin on either hip, Mulder turned and surveyed the breakfast nook. It could wait until he got his princesses cleaned up. And his clothes changed. Skinner wouldn't appreciate him turning up covered in oatmeal. He headed towards the stairs. If they cooperated, he'd even have enough time to grab another coffee. * * * Exiting the bathroom, Scully checked the clock next to the bed and noted the time. The squeals from downstairs had tapered off a while ago, sometime after Mulder had tiptoed in to grab a clean suit from the closet. She knew he'd be leaving for work soon, but she hoped the stillness that had descended meant they could find a quiet moment to talk before he left. But not quite yet; she still had a few minutes to wait. Scully turned toward the desk, looking for something to distract her thoughts. On the corner, half obscured beneath a pile of papers, sat the baby books she had been meaning to update, if only she could find the time. She pulled out one of the slim volumes, ignoring the papers above that slid to the side, and gently thumbed backward through the unfinished pages. There were so many memories in here, waiting to be sorted and arranged. An envelope tucked between two sheets held locks from the girls' first haircuts. Amanda's hair had grown full and thick, the curls dangling into her eyes. At the time, Abby hadn't needed a cut yet, her hair so much finer and thinner, but Scully had taken a snip of it anyway. She liked to refer to the color as strawberry blonde, but Mulder was right--it was decidedly red. Poor child. Flipping back a few more pages, she encountered several photos of herself from her pregnant days, mostly snapshots that Mulder had taken while she was sleeping, the only time he could get near her with a camera. She smiled at the conjured image of him tiptoeing up behind her, careful not to wake the sleeping bear. And she had been a bear. The man had been a saint to forgive her many foibles during the difficult pregnancy. She had never been more grateful than when her hormones finally leveled off and her equilibrium returned, letting her finally feel herself again. When she thought back to her paranoia during those days, especially during the bed rest, she was ashamed of her doubts about Mulder's commitment to her and to fatherhood. Once the twins were born, he had taken to it all so naturally--although, at times, he was more like a third child himself. But she supposed that was just part of his charm. Her anxieties about the house had been unfounded, too. In fact, living with Mulder had been the easy part--at least, after she'd learned to ignore the dirty socks all over his side of the room. The hard part had been negotiating the changes in their partnership. All of their priorities had shifted, precipitated by that simple request she had made of him seemingly so long ago. She never could have predicted everything that would come of it. Including this latest development. Sighing at that thought, Scully dared a glance at the nightstand. She had stalled long enough. It was time to talk to Mulder. * * * Scully was surprised by how quiet things were when she descended the stairs. The open floor plan allowed a clear view of the family room as she entered the kitchen. Above the front end of the couch, two little heads were visible, both fixed toward the vibrant images on the television screen. Scully frowned. It wasn't like her girls to be so oblivious to her proximity. She briefly considered going in and shutting off the noisy box, but their preoccupation would allow her a moment alone with her partner. "Mulder, I wish you wouldn't let them watch so much TV." He turned to see her approach. "It's Sesame Street; it's educational. We can turn it off when it's over." Wiping his hands on the dishtowel, Mulder set it aside and reached for her. "I was just trying to find something quiet for them to do so you could rest. How are you feeling?" "Better." She gladly stepped into his embrace, and they shared a quick kiss before pulling apart. "I was about to grab some breakfast before I left. Can I get you anything?" He lifted his half-finished glass of milk from the counter and offered it to her. She quickly pushed it away. "Not that much better." Mulder gave her a sympathetic grimace and downed the rest of the milk. "I wish I didn't have to go in today. But your mom should be here soon, so you can take it easy." He turned to rinse out the glass and the few remaining dishes in the sink. "Mulder, we need to talk." "Okay," he tossed over his shoulder, not turning from his task. "Mulder." Her serious tone got his attention. The water went off, and he soon stood squarely facing her. "Should I be worried?" "You might want to sit down." "I'll take that as a 'yes.'" Grabbing the closest chair, he took a seat at the table, and Scully stepped forward to join him in the adjacent seat. Her eyes skittered toward the television, to her hands nervously picking at each other, then to the clock across the room. She was having a hard time meeting his eyes. Taking a deep breath, she hurriedly exhaled what she needed to say. "You know when we had that discussion about birth control, and I told you that because of my medical history, we didn't need to worry about it?" "Yeah?" he ventured warily. "Well, apparently I was wrong." Hesitantly reaching into the pocket of her bathrobe, she retrieved the thin, white stick she had carried down from the bathroom and placed it on the table in front of him. There was no mistaking the plus sign in the clear plastic window. "Scully, you don't mean..." "Yeah, I'm afraid so." For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of a dripping faucet and Elmo's off-key singing. "Holy shit." Yep. That about summed it up. ******** THE END ******** Final notes: bellefleur: Thanks for joining us on this ride! It's been fun. A big thanks to Emily Sim for agreeing to write this with me. She probably had no idea what she was getting herself into, but I can honestly say that none of this would have happened without her. Thank you also to all those who faithfully supported us with feedback and pokes, to those who provided beta help and advice along the way, and especially to all of those anonymous mothers of twins who were kind enough to post their stories on the internet so I could do research without enduring any of this myself. And my sincerest apologies to Scully for any stretch marks that may have inadvertently resulted from the extended gestational period. Emily Sim: This has been the best kind of adventure. Thanks to belle for putting up with my 'thought in process emails,' and biggest hugs to xdks, who is the best beta a gal could have! She keeps me from embarrassing myself, and any leftover errors are my own, of course! For all of you out there who provided steady feedback, your support really does make a difference. So very often an encouraging note showed up in such a timely manner I thought someone must have installed a spy cam. So, thank you, to all who took the time to read and to those who took time to send feedback.